General things that Annoy you

men who generalise about women in general being of an ilk, instead of saying 'some women annoy me when......'

The summer is here -so let's be a dirty old perve - threads that appear every summer.

Ginger people with dreadlocks

Dazzler21 said:

Ginger people with dreadlocks

and Bing ffs...

thanks google:

brogib said:

cabbles said:

DaveMehmet said:

cabbles said:

Intermittent mobile coverage shifting from 4 to 3G. I get signed out of here on 3G - angers me.

Also my house and general area is shocking for WIFI. Again exposing me to the perils of 3G.

Buffering on the vinegar strokes?

@DaveMehmet prob a ref to having a wank above but I'm not familiar to the terminology 'vinegar strokes' please advise

The shaft festering root = The Vinegar Bottle

You know the rest.....

Think it's norvvern, maybe Scouse

I'm gonna have to look it up brogib.

cabbles said:

Pre orgasmal point of no return. Got it.

To be fair the original point of my frustration re: 3G and wifi was I get signed out of here when it cuts to 3G. I can't think of one thread or time on here that I could honestly say I'm at the point of the vinegar strokes. If that was the case then I should be banned for being a very odd individual

Hey, don't shoot the messenger @cabbles pal!

; )

Dazzler21 said:

Cricket and Darts being referred to as 'sports'

True. You can't play sport with a jumper on. Bowls and golf are on that list too.

ricky_otto said:

People on a phone conversation moaning how hot they are on the train, like they're the only person Is about to melt.

Just a small observation fellow commuter, but what about taking the jumper off that you have on?

I see a few people with coats or jumpers on. How are they so impervious to the heat!?
On the train last night, that was probably set to gas mark 5, there was a bloke in his suit and tie. Not a bead of sweat on him!

The current obsession with Twerking.

Am I the only person who finds it really unattractive?

Going to the toilet at work... or the lack of etiquette involved.

Now allow me to qualify this, there has always been one sanctuary everywhere I have worked; the toilets. This is a place where all sins are forgotten and judgement is an alien concept. It's a place where you can be at one with the universe, completely alone with only your thoughts for company. It is also the one place where you can sit down and think "Awesome, I'm literally getting paid to have a shit.". It's bliss.

It's the one period of time where you can truly relax; in a 45 hour work week, of which 5 hours will inevitably be bone crushingly dull meetings mixed in with another 30 hours of staring out of the window thinking 'I wish I was out there. In that pub. Drinking that pint.' and 'Look at the skirt over there, I do love this weather.' (Before you remember that this weather will see you burrowed in to someones armpit on your commute home.)... it's calm.

So what annoys me about it? Two kinds of people...

The socialite

Nobody likes me where I work at the moment, it comes down to getting smashed after my second day and not really remembering enough to know what I did wrong - but I am a social lepper. I don't mind that, because it prevents me having conversations in The Sanctuary of The Toilet. However, I still see other poor souls cornered by the sink, basquing in their after-poop calmness before... boom, conversation right at ya face.

For me though, the annoyance is when I'm trying to go to the toilet. I have my trousers down by my ankles, twitter on my phone and I'm letting my hair down. I don't need to know about so-and-so's wedding, nor what you did last night. I just need to empty my bowels and collect my thoughts.

If you are going to attempt a conversation then please be warned, this is the one place where I can be as disgusting as I like. I fear no judgement for noise nor smell, and I will fuck your conversation up if I feel the need. You will hear things that can't be unheard, and you will smell things that modern medicine should be striving to prevent. See, when I'm enjoying my post-lunch poop I will no doubt be tanked up on a volatile mixture of coffee, nicotine, lunch times fruit and last nights curry - this is as healthy for your conversation as it is the toilet bowl.

See, it's not so much for selfish reasons that The Socialites annoy me - but it's for their own well being too. Just have your conversation in the corridor outside.

The Hygienist

The Hygienist is a peculiar beast, whereas most of us associate the toilets of our workplace with the sacred act of 'dropping the kids off' - these chaps see it as the ideal place to quickly brush their teeth on a whim. Whilst I could potentially understand doing it post-lunch (much like my own toilet routine) - I can't understand doing it at 4pm, when you've just been on the phone for 15 minutes.

However, it's not the act of being hygenic that I despise - it's the very fact that I can I hear you getting a nice froth in your mouth going whilst I'm trying to take a dump. Call me old fashioned, but I'm a gentleman and I genuinely fear for your health with the particles that are going to be in the air when I open my cubicle door. The thought actually makes me feel a little sick.

Covered End said:

Too much information.

If you think those words are bad, imagine what it's like having a conversation the other side of the cubicle door then!

You're getting off lightly compared to the poor guy who thinks the toilets make the perfect social hub.

I have a feeling working with the author of this book would be very annoying. Particularly referring to page 10. http://www.griffith.edu.au/__data/assets/pdf_file/0007/94543/workplacefunIdeas-education.pdf

I once worked with a man who at 10.30 exactly, would put his newspaper in his back pocket, his sandwiches in his overall pocket and go and spend at least 15 minutes in the toilet, eating and reading. I was always hoping, someone would go in the trap next door and have a stinking dump

Posh man in kebab shop tonight asks to 'taste the meat'

These people, wherever they are coming from, are ruining the soul of my city. 'Can I taste the meat?????'

I've heard it all now. I felt like confronting him and pointing out we're not at a top London restaurant, we're in Forest Hill/East Dulwich border.