Not really, he is living with her he is still looking for permanent work, we had dinner there he seemed ok, was nice to the kids and vice verser . My brother who also lives there has said some things like my mum us coming in from work at 7-30 and there is a sink full of washing up and nothing has been done, she then does some housework prepares and cooks dinner then sits down to eat alone, he eats about half hour later apparently, that sounds quite strange, my brother also says that his girlfriend doesn't stay there anymore because he made her feel uncomfortable. Not much to report other than that.
Sadie, I make some people feel uncomfortable but that's because I'm a little on the assertive side and I have a big gob...but I'm harmless and loads of fun. Give him a chance...lots of men don't do the washing up.
I always found this an interesting dilemma to look at from the outside and wondered if anything of note happened over the fesitve season? Did he buy you a present, did your Mum lavish him with gifts and get nothing in return - or at least only gifts that she had paid for.
Obviously if you don't want to share then tell me to nose off!
Mum bought crappy presents for everyone this year , due to still being in huge debt, I don't know if she bought him anything. He bought nothing but is not yet working either. Had them both over do Xmas he is still very quiet doesn't give much away, the kids seem to like him though And he showed great patience with them, they're quite a handful especially when they get over excited and are dosed high on sugar. The sickening thing is watching my mum being so fake, she's nice to everyone and helpful and even tries to be funny it's just a sickening act meh! He is bearable enough for the time being though, friendly and polite, he embraced Xmas which was good. But he's only been here a few months and hasn't got financial independence yet, that will be the tell tale time I think.
Made me think of this thread and wonder how it's going. There's a program on Channel 5 'Love Rats Exposed'. All the women seem to have thought 'but my one/situation isn't like all those others'. Although of course, there will be some genuine or at least who 'compromise' and aren't complete love rats
Also just seen this in an article on sham marriages, that actually mentions Tunisia
'MORE BRITS DUPED BY FOREIGNERS Delene Alouane, of Immigration Marriage Fraud UK, said that as well as people being paid to marry, rising numbers of Brits were falling in love - only to be duped by foreigners. She said there were growing numbers of men tying the knot with Thais, Filipinos or Malaysians who then cite domestic violence as a reason for divorce. And she added a string of British women were falling for men from countries such Tunisia, Morocco and the Gambia, who walk out the moment they get residency.'
Hi Fiona, he came in September I met him briefly the first week, he was polite and smiley he looked younger than I thought. My husband and kids met him a few weeks later again he seemed to make an effort with me and kids, seemed a bit nervous of my husband but very polite. I did notice he was very quiet. Put that down to language difference and shyness. My mum emotionally blackmailed me into having them round at Christmas, he was excellent with the kids, they liked him more than her, he seemed to embrace Christmas really well, I thought he may be alright. One of my younger brothers owns his own companies and gave him a job a couple of days a week and said that he was a really hard worker for him for only £30 a day, he was just happy to be out of the house, he applied for every job going in the mean time and now has a zero hours contract minimum wage job filling boxes in an asda warehouse he is now earning something at least. Everything from the outside looks quite rosy. However my other brother who lives with them paints a different picture, he tells me that my mum gets up in the morning puts washing in cleans kitchen tidies a bit then gets ready and leaves for work at 7.30, she gets home at 7.30 in evening prepares dinner (he don't like plain food) does dishes, takes washing out and hangs it up, vacuums the house feeds the dog cooks dinner, walks dog and has a bath, she sits down and eats dinner at about 10pm, he eats dinner about an hour after her whilst she is cleaning up after herself. He even if he is home all day will apparently let her go non stop and not lift a finger to help. I spoke to her about it and she went on the offensive, I don't talk to her often because the only chance she gets to call me is on the train on the way home from work, at this time I'm busy feeding and bathing the kids, I phoned and spoke to her once later in the evening whilst he was there but he started moaning at her because something wasn't washed so she had to cut it short. Haven't seen them since Christmas Day and there are no plans in place to see her anytime soon, as she won't come down without him and he works most weekends, that is basically the story so far... X
The cooking and cleaning thing may just be cultural. My girlfriend is Chinese and insists on doing everything, I work 17 hours a week at the moment, she works around 35 and our worst arguements are always about me helping, she believes if I have to clean my own stuff it reflects badly on her, we don't even live together.
She left my place at 8am to go to work this morning, I've just arrived at work at 6pm and we both finish at 9, there's gonna be a row cos I was a total asshole and washed my clothes this afternoon.
Thankfully I'm on the "better" side of this problem.
Yes, at least he is working (wasn't sure if his status allowed him to) and does work hard. But possibly just so that he has his own money - is he contributing? At least with your brother there, you have an objective view of whats going on, as your mum won't tell the whole story. There are many households/cultures where the woman does nearly everything at home!
If he's a muslim then it's almost expected that he would act in this manner.
My wife's parents (hindu) come to stay with us for prolonged periods. I'm pretty much barred from the kitchen. I can't do any washing up or cooking. One time I was doing the washing up after dinner. My father in law was having a go at my wife and mother in law because I should be watching TV while they do the cleaning up.
The cooking and cleaning thing may just be cultural. My girlfriend is Chinese and insists on doing everything, I work 17 hours a week at the moment, she works around 35 and our worst arguements are always about me helping, she believes if I have to clean my own stuff it reflects badly on her, we don't even live together.
She left my place at 8am to go to work this morning, I've just arrived at work at 6pm and we both finish at 9, there's gonna be a row cos I was a total asshole and washed my clothes this afternoon.
Thankfully I'm on the "better" side of this problem.
"However my other brother who lives with them paints a different picture, he tells me that my mum gets up in the morning puts washing in cleans kitchen tidies a bit then gets ready and leaves for work at 7.30, she gets home at 7.30 in evening prepares dinner (he don't like plain food) does dishes, takes washing out and hangs it up, vacuums the house feeds the dog cooks dinner, walks dog and has a bath, she sits down and eats dinner at about 10pm, he eats dinner about an hour after her whilst she is cleaning up after herself. He even if he is home all day will apparently let her go non stop and not lift a finger to help."
It may well be cultural but how many of the mainly British and male posters on here have commented on that state of affairs. I wonder why : - (
And the brother who is still living at home, could he not walk the dog, vacuum the house, clean up etc? OK he may also be working but it is still his mum and she is also working.
The cooking and cleaning thing may just be cultural. My girlfriend is Chinese and insists on doing everything, I work 17 hours a week at the moment, she works around 35 and our worst arguements are always about me helping, she believes if I have to clean my own stuff it reflects badly on her, we don't even live together.
She left my place at 8am to go to work this morning, I've just arrived at work at 6pm and we both finish at 9, there's gonna be a row cos I was a total asshole and washed my clothes this afternoon.
Thankfully I'm on the "better" side of this problem.
You are right Henry I missed out that my brother works 12 hour days walks the dog in the morning before he goes to work, buys and makes his own meals, cleans up after himself, does his own washing and pays rent.
You are right Henry I missed out that my brother works 12 hour days walks the dog in the morning before he goes to work, buys and makes his own meals, cleans up after himself, does his own washing and pays rent.
The cooking and cleaning thing may just be cultural. My girlfriend is Chinese and insists on doing everything, I work 17 hours a week at the moment, she works around 35 and our worst arguements are always about me helping, she believes if I have to clean my own stuff it reflects badly on her, we don't even live together.
She left my place at 8am to go to work this morning, I've just arrived at work at 6pm and we both finish at 9, there's gonna be a row cos I was a total asshole and washed my clothes this afternoon.
Thankfully I'm on the "better" side of this problem.
You utterly jammy bastard.
It's not as great as you think, for a start I love cooking and more importantly, at times, it feels like being a child again.
I've been resisting making a 'your mum likes Tunisian sausage' joke on the big man trousers/chipolata/bratwurst thread, and it's made me wonder how this is all going, Sadie? Your mum's fella still around?
He is very much still there she seems happy at the moment he don't seem as happy but he's been home and come back, he just sulked for a while when he came back, they went out together that time later this month he is going alone for a visit. I don't understand their relationship because they don't seem to understand each other she works all day he works some evenings and weekends so they barely see each other. However he hasn't hit her or turned her Muslim, he hadn't abandoned her yet, he seems to make an effort eith everyone, the kids really like him, so I won't be too disappointed if he hangs around.
Comments
Has anything happened in the last few months Sadie?
Obviously if you don't want to share then tell me to nose off!
Made me think of this thread and wonder how it's going. There's a program on Channel 5 'Love Rats Exposed'. All the women seem to have thought 'but my one/situation isn't like all those others'. Although of course, there will be some genuine or at least who 'compromise' and aren't complete love rats
'MORE BRITS DUPED BY FOREIGNERS
Delene Alouane, of Immigration Marriage Fraud UK, said that as well as people being paid to marry, rising numbers of Brits were falling in love - only to be duped by foreigners.
She said there were growing numbers of men tying the knot with Thais, Filipinos or Malaysians who then cite domestic violence as a reason for divorce.
And she added a string of British women were falling for men from countries such Tunisia, Morocco and the Gambia, who walk out the moment they get residency.'
The rest sounds like most homes where the woman does it all nothing wrong with that 8)
She left my place at 8am to go to work this morning, I've just arrived at work at 6pm and we both finish at 9, there's gonna be a row cos I was a total asshole and washed my clothes this afternoon.
Thankfully I'm on the "better" side of this problem.
If he's a muslim then it's almost expected that he would act in this manner.
My wife's parents (hindu) come to stay with us for prolonged periods. I'm pretty much barred from the kitchen. I can't do any washing up or cooking. One time I was doing the washing up after dinner. My father in law was having a go at my wife and mother in law because I should be watching TV while they do the cleaning up.
It may well be cultural but how many of the mainly British and male posters on here have commented on that state of affairs. I wonder why : - (
And the brother who is still living at home, could he not walk the dog, vacuum the house, clean up etc? OK he may also be working but it is still his mum and she is also working.
Good for him