Somehow bumped into an old YouTube video of Ronald Reagan (while he was president) making a speech which kind of ended up with him doing a stand-up routine of Soviet Union jokes. He was pretty good at it. Anyway, my favourite was a story about an ordinary Soviet-era citizen who had saved up all his life to buy a car and went down to the local dealer to pre-pay for a vehicle that would not be available for years. The dealer got him to sign the form and hand over his cash. And told him his car would be delivered in 10 years. The customer asked would that be morning or afternoon. The dealer laughed and said "you'll have been waiting ten years why does it matter?" The customer replied "Well, the plumber's coming in the morning."
MISTER Spock was the half Vulcan half human character in Star Trek, Doctor Spock was an American Pediatrician who in fairness would probably have encouraged kids to play with glue to learn the downsides.
Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject?
Now you mention Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
I gave this a lol.
But it should surely say cosmetic surgery not plastic surgery?
Without my plastic* surgeon, my face would be a mess of skin cancer lesions or I would be dead. He has done a lot of work in burns units and is currently in Bangladesh working pro bono for the Cleft charity of which he is Chairman. He is also a honorary consultant plastic surgeon for GOSH. (One in 700 children are born with a cleft palate.) So, no, I can't remember a time when plastic surgery was a taboo subject.
* Plastic in this context comes from the greek and means reshaping - not turning someone into a grotesque plastic parody of themselves.
Gave this a like because, worthy as it is, I couldn’t see the joke.
Shouldn't the picture above be in the HoC section? It is clearly political, and opens the door for the many pictures I would like to post concerning mainly Tory politicians.
No, because it is a joke and not a commentary on the politician.
No discussion of the various merits of the person or his policies.
A woman asks her husband at breakfast time, "Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit juice and coffee?"
He declines, saying, "Thanks for asking, but I'm not hungry right now. It's this Viagra. It's really taken the edge off my appetite."
At lunchtime, she again asks if he would like something to eat, suggesting, "How about a bowl of soup, home made muffins or a cheese sandwich?"
He declines. "The Viagra," he says, "Its really messed with my need for food."
Come dinnertime, she asks if he wants anything to eat. "Would you like a juicy rib eye steak and some scrumptious apple pie? Or maybe chicken or a tasty stir fry?"
He declines again. "No," he says, "It's got to be the Viagra. I'm still not hungry."
"Well," she says, "Would you mind getting off me? I'm starving!"
My Mrs claimed never to a have heard of the song, which is bollocks, she ripped the piss out of me when I welled up to Mark Strong singing it in Kingsmen 2.
Weird thing is we go into a pub in Prague later that evening and the girl singing performs that very song. Then my Mrs gets a Facebook video come up the next morning of the same song again.
Comments
Anyway, my favourite was a story about an ordinary Soviet-era citizen who had saved up all his life to buy a car and went down to the local dealer to pre-pay for a vehicle that would not be available for years. The dealer got him to sign the form and hand over his cash. And told him his car would be delivered in 10 years.
The customer asked would that be morning or afternoon. The dealer laughed and said "you'll have been waiting ten years why does it matter?" The customer replied "Well, the plumber's coming in the morning."
I’ll get my coat.
He declines, saying, "Thanks for asking, but I'm not hungry right now. It's this Viagra. It's really taken the edge off my appetite."
At lunchtime, she again asks if he would like something to eat, suggesting, "How about a bowl of soup, home made muffins or a cheese sandwich?"
He declines. "The Viagra," he says, "Its really messed with my need for food."
Come dinnertime, she asks if he wants anything to eat. "Would you like a juicy rib eye steak and some scrumptious apple pie? Or maybe chicken or a tasty stir fry?"
He declines again. "No," he says, "It's got to be the Viagra. I'm still not hungry."
"Well," she says, "Would you mind getting off me? I'm starving!"
Weird thing is we go into a pub in Prague later that evening and the girl singing performs that very song. Then my Mrs gets a Facebook video come up the next morning of the same song again.