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Toilet Roll

At the risk of sounding low class. I have to share my new discovery. Not toilet roll, but LUXARY toilet roll.

I always used to buy the cheap stuff. As long as it cleared the marmite motorway of wet jobby and didn't kermit I used to think : job done.

I recently was feeling flush whilst in a supermarket and brought the most expensive brand I could find. The difference is amazing. I'd encourage everyone to try. You cant explain the benefit, but your rusty sheriffs badge will thank you.

Just give it a go. 
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Comments

  • At the risk of sounding low class. I have to share my new discovery. Not toilet roll, buy LUXARY toilet roll.

    I always used to buy the cheap stuff. As long as it cleared the marmite motorway of wet hobby abd didn't kermit I used to think : job done.

    I recently was feeling flush whilst in a supermarket and brought the most expensive brand I could find. The difference is amazing. I'd encourage everyone to try. You cant explain the benefit, but your rusty sheriffs badge will thank you.

    Just give it a go. 

    Ahhhhh....I always assumed that you were a Smith?

    Now we know that your CL name is because of the state of your pirates after a turnout.
  • se9addick said:
    Just wait until you incorporate wet wipes, life changing. 
    We're supposed to be saving the planet. Wet wipes bad.
  • A thread for a*seholes 
  • edited July 2019
    se9addick said:
    Just wait until you incorporate wet wipes, life changing. 
    No no no no no

    Wet wipes go in the fridge if you have a dose of the "ballrooms"

    That is the only time you use them

    PS - While we are on the topic of loo roll - it has to be hanging fro mthe front on the roll - NOT on the same side of the wall
    PPS - I stand to wipe.  Don't sit - you just can't get enough purchase 

    As you were

    #pooclub
  • I only use wet wipes, followed by a precautionary dollop of Aloe Vera gel, in case the piles chose to make an appearance
  • At the risk of sounding low class. I have to share my new discovery. Not toilet roll, buy LUXARY toilet roll.

    I always used to buy the cheap stuff. As long as it cleared the marmite motorway of wet hobby abd didn't kermit I used to think : job done.

    I recently was feeling flush whilst in a supermarket and brought the most expensive brand I could find. The difference is amazing. I'd encourage everyone to try. You cant explain the benefit, but your rusty sheriffs badge will thank you.

    Just give it a go. 
    Any particular brand?
  • Just bought 32 rolls of Cushelle for a tenner from Lidl. Bargain! If it was just me that little haul would last for ages but as I have a wife who seems to need half a roll to mop up a few drips so they’ll probably be gone by the end of the month.
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  • Cos I go through it (not literally) rapidly with my IBS I buy in bulk from Makro . 
    Always bring extra when abroad ,  hotels never give you enough ! 
  • Use the bidet you savages.
  • Just bought 32 rolls of Cushelle for a tenner from Lidl. Bargain! If it was just me that little haul would last for ages but as I have a wife who seems to need half a roll to mop up a few drips so they’ll probably be gone by the end of the month.
    Not just my wife then. Drives me mad. Such a waste.
  • Swisdom said:
    se9addick said:
    Just wait until you incorporate wet wipes, life changing. 
    No no no no no

    Wet wipes go in the fridge if you have a dose of the "ballrooms"

    That is the only time you use them

    PS - While we are on the topic of loo roll - it has to be hanging fro mthe front on the roll - NOT on the same side of the wall
    PPS - I stand to wipe.  Don't sit - you just can't get enough purchase 

    As you were

    #pooclub
    +1 for the stand up wiping club. 

    The only problem with luxury bog roll is the potential for blocking the shitter. Especially if you are a scruncher (like me). 
  • Has anyone noticed there is less paper on a roll these days? They have made the diameter of the tube considerably larger on the brand my wife buys.
  • Sod standing up.

    Sit down, raise balls, wipe from back to the front.
  • Wet wipes are useless if you've just had a poonami.
  • Standing up wiping? Are you 5 years old? Gross 
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  • edited July 2019
    I don't remember Izal coming on a roll, but my nan always had it in little packets that dispensed one sheet at a time.  Apart from the complete and guaranteed discomfort of using it, the main thing that I remember is that you could use an entire packet and its hydrophobic properties would still mean your ring piece would still be as grubby as the moment the turtle's head popped out. The other thing is that it always said, 'medicated' on the packet. WTF was that about? Medicated! I don't want medication to be dispensed through a nonchalant smear of baking paper. What was it medicated with and why on earth would anyone want it?

    As to the OP, always get the most expensive that you can. It's the only way to guarantee you won't get little bog roll scrolls over the floor. Disgusting. 
  • Ringpieces were much tougher in the old days...  bring back Izal!
  • If you survived wiping your arse on school ‘toilet paper’ that doubled as tracing paper then you have my respect.
  • Ringpieces were much tougher in the old days...  bring back Izal!



  • Just bought 32 rolls of Cushelle for a tenner from Lidl. Bargain! If it was just me that little haul would last for ages but as I have a wife who seems to need half a roll to mop up a few drips so they’ll probably be gone by the end of the month.
    Not just my wife then. Drives me mad. Such a waste.
    Fellas, you're forgetting that the difference in anatomy means that a larger surface area needs wiping every time the ladies go for a wee, and that's before we get into the joys of period clean-up.
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