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Funniest reason for being kicked out of somewhere

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  • On my brother in laws stag weekend, I got thrown out of a club in Munich for goose stepping on the dance floor. After walking the streets for about an hour I stole a bike and cycled around for a bit, came across a German house / techno club, went in and remember getting really angry because I had to leave the bike outside....saying to the door man “vot if it Getz stolen?”

    The goose stepping bit has really tickled me :smiley:
  • edited May 2018
    On a stag do in London a couple of years ago. We ended up in a rough strip joint. I didn’t have any cash on me but in this place they had a stripper on stage and a load of scantily clad women walking around with pots getting you to chip in a pound every 15mintues.
    Quarter of an hour in, I’m stood there with my bank card as a Brazilian stripper holding a change pot screams at me to cough up my quid.
    All of a sudden this biker bouncer picks me and one of the boys who also didn’t have coins up, and launched us horizonatally through the air and onto the pavement.
    I hate strip clubs for lots of reasons and that pound-to-view one was the pits.
  • Valley11 said:

    On a stag do in London a couple of years ago. We ended up in a rough strip joint. I didn’t have any cash on me but in this place they had a stripper on stage and a load of scantily clad women walking around with pots getting you to chip in a pound every 15mintues.
    Quarter of an hour in, I’m stood there with my bank card as a Brazilian stripper holding a change pot screams at me to cough up my quid.
    All of a sudden this biker bouncer picks me and one of the boys who also didn’t have coins up, and launched us horizonatally through the air and onto the pavement.
    I hate strip clubs for lots of reasons and that pound-to-view one was the pits.

    Let me guess, this 'rough' strip club was Farringdon/Chancery Lane way?!
  • Valley11 said:

    On a stag do in London a couple of years ago. We ended up in a rough strip joint. I didn’t have any cash on me but in this place they had a stripper on stage and a load of scantily clad women walking around with pots getting you to chip in a pound every 15mintues.
    Quarter of an hour in, I’m stood there with my bank card as a Brazilian stripper holding a change pot screams at me to cough up my quid.
    All of a sudden this biker bouncer picks me and one of the boys who also didn’t have coins up, and launched us horizonatally through the air and onto the pavement.
    I hate strip clubs for lots of reasons and that pound-to-view one was the pits.

    Let me guess, this 'rough' strip club was Farringdon/Chancery Lane way?!
    Maybe ye olde axe. Most of the strippers in there have marks on their backs from cigarettes being put out.
  • Have been chucked out of a few places over the years, mainly justified tbh! Used to go to a club in Brighton called volts or volks in the late 90’s, as it was the only place you could get into wearing trainers and without the usual snobby Brighton attitude to out of towners. Had been on a sesh and was in a poor state. Positioned myself next to the DJ, as I was out of the way of the crowd, but I was unstable and kept wobbling back and forth, knocking into the decks! The DJ lost his patience when I staggered back and put my elbow on one of the records. A bit of improvised scratching! Though o was gonna get sling out, but they just moved me into another corner where I could do less damage haha!
  • Back in the early 80’s my mate got thrown out of a nightclub in Magaluf for falling asleep in the gents toilet ... with his head in a urinal. No wonder this country’s youth had a bad reputation back in the day
  • Valley11 said:

    On a stag do in London a couple of years ago. We ended up in a rough strip joint. I didn’t have any cash on me but in this place they had a stripper on stage and a load of scantily clad women walking around with pots getting you to chip in a pound every 15mintues.
    Quarter of an hour in, I’m stood there with my bank card as a Brazilian stripper holding a change pot screams at me to cough up my quid.
    All of a sudden this biker bouncer picks me and one of the boys who also didn’t have coins up, and launched us horizonatally through the air and onto the pavement.
    I hate strip clubs for lots of reasons and that pound-to-view one was the pits.

    Let me guess, this 'rough' strip club was Farringdon/Chancery Lane way?!
    Near Holborn, I think
  • Valley11 said:

    Valley11 said:

    On a stag do in London a couple of years ago. We ended up in a rough strip joint. I didn’t have any cash on me but in this place they had a stripper on stage and a load of scantily clad women walking around with pots getting you to chip in a pound every 15mintues.
    Quarter of an hour in, I’m stood there with my bank card as a Brazilian stripper holding a change pot screams at me to cough up my quid.
    All of a sudden this biker bouncer picks me and one of the boys who also didn’t have coins up, and launched us horizonatally through the air and onto the pavement.
    I hate strip clubs for lots of reasons and that pound-to-view one was the pits.

    Let me guess, this 'rough' strip club was Farringdon/Chancery Lane way?!
    Near Holborn, I think
    Must be The Griffin.
  • Mine has to be getting fired from my first job. The boss called me in and said "Monday you don't turn up. Tuesday you turn up late. Wednesday you turn up - you don't work Wednesdays!!"
  • I got thrown out of the Vatican. I was wandering around an área apart from St Peters square with my wife, There was a small church and she expressed a wish to go in and light a candle for her father. However, she came out almost instantlt as she was wearing a very light blouse with just straps on the shouder, and someone inside said they could see too much shoulder and it was disrespectfull. So to help out I gave her my Charlton shirt to wear, and she went back in.At this point the local clergy descended in forcé as I was now 'topless' and slung me out - my explanation didn't contain enough Italian to be understood.
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  • Ken’s post has just reminded me when I visited St Vitus Cathedral in Prague. There was this warden who looked like Albert Einstein, politely going round asking tourists to remove their hats and calmly pointing to signs referring to expected behaviour etc.
    Then this woman, well in her 70’s was leaning over a cordoned area to take a photo of something, Albert, had a quiet word which the woman obviously didn’t understand. About 10 seconds later, still determined to get her picture, she moved one of the cordon posts about 4 inches.
    Albert exploded, the whole place turned round to see him shouting at this woman as he beckoned 2 other wardens over, who frogmarched the woman out.
    It was akin to somebody being found out trying to move in on the Krays territory.
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