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Has the Jokes thread disappeared?

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  • This sign has appeared in Dunedin airport NZ.  It is to do with drop off times ...


    They can be very "to the point" in New Zealand. The sat navs are hilarious. They get really tetchy if you miss a turning. They also come up with phrases like "You have reached your destination, time for a steak and cheese pie." Or "put on your jandles and head to the beach".
  • cafcfan said:
    This sign has appeared in Dunedin airport NZ.  It is to do with drop off times ...


    They can be very "to the point" in New Zealand. The sat navs are hilarious. They get really tetchy if you miss a turning. They also come up with phrases like "You have reached your destination, time for a steak and cheese pie." Or "put on your jandles and head to the beach".
    They are more direct at Leeds Airport as Yorkshire folk are. Three minutes - get thee awt. Any longer: get a blooming hotel.
  • what do farmers feed their cows for breakfast?

    mooesli
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  • I got a lovely compliment the other day, some woman shouted PLETHORA at me.

    I turned around, and said... "That means a lot"

  • I wonder if FA has any others up his sleeve
  • Why is there only one word for thesaurus? 
  • Looking at the famous bridge north of Edinburgh was told they have a revolutionary new paint that allows you to put on several years' worth of coats in one go. Now they go to the Forth and multi-apply.
  • edited November 17
    Made a big mistake at the dentist the other day. He said 'spit it out' so I told him I've been bonking his wife.
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  • As Ephraim Zimbalist junior said to Ephraim Zimbalist senior: „ain‘t you got any fucking imagination, Dad?“.
  • Why do Geordies like shopping at budget German supermarkets?

    Because they’re open Aldi
  • Just went to get a coffee and it started to laugh at me. 

    It was a mocha.
  • I ordered a coffee but all I got was a cup with a small monkey in it. 

    It was a capuchino.
  • I’m bald but I still own a comb. I just can’t part with it.
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