Fathers definitely have rights but it's sometimes difficult to enforce them unless you have the money for expensive legal costs. I divorced in 1995 and endured prejudice as a father from various bodies who often just talk bollocks. Very difficult position if you're not the main carer and there is still a lot of prejudice against fathers from both men and women. My patience was tested to the limit on numerous occasions but somehow I kept my temper in check! Children deserve better!
It meant she could not move her boyfriend into what was my home for at least 6 months, i wanted longer, but the judge just looked at me and said you want her to get on with her life dont you. Fair enough i said but what about me, he just shrugged his shoulders.
Believe me when i say all the guy is, is a walking pound .
Keep it friendly mate . As above loaded against guys . Kepy it sweey as a nut and did all paperwork myself best result as got good deal and no cost , also its the children first. Good luck and keep chin up .
In my case I found that the ex could lie and was believed by the Judge,I would tell the truth time and time again and was not believed repeatedly being called a liar,by the judge court welfare officers and social services.Due to the allegations made by the ex friends deserted me in droves.people refused to speak to me.Now the up side after 17 years the ex came clean and told the truth,my children and I have a very good relationship and to coin a phrase already used I could look them in the eye and tell them I did my best they were let down by the system which they accept.The children`s relationship with the ex is patchy to say the least.The shame is you can`t sue a judge but you can sue the system.As long as you can look your children in the eye and say with your hand on your heart I did my best you can rest easy.Mediation will only work if both parties tell the truth,but do try to stay amicable even if you don`t like the taste,above all remember it is not the children`s fault.PS always use a female solicitor they are more inclined to go for the throat.
Thanks all for your help and input ( nearly all!). Have spoken to David Terry in Ashford who certainly is a Rottweiller. I will put his response in simple form. " it doesn't matter what you try and do, or he bad the wife is, your son has not got a cats chance in hell of winning the kids". " He should face up to it and move on to a new life as quickly as possible".
Anyone on here want to have a chat about equal rights for women?
You don't have any rights,a split will ruin your life.You will pay through the nose,loose practically everything.Your only hope is by the time you finish paying you have time before retirement to rebuild.You will knock back workplace promotions as the money for the extra responsibility will be taken off you. Women think they are hard done by!!!!!
Tread very carefully indeed, consider the kid's best interests not punishment for a cheating partner and be very sceptical about hiring family solicitors.
All cases are different but sadly there is almost no such thing as "Father's rights" and a huge amount of money can be wasted finding that out. Most firms will give a free / low cost "initial consultation" which will give you the legal bad news but from that point forward consider mediation or if necessary representing yourself in court. F4J used to have lots of expertise within its ranks and there is lots of advice online.
Also bear in mind that who is cheating or not cheating on who is completely irrelevant in the family courts and whatever route you choose (assuming mutual/amicable split is not possible) will be painful, expensive and probably take at least 2 years to get resolved.
an excellent post .. not what many 'wronged' fathers & husbands like to read but VERY realistic, pertinent and accurate
I'm going to court next Thursday its cost me £3500 to do this but my solicitor is a lady that is very fierce and scares the life out of me but she reckons she's got such a case and how good she is that she will get my wife out the house and me back in it with my children
Is that from Thomas Boyd?
Sorry only just come back to this thread, yes that's correct
Thanks all for your help and input ( nearly all!). Have spoken to David Terry in Ashford who certainly is a Rottweiller. I will put his response in simple form. " it doesn't matter what you try and do, or he bad the wife is, your son has not got a cats chance in hell of winning the kids". " He should face up to it and move on to a new life as quickly as possible".
Anyone on here want to have a chat about equal rights for women?
Told you! He was no less direct with me, took me aback at first but I was grateful for that straight talking later on. That doesn't mean he won't try to do the best for your boy though. He dealt with my fruitloop of an ex (see another thread for details) brilliantly.
Anyway, hope your son gets the best possible in the circumstances. I hope his wife sees how important it is that their kids see their dad. For what it's worth, my other half and I are both passionate about the kids seeing their father, even though he's been a bit of a dick at times. It's important for them, and you can't love them and deny them spending time with their father (assuming the obvious). More people think this way than it seems.
I once met someone who was an expert in child psychology who pointed out that in all his years in practice he had never had a child referred to him for being loved by too many people.
In my case I found that the ex could lie and was believed by the Judge,I would tell the truth time and time again and was not believed repeatedly being called a liar,by the judge court welfare officers and social services.Due to the allegations made by the ex friends deserted me in droves.people refused to speak to me.Now the up side after 17 years the ex came clean and told the truth,my children and I have a very good relationship and to coin a phrase already used I could look them in the eye and tell them I did my best they were let down by the system which they accept.The children`s relationship with the ex is patchy to say the least.The shame is you can`t sue a judge but you can sue the system.As long as you can look your children in the eye and say with your hand on your heart I did my best you can rest easy.Mediation will only work if both parties tell the truth,but do try to stay amicable even if you don`t like the taste,above all remember it is not the children`s fault.PS always use a female solicitor they are more inclined to go for the throat.
I'm 100% certain that my ex-girlfriend and mother of my children, bribed a local publican to say that she was there instead of with me on a particular night. She actually risked getting a prison sentence for herself to try to hurt me.
I'm ok, married a woman 35 years ago who loved cooking and DIY. She always tells people I take her everywhere, to be honest, it saves me having to kiss her goodbye !
I'm going to court next Thursday its cost me £3500 to do this but my solicitor is a lady that is very fierce and scares the life out of me but she reckons she's got such a case and how good she is that she will get my wife out the house and me back in it with my children
Is that from Thomas Boyd?
Sorry only just come back to this thread, yes that's correct
You don't have any rights,a split will ruin your life.You will pay through the nose,loose practically everything.Your only hope is by the time you finish paying you have time before retirement to rebuild.You will knock back workplace promotions as the money for the extra responsibility will be taken off you. Women think they are hard done by!!!!!
On the other hand, I'm in the process of divorce right now. It couldn't be going more smoothly - after 13 years of marriage. She's not trying to take me for every penny I've got, neither of us have been hysterically emotional about it and there's no Eastenders-style bickering about anything. You just need to be adults and move on.
You don't have any rights,a split will ruin your life.You will pay through the nose,loose practically everything.Your only hope is by the time you finish paying you have time before retirement to rebuild.You will knock back workplace promotions as the money for the extra responsibility will be taken off you. Women think they are hard done by!!!!!
On the other hand, I'm in the process of divorce right now. It couldn't be going more smoothly - after 13 years of marriage. She's not trying to take me for every penny I've got, neither of us have been hysterically emotional about it and there's no Eastenders-style bickering about anything. You just need to be adults and move on.
Yeah, but you both need to be adults, and you can't control the other one.
You don't have any rights,a split will ruin your life.You will pay through the nose,loose practically everything.Your only hope is by the time you finish paying you have time before retirement to rebuild.You will knock back workplace promotions as the money for the extra responsibility will be taken off you. Women think they are hard done by!!!!!
On the other hand, I'm in the process of divorce right now. It couldn't be going more smoothly - after 13 years of marriage. She's not trying to take me for every penny I've got, neither of us have been hysterically emotional about it and there's no Eastenders-style bickering about anything. You just need to be adults and move on.
Yeah, but you both need to be adults, and you can't control the other one.
Nobody marries a wrongun,a lot of women suffer depression and a trigger will set them off,ie feelings of neglect,the feeling of being bored with life,looking for excitement etc etc and once the jeanie is out of the bottle it is difficult to put back,it never matters to them who is right or wrong you are wrong to varying degrees, .For some reason{they are unlikely to be prosecuted}women find it very easy to commit perjury in family court.Strange that a man breaks a court order once and he is likely to be sent to jail women break court orders on average 17 times nothing happens and until something happens to change this you are on a loser.Always remember the children are the most import thing so sometime you just have to bite the bullet.
I tend to think more men suffer depression these days. And are more notable for having a mid life crisis. Trade in for a younger model. Seen it loads if times.
listening to some of you wronged men, I'd be interested to know how many of you cheated on your partners.
Update. The wife was arrested at 11.45pm last night after common assault on the daughter in law. Released from Bromley nick at 11am today. Had to make me own breakfast. Her latest " your mum and dad will never see the kids again" tipped er indoors over the edge. Don't think she will threaten it again as the police said they thought she was unstable.
sorry masicat do you mean your wife was accused of assaulting your daughter in law who has been cheating on your son
if so no matter how hard surely you 2 need to be totally not involved and therefore a place where the children can be away from the arguing and fighting
don't mean to speak out of term but this is your sons fight, not yours
sorry masicat do you mean your wife was accused of assaulting your daughter in law who has been cheating on your son
if so no matter how hard surely you 2 need to be totally not involved and therefore a place where the children can be away from the arguing and fighting
don't mean to speak out of term but this is your sons fight, not yours
Agree. But she has decided to target my wife this week and paid the price.
No I'm not. I'm getting a bit pissed off with the general slagging of women and that they are all the evil doers in everything. I'm just pointing I've seen men behave badly in a lot of relationships.
Northseas post could relate to a man just as much as it could to a woman!! But doesn't even mention men's behaviour.
righto not much slagging off of women more situations people are in , its very rarely men who play god with their children as they never have any rights in the first place,
Comments
Very difficult position if you're not the main carer and there is still a lot of prejudice
against fathers from both men and women. My patience was tested to the limit on numerous occasions but somehow I kept my temper in check!
Children deserve better!
Believe me when i say all the guy is, is a walking pound .
Good luck and keep chin up .
Anyone on here want to have a chat about equal rights for women?
Anyway, hope your son gets the best possible in the circumstances. I hope his wife sees how important it is that their kids see their dad. For what it's worth, my other half and I are both passionate about the kids seeing their father, even though he's been a bit of a dick at times. It's important for them, and you can't love them and deny them spending time with their father (assuming the obvious). More people think this way than it seems.
I once met someone who was an expert in child psychology who pointed out that in all his years in practice he had never had a child referred to him for being loved by too many people.
Worth bearing in mind as things pan out.
Tho rikofold you should have left your fruitloop years before.
"I'm not getting married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and I'll buy her a house!".
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/r/rod_stewart.html
listening to some of you wronged men, I'd be interested to know how many of you cheated on your partners.
if so no matter how hard surely you 2 need to be totally not involved and therefore a place where the children can be away from the arguing and fighting
don't mean to speak out of term but this is your sons fight, not yours
I try to remember that a calm man beats an angry man everytime
Northseas post could relate to a man just as much as it could to a woman!! But doesn't even mention men's behaviour.