When you keep getting glimpses of your missus looking at you, out of the corner of your eye, as if she wants to thrust a broken bottle of sauvignon blanc into your neck and you have no idea why.
When you keep getting glimpses of your missus looking at you, out of the corner of your eye, as if she wants to thrust a broken bottle of sauvignon blanc into your neck and you have no idea why.
When you keep getting glimpses of your missus looking at you, out of the corner of your eye, as if she wants to thrust a broken bottle of sauvignon blanc into your neck and you have no idea why.
When you keep getting glimpses of your missus looking at you, out of the corner of your eye, as if she wants to thrust a broken bottle of sauvignon blanc into your neck and you have no idea why.
Too many years working in chokey....
It does make you a bit paranoid....
Parent at my girl's school is a prison warder and says basically that, he's on constant guard. He did settle beautifully the old "what's the funniest thing you've heard at the school gates" conversation with "heard a few Hello Guvs"!
Which segues to my rant... I can damn well guess which parents. If picking up young children, try not to be aggressive and swear loudly. It's really isn't difficult.
When you keep getting glimpses of your missus looking at you, out of the corner of your eye, as if she wants to thrust a broken bottle of sauvignon blanc into your neck and you have no idea why.
Too many years working in chokey....
It does make you a bit paranoid....
Parent at my girl's school is a prison warder and says basically that, he's on constant guard. He did settle beautifully the old "what's the funniest thing you've heard at the school gates" conversation with "heard a few Hello Guvs"!
Which segues to my rant... I can damn well guess which parents. If picking up young children, try not to be aggressive and swear loudly. It's really isn't difficult.
1) enter email and guess at password 2) get told password is wrong 3) click on 'reset password' 4) password reset page loads but why the hell do I have to type in my email again? why can't the stupid internet figure out how to remember the email that I've already typed in the previous page? it's not like I've changed my email address in the 2 seconds it took for the page to load. bloody annoying every time
The poxy M23 being closed last night from Gatwick back to junction 7 of the M25.
The plane was delayed so after collecting a very tired @Len\'s_little_girl after 11pm I had to drive all round the houses via Reigate to reach the M25 and drive home to arrive well after midnight.
1) enter email and guess at password 2) get told password is wrong 3) click on 'reset password' 4) password reset page loads but why the hell do I have to type in my email again? why can't the stupid internet figure out how to remember the email that I've already typed in the previous page? it's not like I've changed my email address in the 2 seconds it took for the page to load. bloody annoying every time
When I enter my new password, always seem to get told "new password can't be the same as old password", even though I've just spent 10 minutes trying to log in using the "old password".
Fairly sure I've mentioned the following before, but it's still happening and still annoying me:
Insert card into ATM:
1. Fast Cash 2. Cash and balance 3. Cash and receipt
Select "Fast Cash" "Do you want to see your balance?" No, f*#k off. I would have selected "Cash & Balance" if I did. "Do you want a receipt for this transaction?" No you f#%king moron. I just want cash. Give me my f%*king money!
Computer updates. I seem to get one about every 10 days now. After it is done nothing at all has changed, and it takes about ten to fifteen minutes to restart afterwards. Then you have to allow "so and so to update on your hard drive", and still nothing is different...
Golf for me is the ultimate non-spectator sport, however I am familiar with it and have inadvertently watched highlights etc.
2 things happen when I hear golf fans shout "in the hole" or "get in the hole" I think about Vinny Jones shouting that in the tunnel before the FA cup final in how he said he was going to rip McMahon's head off and shit in the hole. Or I start giggling thinking they do that when they are trying to thumb in their meagre half hard penis into their poor wife's minky
Golf for me is the ultimate non-spectator sport, however I am familiar with it and have inadvertently watched highlights etc.
2 things happen when I hear golf fans shout "in the hole" or "get in the hole" I think about Vinny Jones shouting that in the tunnel before the FA cup final in how he said he was going to rip McMahon's head off and shit in the hole. Or I start giggling thinking they do that when they are trying to thumb in their meagre half hard penis into their poor wife's minky
I only think one thing when I hear it.... "shut up you fucking twats!
I used to have this really shit golf game on a PC back in the 90s that I think came with it... every time the ball went near the hole the computer would bark "get there!" is an tinny american accent. To this day, me and my brother say that to each other at every possible inopportune moment.
Others have probably mentioned something similar but the staggering inability of everyone else in my household to competenly load even one fecking item into the dishwasher.
Computer updates. I seem to get one about every 10 days now. After it is done nothing at all has changed, and it takes about ten to fifteen minutes to restart afterwards. Then you have to allow "so and so to update on your hard drive", and still nothing is different...
Ah.... @Algarveaddick I feel your pain. The amount of time and productivity lost across my employer's organisation due to windows updates must be staggering. I'm sure some smart arse in IT thought it was money saving wheeze not to upgrade to the latest version in the past but the result seems to be updates for everyone almost daily at the moment.
Others have probably mentioned something similar but the staggering inability of everyone else in my household to competenly load even one fecking item into the dishwasher.
I don't understand dishwashers
My bird has one, the amount of time you have to faff around with it you could have washed it up yourself. And you also have to wait days to fill it up meaning there's nothing clean and you almost resort to the paper plates.
I've just bought a new car. It's not new but new to me. It's three years old and the result of a lot of procrastination and research about what to get and realisation that my megre savings weren't going to cut it so, for the first time in about 30 years, I took out a personal loan and bit the bullet by upping my budget.
After ages looking I find one that ticks most of my boxes within the limited budget I had. It is pristine bodywork wise, much like its owner
I picked it up last Tuesday. Drove it into work on Thursday. Did a site visit first thing then back to the office. Another couple of trips down to train station to pick up a ticket because my twonk of a colleague had ordered the wrong thing. Don't ask.
I gets in that night, stands back to admire my gleaming pride and joy...and some twat has clearly opened their door up and put a dint in the front wing, presumably one of my colleagues in the office car park too. Must have known they'd done it but didn't even fess up and apologise.
First fecking day on the road. What's the flipping point...
I've just bought a new car. It's not new but new to me. It's three years old and the result of a lot of procrastination and research about what to get and realisation that my megre savings weren't going to cut it so, for the first time in about 30 years, I took out a personal loan and bit the bullet by upping my budget.
After ages looking I find one that ticks most of my boxes within the limited budget I had. It is pristine bodywork wise, much like its owner
I picked it up last Tuesday. Drove it into work on Thursday. Did a site visit first thing then back to the office. Another couple of trips down to train station to pick up a ticket because my twonk of a colleague had ordered the wrong thing. Don't ask.
I gets in that night, stands back to admire my gleaming pride and joy...and some twat has clearly opened their door up and put a dint in the front wing, presumably one of my colleagues in the office car park too. Must have known they'd done it but didn't even fess up and apologise.
First fecking day on the road. What's the flipping point...
I've just bought a new car. It's not new but new to me. It's three years old and the result of a lot of procrastination and research about what to get and realisation that my megre savings weren't going to cut it so, for the first time in about 30 years, I took out a personal loan and bit the bullet by upping my budget.
After ages looking I find one that ticks most of my boxes within the limited budget I had. It is pristine bodywork wise, much like its owner
I picked it up last Tuesday. Drove it into work on Thursday. Did a site visit first thing then back to the office. Another couple of trips down to train station to pick up a ticket because my twonk of a colleague had ordered the wrong thing. Don't ask.
I gets in that night, stands back to admire my gleaming pride and joy...and some twat has clearly opened their door up and put a dint in the front wing, presumably one of my colleagues in the office car park too. Must have known they'd done it but didn't even fess up and apologise.
First fecking day on the road. What's the flipping point...
Others have probably mentioned something similar but the staggering inability of everyone else in my household to competenly load even one fecking item into the dishwasher.
Only one other person in my house realises that you have to load the dishwasher and they think you have to cram stuff into every tiniest nook and cranny. Consequently the water never circulates properly and it all has to be done again. Grrrr!
I've just bought a new car. It's not new but new to me. It's three years old and the result of a lot of procrastination and research about what to get and realisation that my megre savings weren't going to cut it so, for the first time in about 30 years, I took out a personal loan and bit the bullet by upping my budget.
After ages looking I find one that ticks most of my boxes within the limited budget I had. It is pristine bodywork wise, much like its owner
I picked it up last Tuesday. Drove it into work on Thursday. Did a site visit first thing then back to the office. Another couple of trips down to train station to pick up a ticket because my twonk of a colleague had ordered the wrong thing. Don't ask.
I gets in that night, stands back to admire my gleaming pride and joy...and some twat has clearly opened their door up and put a dint in the front wing, presumably one of my colleagues in the office car park too. Must have known they'd done it but didn't even fess up and apologise.
First fecking day on the road. What's the flipping point...
Probably a Brexiter.
No its a Daewoo.
You might be onto something there...maybe it's time to relaunch the Leyland Brexiteer or some such death trap.
Others have probably mentioned something similar but the staggering inability of everyone else in my household to competenly load even one fecking item into the dishwasher.
I don't understand dishwashers
My bird has one, the amount of time you have to faff around with it you could have washed it up yourself. And you also have to wait days to fill it up meaning there's nothing clean and you almost resort to the paper plates.
My in-laws also have one. Pa-in-law, being inspector gadget, has to have every mod con, and in fairness it's a good dishwasher. But, even when we are staying and there's four of us in the house, I have to keep opening it up to find a mug and then hand wash it myself after a couple of days as we wait for the day a full wash is ready. Never seen the need for one unless you have a big family, as you say - it's quicker to just do it by hand.
Looking at the players insta stories right now shows how wonderful Wembley is in the sun with the roof open. What annoys me is that they won’t open it on a match day even if the weather is looking good.
Looking at the players insta stories right now shows how wonderful Wembley is in the sun with the roof open. What annoys me is that they won’t open it on a match day even if the weather is looking good.
Comments
It does make you a bit paranoid....
I love the latter but the salted caramel desert I just tasted was a pathetic attempt. If it’s just caramel, call it caramel.
Which segues to my rant... I can damn well guess which parents. If picking up young children, try not to be aggressive and swear loudly. It's really isn't difficult.
But this is a proper first world problem!!
IT FUCKING IS
1) enter email and guess at password
2) get told password is wrong
3) click on 'reset password'
4) password reset page loads but why the hell do I have to type in my email again? why can't the stupid internet figure out how to remember the email that I've already typed in the previous page? it's not like I've changed my email address in the 2 seconds it took for the page to load. bloody annoying every time
The plane was delayed so after collecting a very tired @Len\'s_little_girl after 11pm I had to drive all round the houses via Reigate to reach the M25 and drive home to arrive well after midnight.
Knackered today.
Fairly sure I've mentioned the following before, but it's still happening and still annoying me:
Insert card into ATM:
1. Fast Cash
2. Cash and balance
3. Cash and receipt
Select "Fast Cash"
"Do you want to see your balance?" No, f*#k off. I would have selected "Cash & Balance" if I did.
"Do you want a receipt for this transaction?" No you f#%king moron. I just want cash. Give me my f%*king money!
This might explain it:
https://www.golf.com/tour-and-news/bubba-watson-serves-mac-and-cheese-masters-champions-dinner
Good shot, playing well enough to win = Mac n Cheese, Mac n Cheese.
2 things happen when I hear golf fans shout "in the hole" or "get in the hole" I think about Vinny Jones shouting that in the tunnel before the FA cup final in how he said he was going to rip McMahon's head off and shit in the hole. Or I start giggling thinking they do that when they are trying to thumb in their meagre half hard penis into their poor wife's minky
I only think one thing when I hear it.... "shut up you fucking twats!
My bird has one, the amount of time you have to faff around with it you could have washed it up yourself. And you also have to wait days to fill it up meaning there's nothing clean and you almost resort to the paper plates.
After ages looking I find one that ticks most of my boxes within the limited budget I had. It is pristine bodywork wise, much like its owner
I picked it up last Tuesday. Drove it into work on Thursday. Did a site visit first thing then back to the office. Another couple of trips down to train station to pick up a ticket because my twonk of a colleague had ordered the wrong thing. Don't ask.
I gets in that night, stands back to admire my gleaming pride and joy...and some twat has clearly opened their door up and put a dint in the front wing, presumably one of my colleagues in the office car park too. Must have known they'd done it but didn't even fess up and apologise.
First fecking day on the road. What's the flipping point...