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General Things that Amuse You

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  • T_C_E said:
    Talking at The Valley to a couple of ex staff yesterday about when they were employed by the club and RM re wrote a section of the employees handbook on dress code.
    The section on female match day dress code was along the lines of skirts no shorter than 2" above the knee , no jeans torn or otherwise, no scoop or vest tops.
    The quote from a former member of staff (female) "Her ladyship rocks up in either spray on jeans or a skirt up her a5re and her t*ts out" :)
    see she weren't all bad.
  • Following the social media storm re the possible mass looting at Bexleyheath, these police officers were snapped on a steak out.


  • Truncheonmeat sandwich?
  • They’re the vice squad, sex and drugs and sausage rolls.
  • Following the social media storm re the possible mass looting at Bexleyheath, these police officers were snapped on a steak out.


    Surely a steak bake?
  • TBF my brother sent me that story and my response was, 'pigs in blankets?'  He replied it wasn't very PC.
  • Following the social media storm re the possible mass looting at Bexleyheath, these police officers were snapped on a steak out.


    No wonder they struggle with a Bleep Test a fat 12yr old could pass
  • What was that Monkees song...'The last train to idiotsville'
  • Chav on the train yesterday, realising he was on the wrong one and trying to get the guard to stop the train to let him off.

    "You gotz to do me a favour bruv... what do you mean no?  I gotta get to Dartford...."

    Yeah because they stop trains in extra places because you're an idiot.
    Poor guy, imagine being desperate to get to Dartford  :)
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  • Chav on the train yesterday, realising he was on the wrong one and trying to get the guard to stop the train to let him off.

    "You gotz to do me a favour bruv... what do you mean no?  I gotta get to Dartford...."

    Yeah because they stop trains in extra places because you're an idiot.
    As this is CL - here is some must know info:-

    There are about 150 railway request stops in the UK - alas none on the Bexleyheath line.  Dilton Marsh is probably the closest to London. 

    The station is the subject of the poem 'Dilton Marsh Halt' by John Betjeman:[3]

    Was it worth keeping the Halt open,
    We thought as we looked at the sky
    Red through the spread of the cedar-tree,
    With the evening train gone by?
    Yes, we said, for in summer the anglers use it,
    Two and sometimes three
    Will bring their catches of rods and poles and perches
    To Westbury, home for tea.
    There isn't a porter. The platform is made of sleepers.
    The guard of the last train puts out the light
    And high over lorries and cattle the Halt unwinking
    Waits through the Wiltshire night.
    O housewife safe in the comprehensive churning
    Of the Warminster launderette!
    O husband down at the depot with car in car-park!
    The Halt is waiting yet.
    And when all the horrible roads are finally done for,
    And there's no more petrol left in the world to burn,
    Here to the Halt from Salisbury and from Bristol
    Steam trains will return.

     (Perhaps if the guard recited this to our hapless passenger he'd get the picture).

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Railway_request_stops_in_Great_Britain
  • I read today that American research has concluded that beer goggles do not exist.

    Huh, research that I've carried out over many years would beg to differ!

  • That's a rare picture of Ayew standing up.
  • Jesse Lingard apparently pricing himself out of a move to Saudi Arabia.

    They're chucking money about - how much did he ask for?!
  • A few weeks ago I went to a HiFi show at Ascot. It was pretty much all of the things I could never afford but nice to see anyway, 50k turntables 80k speakers, amps the price of houses, really nice stuff.
    There was a guy there who's company sold 13 amp fuses that he admitted to me were in fact normal 13 amp fuses but he had cryogenically treated them, (stuck them in liquid nitrogen), polished the case  and then put his label on. He then sold these for £30 a pop. Apparently its a thing, the fuse is the choke point in your system.
    I thought this was a bit steep for a fuse you can buy in Sainsburys for a about 10p although its structure might not be a refined as one that the guy was plugging.

    So I wondered How much could you pay for a 13 A fuse, at which point I realised some people either have hearing like a bat, may be too much money, gullible or all three.
    Personally if fuse  mattered that much to me I'd make do with a few strands of silver wire and take a chance and then I found these.

    Have a look at this, I'd want to be able to at least see it;

    https://www.futureshop.co.uk/brands-category/quantum-science-audio/qsa-uk-13a-fuses?price=2285.00-8000.00




  • Angry people who still use “you absolute melt” on here.
    great stuff.
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  • A few weeks ago I went to a HiFi show at Ascot. It was pretty much all of the things I could never afford but nice to see anyway, 50k turntables 80k speakers, amps the price of houses, really nice stuff.
    There was a guy there who's company sold 13 amp fuses that he admitted to me were in fact normal 13 amp fuses but he had cryogenically treated them, (stuck them in liquid nitrogen), polished the case  and then put his label on. He then sold these for £30 a pop. Apparently its a thing, the fuse is the choke point in your system.
    I thought this was a bit steep for a fuse you can buy in Sainsburys for a about 10p although its structure might not be a refined as one that the guy was plugging.

    So I wondered How much could you pay for a 13 A fuse, at which point I realised some people either have hearing like a bat, may be too much money, gullible or all three.
    Personally if fuse  mattered that much to me I'd make do with a few strands of silver wire and take a chance and then I found these.

    Have a look at this, I'd want to be able to at least see it;

    https://www.futureshop.co.uk/brands-category/quantum-science-audio/qsa-uk-13a-fuses?price=2285.00-8000.00




    WTF…😮
  • A few weeks ago I went to a HiFi show at Ascot. It was pretty much all of the things I could never afford but nice to see anyway, 50k turntables 80k speakers, amps the price of houses, really nice stuff.
    There was a guy there who's company sold 13 amp fuses that he admitted to me were in fact normal 13 amp fuses but he had cryogenically treated them, (stuck them in liquid nitrogen), polished the case  and then put his label on. He then sold these for £30 a pop. Apparently its a thing, the fuse is the choke point in your system.
    I thought this was a bit steep for a fuse you can buy in Sainsburys for a about 10p although its structure might not be a refined as one that the guy was plugging.

    So I wondered How much could you pay for a 13 A fuse, at which point I realised some people either have hearing like a bat, may be too much money, gullible or all three.
    Personally if fuse  mattered that much to me I'd make do with a few strands of silver wire and take a chance and then I found these.

    Have a look at this, I'd want to be able to at least see it;

    https://www.futureshop.co.uk/brands-category/quantum-science-audio/qsa-uk-13a-fuses?price=2285.00-8000.00




    WTF…😮
    Too think i use to use a 1/4" bolt with the head cut off when my electric drill was blowing fuses.
  • IdleHans said:
    Topping up the olive oil (7 quid a bottle) that Mrs Idle insists on using, with sunflower oil (2 quid) when she's not looking. She hasn't noticed the difference yet and it's saving a bundle.
    Great story, but sorry your reference to Mrs Idle made me think of this.


  • Stumbled across this recently and it made me wonder how many of us are proper charlton and own a real time train board. Didn't realise spurs liked a choo choo aswell.



    You can purchase them here fellow train geeks.

    https://ukdepartureboards.co.uk/

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