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  • This friend is neither your relative nor your family, it seems. So, without further context, I'd be leaning toward going. 

    However, there are a few questions to consider:

    - Does your other half usually compromise in situations such as this? Equally, do you?

    - What does "
    Not majorly close friends by a long shot but chummy all the same" actually mean? The context here is key. If this was your gf's best mate then you go to the wedding, obviously. If she's her former accountant or some bollocks, then go football. In between the extremes is a judgement call.

    - How would you feel with a similar situation the other way round?

    - Do you know how important this wedding actually is to your missus?
  • edited May 2019
    By arguing, you're implying that you're open to compromise. Just tell her you're going to the football and let her sulk it out for a few days. Ask for her friends partners number and call him yourself to explain and most importantly, offer to pay for money they'll have lost on catering for you.

    And if we don't get to Wembey. Hide.
  • Currently having massive Whatsapp arguments with her regarding this. Can't wait to get home tonight.

    Send her a link to this thread in your next message
  • Currently having massive Whatsapp arguments with her regarding this. Can't wait to get home tonight.
    88 if you really don't want to go don't go.
    You don't need a big argument.
    Don't listen too much to the posts on here , you got to do what you want.
  • Currently having massive Whatsapp arguments with her regarding this. Can't wait to get home tonight.

    Send her a link to this thread in your next message
    More importantly send us the Argument so we can watch :)
    more importantly send us a picture of her sister
  • clb74 said:
    Currently having massive Whatsapp arguments with her regarding this. Can't wait to get home tonight.
    88 if you really don't want to go don't go.
    You don't need a big argument.
    Don't listen too much to the posts on here , you got to do what you want.
    Do what's in you heart 88. I highly doubt you'll get dumped for going to Wembley. You need to be true to yourself in life and whoever is with you needs to accept that. 
  • Does remind me when my Sister got married in 2010 though

    They knew my Charlton support was going to be an issue so got from me a list of dates when Charlton were at home so they knew which games to avoid - they then of course booked the Wedding on the weekend of the Leeds United game @ the Valley ... 1-0 win when Randolph made that cracking save at the end and so kept us in touch with the automatic spots

    Because they'd asked me dates and then booked on a Charlton home day I point blankly refused to attend the wedding so they were forced to move it a week - Got grief about it in the lead up to the wedding even got a snide remark in the Speeches

    Have always had the last laugh though as the original day of the wedding was bloody awful in terms of weather; the day that it was moved to (Exeter away) saw beautiful sunshine, the day doesnt get mentioned anymore because when it would be brought up I'd always remind them that it was thanks to me they had the nice day
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  • Huskaris said:
    Are you a season ticket holder who has been going all season or just going to a couple games here and there? Not that it makes you more or less of a fan in my eyes but it would strengthen your claim to be able to go to final, it's the conclusion of what you've been going to week in week out!

    Does your girlfriend have a lot of other friends there or will you be the only person she knows? If she knows a lot of people there I think that you not being there is nowhere near as much of a big deal. 
    Season ticket holder and she has loads of friends there going. Its all her friends. I'm just the other half.
  • Does remind me when my Sister got married in 2010 though

    They knew my Charlton support was going to be an issue so got from me a list of dates when Charlton were at home so they knew which games to avoid - they then of course booked the Wedding on the weekend of the Leeds United game @ the Valley ... 1-0 win when Randolph made that cracking save at the end and so kept us in touch with the automatic spots

    Because they'd asked me dates and then booked on a Charlton home day I point blankly refused to attend the wedding so they were forced to move it a week - Got grief about it in the lead up to the wedding even got a snide remark in the Speeches

    Have always had the last laugh though as the original day of the wedding was bloody awful in terms of weather; the day that it was moved to (Exeter away) saw beautiful sunshine, the day doesnt get mentioned anymore because when it would be brought up I'd always remind them that it was thanks to me they had the nice day
    Your sister had to run t her wedding dates through you.
    Your having a laugh.
  • Huskaris said:
    Are you a season ticket holder who has been going all season or just going to a couple games here and there? Not that it makes you more or less of a fan in my eyes but it would strengthen your claim to be able to go to final, it's the conclusion of what you've been going to week in week out!

    Does your girlfriend have a lot of other friends there or will you be the only person she knows? If she knows a lot of people there I think that you not being there is nowhere near as much of a big deal. 
    Season ticket holder and she has loads of friends there going. Its all her friends. I'm just the other half.
    Are you the only other half going out of her friends?
  • edited May 2019
    clb74 said:
    Does remind me when my Sister got married in 2010 though

    They knew my Charlton support was going to be an issue so got from me a list of dates when Charlton were at home so they knew which games to avoid - they then of course booked the Wedding on the weekend of the Leeds United game @ the Valley ... 1-0 win when Randolph made that cracking save at the end and so kept us in touch with the automatic spots

    Because they'd asked me dates and then booked on a Charlton home day I point blankly refused to attend the wedding so they were forced to move it a week - Got grief about it in the lead up to the wedding even got a snide remark in the Speeches

    Have always had the last laugh though as the original day of the wedding was bloody awful in terms of weather; the day that it was moved to (Exeter away) saw beautiful sunshine, the day doesnt get mentioned anymore because when it would be brought up I'd always remind them that it was thanks to me they had the nice day
    Your sister had to run t her wedding dates through you.
    Your having a laugh.
    Nope that is a 100% genuine story

    Correction though, she didnt have to check with me, she chose to...

    She then deliberately went and booked on a home game when she knew there was one so for me it she was booking on that date out of spite; had she booked her wedding with no knowledge of Charlton being at home I wouldnt have had issue

    i.e. I've missed games over the last few seasons (three this year alone) due to being on my Honeymoon, and have skipped games to take my wife up to work conferences whilst I've spent the day sitting in the car so am not the "selfish monster" I was nine years ago
  • Huskaris said:
    Are you a season ticket holder who has been going all season or just going to a couple games here and there? Not that it makes you more or less of a fan in my eyes but it would strengthen your claim to be able to go to final, it's the conclusion of what you've been going to week in week out!

    Does your girlfriend have a lot of other friends there or will you be the only person she knows? If she knows a lot of people there I think that you not being there is nowhere near as much of a big deal. 
    Season ticket holder and she has loads of friends there going. Its all her friends. I'm just the other half.
    Are you the only other half going out of her friends?
    No all the other halves are going. But all the other halves aren't Charlton fans lol
  • I've got to try not to be sexist here. And of course there are many women who are just as passionate about football as men, BUT.... Most women, whilst supportive of the passion we have in our lives do not understand it. And sadly, they never will. There is no way to avoid her being extremely cross with you for putting a silly game above a friend. Whatever you say, it will always be viewed in that context. 
  • I've got to try not to be sexist here. And of course there are many women who are just as passionate about football as men, BUT.... Most women, whilst supportive of the passion we have in our lives do not understand it. And sadly, they never will. There is no way to avoid her being extremely cross with you for putting a silly game above a friend. Whatever you say, it will always be viewed in that context. 
    I think its the same about anyone who isnt into Football or doesnt get how it is here in England (looking at you Roland)... One mate who hates the sport watched me go mental when I saw Paul Benson had scored a late winner @ Carlisle in a 4-3 win, he still winds me up when he says its just a game

    End of the day he'll have his interests he's passionate about; 88's missus will have her interests, its about respecting them, especially as this isnt a family wedding we're talking about
  • I found out (in 1987) that my sister was getting married on the same day as we played Everton (who won the league that year) away. I didn't get along with my sister (still don't), and hadn't for ten years or so, since she split from her first husband.  It was our mother who told/invited me to the wedding one evening.  I replied to my mum that I couldn't go, and she asked why?  I said I've been to my sister's wedding before, but I've never been to Goodison Park!

    Strictly, that was true, but I ended up going to the Full Member's Cup quarter final there a few weeks before the league game so by the time of the wedding, I had been to that ground.  Didn't make any difference to me though! We lost 2-1 by the way...and she's still married to the same bloke!

    As for your dilemna, go to Wembley.  If you don't, you will harbour way too much hate!
  • We had a Christening yesterday as well. With said friends. The Christening was at 2pm so had to miss the last 20 mins of yesterday's game also. 

    The other halves yesterday were all saying you've got to be there (Play off final). I didn't ask the Groom for his permission - thought that would of been taking the piss somewhat lol.
  • I have the same predicament - except that it's my mates wedding.

    I am working out if i can get to Wembley and back between speeches and the cake cutting. 

    I'm consoling myself that if i dont go, it'd be my luck that I'll miss the best win ever...
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  • Go on the piss the night before and don't come home, simples :smiley:
  • clb74 said:
    Does remind me when my Sister got married in 2010 though

    They knew my Charlton support was going to be an issue so got from me a list of dates when Charlton were at home so they knew which games to avoid - they then of course booked the Wedding on the weekend of the Leeds United game @ the Valley ... 1-0 win when Randolph made that cracking save at the end and so kept us in touch with the automatic spots

    Because they'd asked me dates and then booked on a Charlton home day I point blankly refused to attend the wedding so they were forced to move it a week - Got grief about it in the lead up to the wedding even got a snide remark in the Speeches

    Have always had the last laugh though as the original day of the wedding was bloody awful in terms of weather; the day that it was moved to (Exeter away) saw beautiful sunshine, the day doesnt get mentioned anymore because when it would be brought up I'd always remind them that it was thanks to me they had the nice day
    Your sister had to run t her wedding dates through you.
    Your having a laugh.
    Nope that is a 100% genuine story

    Correction though, she didnt have to check with me, she chose to...

    She then deliberately went and booked on a home game when she knew there was one so for me it she was booking on that date out of spite; had she booked her wedding with no knowledge of Charlton being at home I wouldnt have had issue

    i.e. I've missed games over the last few seasons (three this year alone) due to being on my Honeymoon, and have skipped games to take my wife up to work conferences whilst I've spent the day sitting in the car so am not the "selfish monster" I was nine years ago
    Wait a sec. 

    You refused to go to your sister's wedding because it clashed with a Charlton game.  And yet you went on honeymoon and missed Charlton games?  

    Isn't that a bit... inconsistent? 
  • edited May 2019
    I've got to try not to be sexist here. And of course there are many women who are just as passionate about football as men, BUT.... Most women, whilst supportive of the passion we have in our lives do not understand it. And sadly, they never will. There is no way to avoid her being extremely cross with you for putting a silly game above a friend. Whatever you say, it will always be viewed in that context. 
    I think its the same about anyone who isnt into Football or doesnt get how it is here in England (looking at you Roland)... One mate who hates the sport watched me go mental when I saw Paul Benson had scored a late winner @ Carlisle in a 4-3 win, he still winds me up when he says its just a game

    End of the day he'll have his interests he's passionate about; 88's missus will have her interests, its about respecting them, especially as this isnt a family wedding we're talking about
    Very true - it is just our other halves are women for the most part. I'm sure there are football mad women who might have male partners who are not so into football. They will humour us football fans, but there will always be things, and quite a lot of them, that are more important than football. What they don't understand is that in our worlds this isn't the case.
  • luckily me and mrs were invited to a wedding the weekend of play off final but we sacked it off as it was too pricey and a lot of messing about ( wedding was in tuscany and involved car hire etc ) so am now free for the weekend. 

    to put it into context though it is a league 1 play off final and not a premier league one so they arent compariable even still its a chance for the reds at wembley.
  • Chizz said:
    clb74 said:
    Does remind me when my Sister got married in 2010 though

    They knew my Charlton support was going to be an issue so got from me a list of dates when Charlton were at home so they knew which games to avoid - they then of course booked the Wedding on the weekend of the Leeds United game @ the Valley ... 1-0 win when Randolph made that cracking save at the end and so kept us in touch with the automatic spots

    Because they'd asked me dates and then booked on a Charlton home day I point blankly refused to attend the wedding so they were forced to move it a week - Got grief about it in the lead up to the wedding even got a snide remark in the Speeches

    Have always had the last laugh though as the original day of the wedding was bloody awful in terms of weather; the day that it was moved to (Exeter away) saw beautiful sunshine, the day doesnt get mentioned anymore because when it would be brought up I'd always remind them that it was thanks to me they had the nice day
    Your sister had to run t her wedding dates through you.
    Your having a laugh.
    Nope that is a 100% genuine story

    Correction though, she didnt have to check with me, she chose to...

    She then deliberately went and booked on a home game when she knew there was one so for me it she was booking on that date out of spite; had she booked her wedding with no knowledge of Charlton being at home I wouldnt have had issue

    i.e. I've missed games over the last few seasons (three this year alone) due to being on my Honeymoon, and have skipped games to take my wife up to work conferences whilst I've spent the day sitting in the car so am not the "selfish monster" I was nine years ago
    Wait a sec. 

    You refused to go to your sister's wedding because it clashed with a Charlton game.  And yet you went on honeymoon and missed Charlton games?  

    Isn't that a bit... inconsistent? 
    Me too. I guess it's because I hate my sister and love my wife.... I didn't miss many games back in the eighties, but the last twenty years or so have seen priorities change.  Not having a season ticket (thanks Roland!) has made it easier to be cavalier!
  • edited May 2019
    What did the groom think of u being on the honeymoon ?
  • We had a Christening yesterday as well. With said friends. The Christening was at 2pm so had to miss the last 20 mins of yesterday's game also. 

    The other halves yesterday were all saying you've got to be there (Play off final). I didn't ask the Groom for his permission - thought that would of been taking the piss somewhat lol.
    Game changer. If we get to the final then you're sacking the wedding off.
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