So after having the old chop, how long was it before you are ‘back in operation’’ under the covers, shall we say?
I had to 'empty myself' 20 times, before another sample was provided to them. They could then confirm that the hot water supply had been turned off permanently.
In fact I booked it the day after I found out that Mrs Holyjo was pregnant with our third child , unplanned in every way I might add.
My friend Shane had previously had one ( He was/is heavily into the S and M scene and later lived as a slave in a dungeon in Crouch End , eating out of a dog bowl under the pseudonym Rex the Puppy) and I had taken him. Post op I drove him to the pub, for a few sherberts. and then took him home. As a slight aside he used the opportunity to raise money for red nose day and had a few photos taken. I later did a religious devotion at an event which jokingly used the verse from Deuteronomy in the Old Testament about no man being able to enter the holy of holies with a crushed testicle. I used the photo of my mate Shane on the trolley with his red nose as part of the devotion. I learnt that day in no uncertain terms what it feels like to "split a room".
My vasectomy was largely uneventful. Two brief noteworthy points. A penis being approached by a soldering iron , has independent thought to its host body. My own retracted into my body which to be perfectly honest was the exact opposite of what I had hoped might happen. Secondly , the smell of your own scrotum burning is to say the least unsavoury and not one I wish to experience again.
Anyways , I drank the Guiness as per Shanes and my pact and settled in at home for recovery. It might be worth pointing out at this stage that I was wearing my wifes underwear. At that time I was prone to wearing baggy boxers which are not what one wants or needs post someone attacking your Niagras with a burning hot implement, and so I took the advice of the nurse and for a few days agreed to wear my wifes knickers. There perhaps ought to be a separate thread on wearing ladies underwear , particularly as someone not prone to tranvestiteism ( Is that even a word)
Two days later I noticed a puss like substance on my scrote which prompted me to visit the Doctor. The doctor took one look and suggested to me that we needed " to get a grip" of the infection in no uncertain terms and prescribed enough antibiotics to fell a horse. He was adamant I should take two as soon as I had them , two in the evening, two more before I went to bed , two in the morning two the following lunchtime ...... you get the picture.
I followed his advice and imagined things would settle down in the next few days.
The following day I found myself casually reading the insert information from the pack of Antibiotics. I was mildly confused as they referred to depression a number of times , bulimia and other such things which from my layman's perspective had little or nothing to do with my ball bag and its infection. I decided to ring my cousin Dan who is a pharmacist. I explained the situation , and he understandably asked for the name of the drug on the packet. Fluoxetine I proffered ......... silence following by muffled laughter , followed by outright mirth and convulsions followed.
"You my friend have just taken 16 Prozac in just over 24 hours" Dan said still pissing himself at the other end of the phone. "Oh " I said, is that a problem,
Although I had taken time of work , a colleague of mine was being cremated in Dagenham and as the leader of the organisation I was not going to miss being there for a final goodbye. That said I had not anticipated when I made those plans that I would be out of my box with an OD of Prozac , akin to a Mescalin hit , wearing my wifes underwear and wanting to laugh uncontrollably during the service of remembrance . But Hey Ho , flexibility is my middle name and I survived the ordeal.
As I did the come down ! . Two day later standing in front of a full length mirror in a pair of my wifes best undies , in a virtual comotise depressive state I allowed myself a period of significant self pity
Moral of the story - check your prescription medicines, and only where your wifes underwear in the most extreme of circumstances !
So after having the old chop, how long was it before you are ‘back in operation’’ under the covers, shall we say?
Had mine on a Thursday, Friday off and back to work on light duties Monday. My sack swelled to the size of a pelican tennis ball but no problems other than that.
Funniest thing was the GP appointment to request the procedure, I walked into the room and there was a young, most attractive female GP I've ever seen.
A lot of gallows humour on this thread. I'm very certain in my own mind that having your gonads ripped open and then burnt with an iron is nothing short of medieval torture. It must hurt.
RodneyCharltonTrotta - I can recommend getting it done here... https://www.mariestopes.org.uk/other-services/vasectomy/ It's a doddle and nothing to worry about. In and out in twenty minutes and you will be unlucky if you feel much more than a bit of discomfort for a day or two and until the small wound heals.
RodneyCharltonTrotta - I can recommend getting it done here... https://www.mariestopes.org.uk/other-services/vasectomy/ It's a doddle and nothing to worry about. In and out in twenty minutes and you will be unlucky if you feel much more than a bit of discomfort for a day or two and until the small wound heals.
Thanks very much mate. Gonna try gp again for financial reasons but will likely give these a go if can't go NHS route.
Noticed an advert for them in the gents at the valley on Saturday funnily enough so must be a sign!
RodneyCharltonTrotta - I can recommend getting it done here... https://www.mariestopes.org.uk/other-services/vasectomy/ It's a doddle and nothing to worry about. In and out in twenty minutes and you will be unlucky if you feel much more than a bit of discomfort for a day or two and until the small wound heals.
All done Friday. Testicles have retreated into my lower abdomen like a couple of nervous kittens hiding behind a settee and are refusing to budge with no amount of coaxing seemingly solving the issue. Because the surgeon has bandaged the scrotum so tightly I can't manoeuvre them back in place as it's akin to trying to get your tent back into it's tent bag after a 4 day bender at Glastonbury whilst still pissed.
Nurse said this might happen and if that's the case then to "milk them out" whatever the feck that means. Not gonna force the issue as will take the bandages off tonight as will be 48 hours since the op and hopefully they'll slot back down nicely assuming that my ball bag hasn't turned black and immediately fall off due to the restricted blood supply the unnecessarily tight tourniquet that was applied.
Missus cleared off for the weekend with the children to allow me to recuperate but having the house to myself for 2 whole days but not being able to fully enjoy the privacy and internet has been a challenge and rocked me to my very core.
Haven't noticed any changes in my manhood yet but still early days. Right, off now as Real Housewives is on and I want to get down to Laura Ashleys for a lovely pair of patterned drapes I've spotted that will will set off the living room.
Cheers again for all the advice and insight. It was the bollocks.
I wouldn’t believe the nurse mate, if your testicles haven’t returned yet, they’re never coming back.
“Milking them out” (it’s too late now) is the medical term for your wife sitting on a stool in front of you, dressed in a milk maid’s outfit, grabbing the ends of your sack and pulling at it in an up and down motion with her hands, whilst mooing.
The only option left open to you is to ‘transition’ otherwise you’re going to look ridiculous for the rest of your life.
I wouldn’t believe the nurse mate, if your testicles haven’t returned yet, they’re never coming back.
“Mailing them out” (it’s too late now) is the medical term for your wife sitting on a stool in front of you, dressed in a milk maid’s outfit, grabbing the ends of your sack and pulling at it in an up and down motion with her hands, whilst mooing.
The only option left open to you is to ‘transition’ otherwise you’re going to look ridiculous for the rest of your life.
I wouldn’t believe the nurse mate, if your testicles haven’t returned yet, they’re never coming back.
“Milking them out” (it’s too late now) is the medical term for your wife sitting on a stool in front of you, dressed in a milk maid’s outfit, grabbing the ends of your sack and pulling at it in an up and down motion with her hands, whilst mooing.
The only option left open to you is to ‘transition’ otherwise you’re going to look ridiculous for the rest of your life.
Not sure his wife sitting on a turd is going to work.
All done Friday. Testicles have retreated into my lower abdomen like a couple of nervous kittens hiding behind a settee and are refusing to budge with no amount of coaxing seemingly solving the issue. Because the surgeon has bandaged the scrotum so tightly I can't manoeuvre them back in place as it's akin to trying to get your tent back into it's tent bag after a 4 day bender at Glastonbury whilst still pissed.
Nurse said this might happen and if that's the case then to "milk them out" whatever the feck that means. Not gonna force the issue as will take the bandages off tonight as will be 48 hours since the op and hopefully they'll slot back down nicely assuming that my ball bag hasn't turned black and immediately fall off due to the restricted blood supply the unnecessarily tight tourniquet that was applied.
Missus cleared off for the weekend with the children to allow me to recuperate but having the house to myself for 2 whole days but not being able to fully enjoy the privacy and internet has been a challenge and rocked me to my very core.
Haven't noticed any changes in my manhood yet but still early days. Right, off now as Real Housewives is on and I want to get down to Laura Ashleys for a lovely pair of patterned drapes I've spotted that will will set off the living room.
Cheers again for all the advice and insight. It was the bollocks.
When I had mine done I walked out the clinic and drove home, the only difference being the numbness from the anesthetic. Not a bandage or plaster in sight.
When I had mine done I walked out the clinic and drove home, the only difference being the numbness from the anesthetic. Not a bandage or plaster in sight.
Comments
Thankfully just had the news that my second one has worked....officially ‘firing blanks’ now
They could then confirm that the hot water supply had been turned off permanently.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=v-zfW9rzOOg
In fact I booked it the day after I found out that Mrs Holyjo was pregnant with our third child , unplanned in every way I might add.
My friend Shane had previously had one ( He was/is heavily into the S and M scene and later lived as a slave in a dungeon in Crouch End , eating out of a dog bowl under the pseudonym Rex the Puppy) and I had taken him. Post op I drove him to the pub, for a few sherberts. and then took him home. As a slight aside he used the opportunity to raise money for red nose day and had a few photos taken. I later did a religious devotion at an event which jokingly used the verse from Deuteronomy in the Old Testament about no man being able to enter the holy of holies with a crushed testicle. I used the photo of my mate Shane on the trolley with his red nose as part of the devotion. I learnt that day in no uncertain terms what it feels like to "split a room".
My vasectomy was largely uneventful. Two brief noteworthy points. A penis being approached by a soldering iron , has independent thought to its host body. My own retracted into my body which to be perfectly honest was the exact opposite of what I had hoped might happen. Secondly , the smell of your own scrotum burning is to say the least unsavoury and not one I wish to experience again.
Anyways , I drank the Guiness as per Shanes and my pact and settled in at home for recovery. It might be worth pointing out at this stage that I was wearing my wifes underwear. At that time I was prone to wearing baggy boxers which are not what one wants or needs post someone attacking your Niagras with a burning hot implement, and so I took the advice of the nurse and for a few days agreed to wear my wifes knickers. There perhaps ought to be a separate thread on wearing ladies underwear , particularly as someone not prone to tranvestiteism ( Is that even a word)
Two days later I noticed a puss like substance on my scrote which prompted me to visit the Doctor. The doctor took one look and suggested to me that we needed " to get a grip" of the infection in no uncertain terms and prescribed enough antibiotics to fell a horse. He was adamant I should take two as soon as I had them , two in the evening, two more before I went to bed , two in the morning two the following lunchtime ...... you get the picture.
I followed his advice and imagined things would settle down in the next few days.
The following day I found myself casually reading the insert information from the pack of Antibiotics. I was mildly confused as they referred to depression a number of times , bulimia and other such things which from my layman's perspective had little or nothing to do with my ball bag and its infection. I decided to ring my cousin Dan who is a pharmacist. I explained the situation , and he understandably asked for the name of the drug on the packet. Fluoxetine I proffered ......... silence following by muffled laughter , followed by outright mirth and convulsions followed.
"You my friend have just taken 16 Prozac in just over 24 hours" Dan said still pissing himself at the other end of the phone. "Oh " I said, is that a problem,
Although I had taken time of work , a colleague of mine was being cremated in Dagenham and as the leader of the organisation I was not going to miss being there for a final goodbye. That said I had not anticipated when I made those plans that I would be out of my box with an OD of Prozac , akin to a Mescalin hit , wearing my wifes underwear and wanting to laugh uncontrollably during the service of remembrance . But Hey Ho , flexibility is my middle name and I survived the ordeal.
As I did the come down ! . Two day later standing in front of a full length mirror in a pair of my wifes best undies , in a virtual comotise depressive state I allowed myself a period of significant self pity
Moral of the story - check your prescription medicines, and only where your wifes underwear in the most extreme of circumstances !
Funniest thing was the GP appointment to request the procedure, I walked into the room and there was a young, most attractive female GP I've ever seen.
I'm very certain in my own mind that having your gonads ripped open and then burnt with an iron is nothing short of medieval torture. It must hurt.
https://www.mariestopes.org.uk/other-services/vasectomy/
It's a doddle and nothing to worry about. In and out in twenty minutes and you will be unlucky if you feel much more than a bit of discomfort for a day or two and until the small wound heals.
Noticed an advert for them in the gents at the valley on Saturday funnily enough so must be a sign!
Nurse said this might happen and if that's the case then to "milk them out" whatever the feck that means. Not gonna force the issue as will take the bandages off tonight as will be 48 hours since the op and hopefully they'll slot back down nicely assuming that my ball bag hasn't turned black and immediately fall off due to the restricted blood supply the unnecessarily tight tourniquet that was applied.
Missus cleared off for the weekend with the children to allow me to recuperate but having the house to myself for 2 whole days but not being able to fully enjoy the privacy and internet has been a challenge and rocked me to my very core.
Haven't noticed any changes in my manhood yet but still early days. Right, off now as Real Housewives is on and I want to get down to Laura Ashleys for a lovely pair of patterned drapes I've spotted that will will set off the living room.
Cheers again for all the advice and insight. It was the bollocks.
“Milking them out” (it’s too late now) is the medical term for your wife sitting on a stool in front of you, dressed in a milk maid’s outfit, grabbing the ends of your sack and pulling at it in an up and down motion with her hands, whilst mooing.
The only option left open to you is to ‘transition’ otherwise you’re going to look ridiculous for the rest of your life.
I believe if you press gently above where your balls are you can gently "push" / guide them back down.
Good luck.
When I had mine done I walked out the clinic and drove home, the only difference being the numbness from the anesthetic. Not a bandage or plaster in sight.
Glad all is well RCT.
** Replace bacon with lettuce if you are a regular on the Vegan thread