A man got a job as a zookeeper, on his first day at the zoo he was walking past the aviary when he saw a beautiful finch. He reached into the cage and caught the bird to give it a stroke. Unfortunately he squeezed too hard and killed the bird. In a panic he threw the dead bird into the lions cage to get rid of the evidence. As he was walking away he accidentally knocked over the Bee hive exhibit. The hive crashed to the ground and the bees began to swarm out. In a panic he stomped all over the hive and killed the bees then threw the lot over the wall into the lions cage. As he walked past the Monkey cage he turned to see all the monkeys taking the Mickey out of him. He flew into a rage and entered the monkey cage and punched the first monkey he saw, killing him outright. In a panic now he also threw the monkey's body over into the lions cage. The next day the zoo introduced a new lion to the lion enclosure. The lion walked up to the leader of the pack an old and wise lion and said "Hi mate, I'm new, just got here from Africa, what's this place like then?" "It's all right here mate" said the old lion. "What's the food like then?" said the newcomer. "Not too bad" said the old lion "Last night I had finch, chimps and mushy bees!"
I haven't got time to read the thread, but has anyone spotted that for the first time on Saturday they literally halved the size of the container and the portion offered previously. That's it for me, I will bring my own food rather than be ripped off.
I haven't got time to read the thread, but has anyone spotted that for the first time on Saturday they literally halved the size of the container and the portion offered previously. That's it for me, I will bring my own food rather than be ripped off.
I haven't got time to read the thread, but has anyone spotted that for the first time on Saturday they literally halved the size of the container and the portion offered previously. That's it for me, I will bring my own food rather than be ripped off.
I haven't got time to read the thread, but has anyone spotted that for the first time on Saturday they literally halved the size of the container and the portion offered previously. That's it for me, I will bring my own food rather than be ripped off.
Did you count how many chips granpa? There's a few on here that would actually be interested to know.
Well sod your 14 chips I only got 3 poxy smallest fecking jersey royal spuds with a sparrow sized chicken breast and a spit full of gravy on Sunday at the poty do,
Even fat rob who ain't fat no more was still hungry
Well sod your 14 chips I only got 3 poxy smallest fecking jersey royal spuds with a sparrow sized chicken breast and a spit full of gravy on Sunday at the poty do,
Even fat rob who ain't fat no more was still hungry
Please tell me you're joking & you weren't there on Sunday, NLA !!!!!
Fanny, sorry mate, I was at the POTY as you know, and I have to say the food, errm, left a lot to be desired. I know how hard you worked, and it seems rather churlish to mention it, but for the money (others) paid I was thinking a top of the range Waitrose sandwich, a Waitrose bears claw pastry, and a salad tub, with a Cafe Nero coffee would've cost £9 maximum and would've been 100% nicer nosh. BTW the chips in Charlton Village are the best locally but used to be better, but you get about 50 for a kids portion costing £1.20.
Comments
Thanks to you this has been in my head since you posted
Any more and I would feel I was being a salt ed.
A man got a job as a zookeeper, on his first day at the zoo he was walking past the aviary when he saw a beautiful finch. He reached into the cage and caught the bird to give it a stroke. Unfortunately he squeezed too hard and killed the bird. In a panic he threw the dead bird into the lions cage to get rid of the evidence. As he was walking away he accidentally knocked over the Bee hive exhibit. The hive crashed to the ground and the bees began to swarm out. In a panic he stomped all over the hive and killed the bees then threw the lot over the wall into the lions cage. As he walked past the Monkey cage he turned to see all the monkeys taking the Mickey out of him. He flew into a rage and entered the monkey cage and punched the first monkey he saw, killing him outright. In a panic now he also threw the monkey's body over into the lions cage.
The next day the zoo introduced a new lion to the lion enclosure. The lion walked up to the leader of the pack an old and wise lion and said "Hi mate, I'm new, just got here from Africa, what's this place like then?"
"It's all right here mate" said the old lion. "What's the food like then?" said the newcomer.
"Not too bad" said the old lion "Last night I had finch, chimps and mushy bees!"
Even fat rob who ain't fat no more was still hungry
BTW the chips in Charlton Village are the best locally but used to be better, but you get about 50 for a kids portion costing £1.20.
No, I just looked at the smaller portions being served and I said ' you've had your chips mate '.
Have we done the 'too many people with chips on their shoulder' gag yet?