Southeastern train disruption (franchise to be taken over by Govt p191)
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Or you could have uttered the worlds of brick top in Snatch (apt film considering the part of the anatomy you mention)cafcdave123 said:
Next time she does it just calmly stand up give her a look to let her know that's you got up to move and toe punt her square in the cunt!cantersaddick said:Another thing why does this woman feel the need spray perfume all over herself after she has got on the train!? I mean seriously she fills the carriage with a cloud of the stuff every day.. half the carriage starts coughing and she doesn't even realise. It's like come on!! Maybe wait until you aren't in an enclosed space with loads of strangers..
Some of us have asthma!!
Do you know what "nemesis" means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by an 'orrible c@@t... me......2 -
So she sits like a "man spreader" too @Sillybilly??Sillybilly said:And this mornings thrilling instalment is a broken down train on the sidcup line which is causing a stack up with diverted trains on the bexleyheath line. Oh well, at least this morning im sitting next to a charming lady with war paint suitably applied before leaving home. And jolly nice she looks too.
I could make this a daily series if there is any appetite? A bit like @Cabbles (sorely missed) daily missives to his beloved Daisy. Need to think of a title. "the daily growler". "Great makeup mistakes of our time". Ho hum
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We will nowcantersaddick said:There is one upside to South Easterns incompetence. The days when I fancy a lay in or cba to get out of bed I can just ring the boss and say "trains are fucked I'll work from home today" and no one bothers to check!
*cantersaddick's boss*7 -
oi, that's my Nan you're talking about.cafcdave123 said:
Next time she does it just calmly stand up give her a look to let her know that's you got up to move and toe punt her square in the cunt!cantersaddick said:Another thing why does this woman feel the need spray perfume all over herself after she has got on the train!? I mean seriously she fills the carriage with a cloud of the stuff every day.. half the carriage starts coughing and she doesn't even realise. It's like come on!! Maybe wait until you aren't in an enclosed space with loads of strangers..
Some of us have asthma!!3 -
Next time she does it, start coughing and spluttering, gently at first and then more and more violently, until the spluttering becomes wretching and you're lying on the floor writhing in agony, and people around you are saying things like "blimey, I think this bloke's dying". Just as you slip into (pretend) unconsciousness, use the last strength you have left to point at her, so that nobody is left in any doubt as to who is responsible for you nearly dying.cantersaddick said:Another thing why does this woman feel the need spray perfume all over herself after she has got on the train!? I mean seriously she fills the carriage with a cloud of the stuff every day.. half the carriage starts coughing and she doesn't even realise. It's like come on!! Maybe wait until you aren't in an enclosed space with loads of strangers..
Some of us have asthma!!
Not only will you never have to deal with her perfume pollution again, you'll never even see her again because she'll be too ashamed to get on the same train in the morning. Also, you should receive some assistance from one of the witless goons who works for South Eastern - ask them to phone your work and tell them that you won't be at work today as someone attacked you on the train, should get you at least a couple of days off work (try and pick a week when there's plenty of sport on the telly).9 -
My boss is a villa fan.addick1965 said:
We will nowcantersaddick said:There is one upside to South Easterns incompetence. The days when I fancy a lay in or cba to get out of bed I can just ring the boss and say "trains are fucked I'll work from home today" and no one bothers to check!
*cantersaddick's boss*0 -
(1) Dont mention it on CharltonLife if you do this, some bloke who posts here will no doubt be on the train behind and will be posting on here at the same time complaining that their train has been delayed due to some idiot going ill.MrLargo said:
Next time she does it, start coughing and spluttering, gently at first and then more and more violently, until the spluttering becomes wretching and you're lying on the floor writhing in agony, and people around you are saying things like "blimey, I think this bloke's dying". Just as you slip into (pretend) unconsciousness, use the last strength you have left to point at her, so that nobody is left in any doubt as to who is responsible for you nearly dying.cantersaddick said:Another thing why does this woman feel the need spray perfume all over herself after she has got on the train!? I mean seriously she fills the carriage with a cloud of the stuff every day.. half the carriage starts coughing and she doesn't even realise. It's like come on!! Maybe wait until you aren't in an enclosed space with loads of strangers..
Some of us have asthma!!
Not only will you never have to deal with her perfume pollution again, you'll never even see her again because she'll be too ashamed to get on the same train in the morning. Also, you should receive some assistance from one of the witless goons who works for South Eastern - ask them to phone your work and tell them that you won't be at work today as someone attacked you on the train, should get you at least a couple of days off work (try and pick a week when there's plenty of sport on the telly).
(2) No way are people going to say things like... "Blimey, I think this bloke's dying", instead it'll be... "Excuse me but could you stop spreading germs so loudly, I cant hear my music above your ghastly (If its the Sidcup Line) 'orrible (If its Bexleyheath line) noise.8 -
It looks as though the Dartford line will be running normally on Saturday 15th for only about the fo Saturday this season. If one thing has pissed me off more than the crap football, it is having to use rail replacement buses or drive to Charlton to suffer it.1
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Or....cantersaddick said:Another thing why does this woman feel the need spray perfume all over herself after she has got on the train!? I mean seriously she fills the carriage with a cloud of the stuff every day.. half the carriage starts coughing and she doesn't even realise. It's like come on!! Maybe wait until you aren't in an enclosed space with loads of strangers..
Some of us have asthma!!
Next time she does it, slowly unzip your flies, take your dinkle out and start stroking it, whilst taking in big sniffs of her fragrance and weeping that it's the same perfume your ex wife wore before you brutally murdered her and buried her headless body under the garden patio.9 -
I like thisValleyGary said:
Or....cantersaddick said:Another thing why does this woman feel the need spray perfume all over herself after she has got on the train!? I mean seriously she fills the carriage with a cloud of the stuff every day.. half the carriage starts coughing and she doesn't even realise. It's like come on!! Maybe wait until you aren't in an enclosed space with loads of strangers..
Some of us have asthma!!
Next time she does it, slowly unzip your flies, take your dinkle out and start stroking it, whilst taking in big sniffs of her fragrance and weeping that it's the same perfume your ex wife wore before you brutally murdered her and buried her headless body under the garden patio.
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Don't listen to him Canters, it won't do you any good, believe me.ValleyGary said:
Or....cantersaddick said:Another thing why does this woman feel the need spray perfume all over herself after she has got on the train!? I mean seriously she fills the carriage with a cloud of the stuff every day.. half the carriage starts coughing and she doesn't even realise. It's like come on!! Maybe wait until you aren't in an enclosed space with loads of strangers..
Some of us have asthma!!
Next time she does it, slowly unzip your flies, take your dinkle out and start stroking it, whilst taking in big sniffs of her fragrance7 -
Have you checked Saturday 16th? Or are you looking at Friday 15th. Trains get to Charlton from Victoria this Saturday, which is dreadful for me.CAFCspooney said:It looks as though the Dartford line will be running normally on Saturday 15th for only about the fo Saturday this season. If one thing has pissed me off more than the crap football, it is having to use rail replacement buses or drive to Charlton to suffer it.
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Worse for those of us in Kent. It takes a rail replacement bust to Meopham, train (slow) to Victoria. Then train to Lewisham and another to Charlton. I make that over 2 and a half hours from Chatham to Charlton when it should be 40 mins..HantsAddick said:
Have you checked Saturday 16th? Or are you looking at Friday 15th. Trains get to Charlton from Victoria this Saturday, which is dreadful for me.CAFCspooney said:It looks as though the Dartford line will be running normally on Saturday 15th for only about the fo Saturday this season. If one thing has pissed me off more than the crap football, it is having to use rail replacement buses or drive to Charlton to suffer it.
Shambles..
Tempted to not bloody bother .0 -
It must get on your titscantersaddick said:
Worse for those of us in Kent. It takes a rail replacement bust to Meopham, train (slow) to Victoria. Then train to Lewisham and another to Charlton. I make that over 2 and a half hours from Chatham to Charlton when it should be 40 mins..HantsAddick said:
Have you checked Saturday 16th? Or are you looking at Friday 15th. Trains get to Charlton from Victoria this Saturday, which is dreadful for me.CAFCspooney said:It looks as though the Dartford line will be running normally on Saturday 15th for only about the fo Saturday this season. If one thing has pissed me off more than the crap football, it is having to use rail replacement buses or drive to Charlton to suffer it.
Shambles..
Tempted to not bloody bother .6 -
This is fast becoming my favourite thread. I live a good complain.1
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On the bexleyheath line. Just been informed by the driver that "it's going to be a slowone today". Didn't catch the reason as I have earphones in. As for the Daily Growler. Watch this space I am as yet unaccompanied. Maybe the Eltham face painter or the Blackheath bunny boiler. We'll see. At least the beardy weardy window closer from bexleyheath has a day off today so I have some fresh air.0
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Update (but not the one you're waiting for!). It's a broken down train on the sidcup line so everything diverted down bexleyheath line. Hardly anyone on the train this morning. Wierd (meaning weird). Still solo so no growler update.3
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Effing rubbish line during the very slow London Bridge is redevelopment.
For me lucky going into Cannon Street I currently have twice as many trains to aim for but every single one both in and out of cannon street is late.
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They probably have special dispensation during the London bridge works and are taking advantage of it.0
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Am at Lewisham and they've just announced that the next train due in (thankfully not mine) has been miss-routed by a signalman and has by passed the station. You would think the incompetent fuck wits would at least give the excuse as an "operational issue" rather than the truth to make them look less idiotic.1
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Maybe that's what they have done. Dread to think what the actual truth may have been..DaveMehmet said:Am at Lewisham and they've just announced that the next train due in (thankfully not mine) has been miss-routed by a signalman and has by passed the station. You would think the incompetent fuck wits would at least give the excuse as an "operational issue" rather than the truth to make them look less idiotic.
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Just a quick reminder!
The signalman works for Network Rail which is owned and controlled by the government. Nothing at all to do with South Eastern.0 -
Phew, that's OK then. That must make the stranded souls at Lewisham feel so much better.STEVEREEVE said:Just a quick reminder!
The signalman works for Network Rail which is owned and controlled by the government. Nothing at all to do with South Eastern.
So, who makes the announcements then?0 -
Trains only running from Plumstead again on Saturday, I thought last week was too good to be true.0
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Absolutely nothing from Chatham to London today. Delayed delayed delayed cancelled.. bloody brilliant.. been waiting 40 mins already.0
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Points failure at Charlton.cantersaddick said:Absolutely nothing from Chatham to London today. Delayed delayed delayed cancelled.. bloody brilliant.. been waiting 40 mins already.
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Having a mercifully ordinary day. Train on time and sitting next to a nice chap who's reading a book and being careful not to squash into my space. No daily growler to report. Sorry.1
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My train pulled into New Eltham this morning with smoke billowing from underneath it.The smoke stopped and the train sat there for 25 mins then we all got kicked off.0
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Not bad that.addick1965 said:My train pulled into New Eltham this morning with smoke billowing from underneath it.The smoke stopped and the train sat there for 25 mins then we all got kicked off.
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Yeah,it made a changeiamdan said:
Not bad that.addick1965 said:My train pulled into New Eltham this morning with smoke billowing from underneath it.The smoke stopped and the train sat there for 25 mins then we all got kicked off.
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