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Your best tale from the terraces

Late 70's v West Ham FA Cup
In the covered end and it was packed. I had been talking to a man standing next to me for a while did not mention the fact that I supported Charlton. Just things like we are going to win tonight etc. I was about 13 at the time
Killer out of no where shot at goal and hit the crossbar, our hands went up and the man standing next to me punched me in the face. To add insult to injury the Police came charging up and removed me to the pen at the far end of the ground until well after the game. Think we lost 1-0 but not sure
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Comments

  • Best shout ive ever heard at the Valley was when it was deadly quiet (shock) and someone came out with "Will somebody tackle somebody".

    UEFA A coaching badge right there.
  • Best shout ive ever heard at the Valley was when it was deadly quiet (shock) and someone came out with "Will somebody tackle somebody".

    UEFA A coaching badge right there.

    Think that was Pardew.....

  • My personal favourite. When I was a kid in the old covered end (mid 90's version). The ball rolled over to the wheelchair area, someone jumped out of his chair to get the ball, then realised what he'd done and sheepishly sat back down again. Should've made a note to self, if he's going to scam a freebie don't forget to stay in your seat!
  • One of the funiest things I saw was QPR away in the 89/90 relegation season (think that was the season anyway, Mortimer got the winner in a 1-0 win?) Some young kid was at the front of the terrace and stamped on an unopened tomato sauce sachet - it split open and the sauce shot out about 15 yards along the terrace and straight up some geezers leg - He was far from happy.
  • I always remember soon after Pardew joined as a player he was having a bad game and someone called out "Pardew I seen nothing to make me think you are worth nothing just go!"
  • Dagenham away in the cup replay. Daggers fans singing Charlton give us a song. @riscardo shouts I'll give you a f**cking song and launches into the full version of Whitney Houston's the greatest love of all.

    Stockport away (Hunt Hattrick) young steward pulled into the crowd over the fence when the 3rd goal went in.
  • Dagenham away in the cup replay. Daggers fans singing Charlton give us a song. @riscardo shouts I'll give you a f**cking song and launches into the full version of Whitney Houston's the greatest love of all.

    Stockport away (Hunt Hattrick) young steward pulled into the crowd over the fence when the 3rd goal went in.

    Both were classics. The Stockport incident still makes me laugh now.
  • Two stories:

    Port Vale away, October 1990, both involve people no longer with us. With Charlton Trailing 1-0 to a goal from Darren Beckford and with six minutes to go, Rob Lee is fouled by Colin Gibson and referee Reed gives a penalty. Up steps Tommy Caton (RIP) and smashes it in. I remember there was mayhem behind the goal with Addicks going wild. Though I was lost in delirium, I could hear a voice beside me. An old friend called Brian, who may of you may remember and who died from cancer at just 38 and was a bit of a statto announced excitedly "that's the seventh penalty that Port Vale have conceded in the last ten games." Good stat, terrible timing. For some reason, it had the immediate effect of instantly ceasing the celebrations as we struggled to digest this momentous fact.

    Second story and just a couple of months later during that classic 4-4 at Portman Road. After trailing 2-0. Andy Peake pulled one back and then just after the hour, the demi God that was Paul Mortimer equalised. More unbridled joy behind the goal rendered surreal by Morty's apparent desire to come on to the terraces and join the fans. Trouble is he couldn't unfasten the lock on the gate to get in. So we had the bizarre sight of a player struggling to unlock the gate and several fans on the other side also befuddled by the locking mechanisms. I do enjoy these odd moments that bring us crashing back down to earth after a goal.
  • Colchester away (cup) when the wooden terracing gave way.
    One minute talking to someone alongside me, next minute all i see is his head and shoulders sticking out the terrace.
  • Mate getting head butted by old bill, when he asked him for a 50p that was lying alongside front of covered end.
    "that just hit me on the head you c*** " he announced.
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  • away leg of a league cup tie against bury 1990ish.
    a certain poster on here was so pished he went to leave when the half-time whistle went thinking it was full time.
  • away leg of a league cup tie against bury 1990ish.
    a certain poster on here was so pished he went to leave when the half-time whistle went thinking it was full time.

    I ended up with contact lens disinfecting solution in my eyes after that game - burnt my eyes it did - but thats a whole different story!
  • I was told this story: it was in the early 70's, on the old East Terrace there was a guy who had more than enough to drink, wanted to relieve himself but couldn't bother to walk to the Gents, and somehow he found/was given a bottle and his mates surrounded him to screen out what he was doing... Midway we scored and he leapt in joy, spraying the urine practically everywhere both from the bottle and the source itself. Hope someone on this site was there too add could verify this
  • Not exactly from the terraces. I remember when we played Blackpool in the cup 80/90's I cannot remember.
    A group of Blackpool lads asked the young lady in the Coombes betting booth if they could have a fiver on Stanley Matthews to get the first goal. After much searching the young lady had to be told by her manager that Sir Stan had died decades before.
  • Evening game back in the late 60s. 3 lads all munching peanuts thought it would be funny to put the empty shells in the hood of a guy standing in front. Then it started raining, guy put the hood up and showered himself in peanut shells. Not amused. 3 lads (yes I was one of them) had to move pretty sharpish to escape a thump.
  • Vincent said:

    Late 70's v West Ham FA Cup
    In the covered end and it was packed. I had been talking to a man standing next to me for a while did not mention the fact that I supported Charlton. Just things like we are going to win tonight etc. I was about 13 at the time
    Killer out of no where shot at goal and hit the crossbar, our hands went up and the man standing next to me punched me in the face. To add insult to injury the Police came charging up and removed me to the pen at the far end of the ground until well after the game. Think we lost 1-0 but not sure

    Was that the night game?

    Chaos outside, horses going mental,1000s trying to get in I was 10 or 11 and lost erveyone and ended up outsdie as they locked the covered end trunstiles. Didnt know what to do so walked about for a bit and got a bit scared so went to a garage dpown the Lower Road and asked to borrow the phone and rang home to say i was stranded in the dark in South London. Just as a load of West Ham cam e p[ast and put the windows in.
  • I remember during a really dismal game - we won 1-0 with a bright goal in the second half if that jogs anyone's memory. The match stank the place out. no-one could tackle, no-one could pass. The guy in front of me was getting increasingly irritated. In the end, he totally lost it and was waving his arms yelling "IF AN ALIEN WAS WATCHING THIS MATCH, HE WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO WORK OUT THE RULES. HE'D THINK YU WERE SUPPOSED TO AVOID THE WHITE THING" this went on for a bout a minute, and was hilariously detailed. He wasn't even joking, He meant every word.

    Also, another rubbish game (Southend away? There was a barrier between the pitch and the away fans), and a lady had her shoe thrown over the barrier during a domestic. The whole away end sang "she's only got one shoe". Highlight of the match, along with a photographer who threw it back that looked like Statto from fantasy football league.
  • Another, not exactly at the game. Stockport away in our 1st league 1 season. I'm good mates with a lad up there who shall we say, was a bit of a lad in his day. We're sat in a pub when 5 yoof come bouncing up to him. "I've heard Charlton are in here". "Yeah, he's here" and he pointed to me. The yoof quietly apologised and were on their way.
  • DA1 said:

    Vincent said:

    Late 70's v West Ham FA Cup
    In the covered end and it was packed. I had been talking to a man standing next to me for a while did not mention the fact that I supported Charlton. Just things like we are going to win tonight etc. I was about 13 at the time
    Killer out of no where shot at goal and hit the crossbar, our hands went up and the man standing next to me punched me in the face. To add insult to injury the Police came charging up and removed me to the pen at the far end of the ground until well after the game. Think we lost 1-0 but not sure

    Was that the night game?

    Chaos outside, horses going mental,1000s trying to get in I was 10 or 11 and lost erveyone and ended up outsdie as they locked the covered end trunstiles. Didnt know what to do so walked about for a bit and got a bit scared so went to a garage dpown the Lower Road and asked to borrow the phone and rang home to say i was stranded in the dark in South London. Just as a load of West Ham cam e p[ast and put the windows in.
    It was a night game I think West Ham were a league or two above us and the covered end was packed so it may well have been

  • Vincent said:

    DA1 said:

    Vincent said:

    Late 70's v West Ham FA Cup
    In the covered end and it was packed. I had been talking to a man standing next to me for a while did not mention the fact that I supported Charlton. Just things like we are going to win tonight etc. I was about 13 at the time
    Killer out of no where shot at goal and hit the crossbar, our hands went up and the man standing next to me punched me in the face. To add insult to injury the Police came charging up and removed me to the pen at the far end of the ground until well after the game. Think we lost 1-0 but not sure

    Was that the night game?

    Chaos outside, horses going mental,1000s trying to get in I was 10 or 11 and lost erveyone and ended up outsdie as they locked the covered end trunstiles. Didnt know what to do so walked about for a bit and got a bit scared so went to a garage dpown the Lower Road and asked to borrow the phone and rang home to say i was stranded in the dark in South London. Just as a load of West Ham cam e p[ast and put the windows in.
    It was a night game I think West Ham were a league or two above us and the covered end was packed so it may well have been

    League Cup game @1978.
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  • Vincent said:

    DA1 said:

    Vincent said:

    Late 70's v West Ham FA Cup
    In the covered end and it was packed. I had been talking to a man standing next to me for a while did not mention the fact that I supported Charlton. Just things like we are going to win tonight etc. I was about 13 at the time
    Killer out of no where shot at goal and hit the crossbar, our hands went up and the man standing next to me punched me in the face. To add insult to injury the Police came charging up and removed me to the pen at the far end of the ground until well after the game. Think we lost 1-0 but not sure

    Was that the night game?

    Chaos outside, horses going mental,1000s trying to get in I was 10 or 11 and lost erveyone and ended up outsdie as they locked the covered end trunstiles. Didnt know what to do so walked about for a bit and got a bit scared so went to a garage dpown the Lower Road and asked to borrow the phone and rang home to say i was stranded in the dark in South London. Just as a load of West Ham cam e p[ast and put the windows in.
    It was a night game I think West Ham were a league or two above us and the covered end was packed so it may well have been

    League Cup game @1978.
    Thank you did I get the result right
  • Yes, I think it was Alan Taylor who scored their winner in the 89 minute or so. We also played them in the League Cup at home in our 80-81 promotion season and were very unlucky to lose 2.1. I think David Cross got both of their goals and it might have been "Who`s that scoring goals" Martin Robinson who got our goal a minute after their first.

    Remember the Covered End was "shared" that night with the Hammers fans in there as well! Always like playing West Ham!
  • edited September 2013

    Two stories:

    Port Vale away, October 1990, both involve people no longer with us. With Charlton Trailing 1-0 to a goal from Darren Beckford and with six minutes to go, Rob Lee is fouled by Colin Gibson and referee Reed gives a penalty. Up steps Tommy Caton (RIP) and smashes it in. I remember there was mayhem behind the goal with Addicks going wild. Though I was lost in delirium, I could hear a voice beside me. An old friend called Brian, who may of you may remember and who died from cancer at just 38 and was a bit of a statto announced excitedly "that's the seventh penalty that Port Vale have conceded in the last ten games." Good stat, terrible timing. For some reason, it had the immediate effect of instantly ceasing the celebrations as we struggled to digest this momentous fact.

    Second story and just a couple of months later during that classic 4-4 at Portman Road. After trailing 2-0. Andy Peake pulled one back and then just after the hour, the demi God that was Paul Mortimer equalised. More unbridled joy behind the goal rendered surreal by Morty's apparent desire to come on to the terraces and join the fans. Trouble is he couldn't unfasten the lock on the gate to get in. So we had the bizarre sight of a player struggling to unlock the gate and several fans on the other side also befuddled by the locking mechanisms. I do enjoy these odd moments that bring us crashing back down to earth after a goal.

    Seem to remember Morts did manage to get the gate open but he ended up half in and half out as the stewards tried to close it.

    Derby keeper Martin Taylor being pulled arse over tit into the crowd when we were tenants at West Ham surely deserves a mention.

    There was a really tall, blonde haired guy (could've passed for one of the Proclaimers) who used to go to away games in the early 90's. I remember at a 2-2 draw at Hull he bought a load of hot dogs for his mates and promptly dropped them on the terrace, ketchup and onions ending up going up his leg. As there was a cartoon strip at the time in 'Zit' called 'The Man Who Collects Eyeballs' from then on my mates and I christened him 'The Man Who Drops Hot Dogs'.

    And the fat guy in the Arthur Wait at Selhurst who was always having a go at opposition players. Recall him running along the front of the stand in pursuit of Mark Dennis of Southampton after he claimed Dennis had sworn at him. I think Dennis either laughed at him or blew him a kiss.

  • There was a crazy black lady that sat by herself in the West stand, screaming at the oppo fans. Remember when we lost to Arsenal (The El-Kakouri free kick game) she spent the whole 90 mins telling Henry how she was off to set his house on fire.

    Wonder if she still goes.
  • There was a crazy black lady that sat by herself in the West stand, screaming at the oppo fans. Remember when we lost to Arsenal (The El-Kakouri free kick game) she spent the whole 90 mins telling Henry how she was off to set his house on fire.

    Wonder if she still goes.

    You could be describing Pam who meets the description- she had a voice like a fog horn!

  • Late 80s I went to fa cup 1st round tie at basingstoke against exeter (or torquay) when late in the game the basingstoke right back belted the ball out right into the head of a lad hanging on to the railings who had looked away from the pitch knocking him over. The rb ran over to check the kid was ok and when the lad said he was the rb said then that'll teach you to keep your eye on the ball...

  • Dagenham away in the cup replay. Daggers fans singing Charlton give us a song. @riscardo shouts I'll give you a f**cking song and launches into the full version of Whitney Houston's the greatest love of all.

    Stockport away (Hunt Hattrick) young steward pulled into the crowd over the fence when the 3rd goal went in.

    It was actually the George Benson version ...
  • An away trip up the M1 (might have been Hull) and we had the "sweetie jar" (the big shop ones) with us which was used as a mobile toilet (No 1's only). When it was too full to use safely the lid was screwed up and it was put on the luggage rack that ran the length of the coach above the seats on one side. All of all sudden a tidal wave of piss hit the end of the front of the rack and saturated the front few seats and the unlucky occupiers. The laughter of the rest of thse immediately behind was short-lived as urine began to drip from the air bowers above every seat. The return journey was hell with passengers doubled p on the right-hand side of he coach. The smell was horrendous and the extra weight meant the urine sloshed under the feet of those who were still dry.
  • Oh and that wasn't an Official coach, just in case you were wondering.
  • I was only young when we were away to Chelsea in the 80's when Paul Miller scored the only goal really late on. I was up on my chair dancing and cheering while my Dad was motionless.

    I forgot where I was. I was in with the away fans.

    We beat a rather hasty retreat whilst dodging all manner of missiles being chucked our way.


    The other funny one was at Highbury - a few years later I think. 2-2 IIRC (Morts and Steve MacKenzie). My uncle and dad were searched by the police as we went in and we joked about what sort of idiot would take anything dangerous into a game like this. Sadly - I'd been practicing my darts with a mate from school that evening and left them in my coat pocket. Luckily I wasn't searched :-)
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