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Andy Gray reveals family nightmare

OllywozereOllywozere
edited April 2009 in General Charlton
Apologies if this has been mentioned elsewhere but there's a piece about Gray's troubles this season in the South London Press. Apparently his wife has had a brain tumour.
http://www.icsouthlondon.co.uk/tn/sport.cfm?id=13262&headline=Excluive: Charlton star Gray reveals family nightmare
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Comments

  • TELTEL
    My Best wished to him and his family.......
  • LedgeLedge
    Well fug me that puts everything into perspective and good luck to him and his trouble
  • Henry IrvingHenry Irving
    terrible for him and his family.
  • kimbokimbo
    Well as Ledge said puts things into persepective, hope his wife is getting better. We all know but need to be reminded sometime that there is more to life than football
  • Chris_from_SidcupChris_from_Sidcup
    Most definitely a terrible thing to go through and best wishes to him and his wife but..............makes our managers look even more stupid for picking him! How could they expect him to perform with that on his mind?!! I don't care if he said he was ok to play, he wasn't, end of story.
  • Charlton DanCharlton Dan
    Feel for him.
  • Curb_ItCurb_It
    I believe it was benign thankfully. someone might correct me if im wrong.
  • ShootersHillGuruShootersHillGuru
    Benign unfortunately is not necessarily good news. If its inoperable then it can just be as much a problem as a malignancy. Hope all works out well for Andy and his family.
  • ElthamaddickElthamaddick
    [quote][cite]Posted By: Chris_from_Sidcup[/cite]Most definitely a terrible thing to go through and best wishes to him and his wife but..............makes our managers look even more stupid for picking him! How could they expect him to perform with that on his mind?!! I don't care if he said he was ok to play, he wasn't, end of story.[/quote]

    spot on
  • golfaddickgolfaddick
    I whole heartedly agree.

    A "normal" employee would be able to take compasionate leave and be off work indefinatly - Gray should not have been anywhere near the club or training ground until her sitaution improved.

    have we no-one at the club anymore with any common sense ?
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  • Curb_ItCurb_It
    I thought he did have time off? He was given as much as he wanted and then he asked to play. if he says playing woudl make him feel better then why not?
  • Henry IrvingHenry Irving
    He did miss a couple of games in October.

    Very harsh to make a judgement on "common sense" when you haven't even spoken to the people involved
  • ChizzChizz
    [cite]Posted By: golfaddick[/cite]I whole heartedly agree.

    A "normal" employee would be able to take compasionate leave and be off work indefinatly - Gray should not have been anywhere near the club or training ground until her sitaution improved.

    have we no-one at the club anymore with any common sense ?

    Who should have had the "common sense" to over-rule a player who says he is fit to play and for whom football might have been his one opportunity to "take his mind off" the constant worry of his wife's condition?

    How would the manager try to explain a decision like that to Richard Murray?
  • Dazzler21Dazzler21
    I love you Andy Gray - However few goals you score ;oP

    Best of luck and wishes to his whole familia
  • Henry IrvingHenry Irving
    And we sponsored his shirt this season.

    Charlton Life that is.
  • LenGloverLenGlover
    No wonder his form was variable with all that on his mind and that is before we even think about his injury.

    One cannot help but wonder whether the manager should have left him out though even if he was willing to play.

    Hindsight is easy though.
  • BlackForestRedsBlackForestReds
    edited April 2009
    [cite]Posted By: Chris_from_Sidcup[/cite]Most definitely a terrible thing to go through and best wishes to him and his wife but..............makes our managers look even more stupid for picking him! How could they expect him to perform with that on his mind?!! I don't care if he said he was ok to play, he wasn't, end of story.

    If they knew about this before signing him then fair comment, since the illness became apparent around a year after he signed then your comment is way off, unless you want to criticise Pardew for not being blessed with clairvoyancy.
  • ChizzChizz
    [cite]Posted By: LenGlover[/cite]No wonder his form was variable with all that on his mind and that is before we even think about his injury.

    One cannot help but wonder whether the manager should have left him out though even if he was willing to play.

    Hindsight is easy though.

    Try telling Richard Murray that a player shouldn't be allowed to throw himself into playing for Charlton because his wife's ill.
  • LenGloverLenGlover
    edited April 2009
    [cite]Posted By: Chizz[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: LenGlover[/cite]No wonder his form was variable with all that on his mind and that is before we even think about his injury.

    One cannot help but wonder whether the manager should have left him out though even if he was willing to play.

    Hindsight is easy though.

    Try telling Richard Murray that a player shouldn't be allowed to throw himself into playing for Charlton because his wife's ill.

    Which is why I said THE MANAGER should have left him out. I don't blame Andy Gray at all.

    Managers are paid to make judgements which Dowie and Pardew in particular have failed to do and that is why we are in the parlous financial state we are now with dross like Christiansen draining our resources.
  • stilladdictedstilladdicted
    We were waiting for a match to start and Andy had just arrived back from the hospital and played in the match. He was getting a lot of stick already at that stage. To this day, it doesn't seem right to me to have put him on the pitch, both from a club viewpoint and for Andy.
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  • nth_london_addicknth_london_addick
    I hope that the whole family pull through this and that all ends well.

    hopefully we might see him next year we will need him
  • Chris_from_SidcupChris_from_Sidcup
    [cite]Posted By: BlackForestReds[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: Chris_from_Sidcup[/cite]Most definitely a terrible thing to go through and best wishes to him and his wife but..............makes our managers look even more stupid for picking him! How could they expect him to perform with that on his mind?!! I don't care if he said he was ok to play, he wasn't, end of story.

    If they knew about this before signing him then fair comment, since the illness became apparent around a year after he signed then your comment is way off, unless you want to criticise Pardew for not being blessed with clairvoyancy.


    What are you talking about? I said the managers were stupid for picking him when he clearly had this issue on his mind. He wasn't in the right frame of mind to play and should have been left out/given time off/whatever you want to call it. That's got absolutely nothing to do with when Pardew signed him.
  • MortimericianMortimerician
    [cite]Posted By: golfaddick[/cite]I whole heartedly agree.

    A "normal" employee would be able to take compasionate leave and be off work indefinatly - Gray should not have been anywhere near the club or training ground until her sitaution improved.

    have we no-one at the club anymore with any common sense ?
    Gray was given as much time off as he needed and declared himself ready to come back, which is both the common sense and compassionate thing to do, right? What the dickens is your point?
  • DA9DA9
    Good luck Andy, your wife and family, everything else said on the matter, IMO, is worthless, nothing else matters in the circumstances.
  • VincenzoVincenzo
    Poor fcuker. Really feel for him, that's awful. Best of luck to him.

    Same thing happened to a mate's wife at the end of last year, of similar age, and it didn't end well.
  • ImissthepeanutmanImissthepeanutman
    I can relate very personally to these circumstances.

    I really dont see why anybody needs to be critical of the Manager in this situation.

    The process of establishing what type of tumour and appropriate treatment program is not straightforward. Must have been hell.

    And to cope with this at the time of arrival of a new child leaves me with nothing but praise for Andy and his family. Best wishes mate and if we see you in a Charlton shirt again (or any shirt for that matter) I will applaud you with all my heart.
  • AFKABartramAFKABartram
    Like a few others, kind of knew at the time and it made me feel sick listening to people in the stands digging him out for his performances at the time.

    Good luck Andy, can't imagine what nightmare you've all been going through, but pray for a happy ending. Football is irrelevent mate.
  • Kap10Kap10
    [cite]Posted By: Vincenzo[/cite]Poor fcuker. Really feel for him, that's awful. Best of luck to him.

    Same thing happened to a mate's wife at the end of last year, of similar age, and it didn't end well.

    Same as an ex boss of mine who died last month. Nasty business all round. Only the management and Andy Gray no what went on what decisions were made, so it does seem daft to have people on here bickering about it.
  • nigelnigel
    My father had a brain tumour in 1991. Flew to America to be at his bedside - and he survived to live another seven years. When he died it was nothing to do with the tumour - it was cirrhosis of the liver that got him.

    Have to say, though, I strongly disagree with AFKA's comment that because he knew of Gray's circumstances it made him feel ''sick listening to people in the stands digging him out for his performances at the time.''

    a) It was a conscious decision on the part of the club and player that nobody outside the elite circle of Charlton 'insiders' should know.

    b) He should not have been out there. His wife had a brain tumour - and we later found out that he had an undiagnosed serious hip injury,which eventually curtailed his season. He wasn't fit, mentally or physically. It showed in his performances and llack of goals and although I have every sympathy with his plight, his decision to play on is one of the (many) reasons we are getting relegated.

    Sorry if that sounds harsh. It's not meant to be. He should have been put on indefinite compassionate leave. Makes you wonder why on earth Stoke came in for him in January. Obviously they didn't know that he was mentally and physically unfit, either.
  • CarterCarter
    Right, now if he said he was okay to play a secondary decision should have been made by the management to say firmly 'no you're not'. I can see more than symapthetically why he would want to but so would to focus on something else. I have all the time in the world for Andy Gray in managing to keep quiet whilst hearing some shit thrown his way when, even without hitting the back of the net he was a good player for us.

    I honestly hope all turns out ok for the Gray family. And hopefully he will be about with us next season
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