Agree with NSS completely - My son is 7 and been twice so far this season he has heard me swear - knows what swear words are - they are adult words and when he is an adult he is free to use as he pleases - but while he is my child living in my house he isn't allowed to use them - there are rights and responsibilities if he wants to go to CAFC - which he really does.....
For the past 3-4 years, i've had a few young kids sit in the seats directly in front of me, and through that i've found myself 'holding back' when i want to vent a vocal torrent.
I'm a particularly vocal supporter during games, a few years ago i had the chief steward hiding behind me with recording equipment trying to catch me out, but i've found through having kids around me, i;m constantly holding back on what i want to say because i don't want to be the bloke that swears a lot in front of little ones.
I'm not a bad fan in any way, but football has always been a bit of letting of steam to some people, and occassionally i feel a bit cheesed off i've involuntarily got out of that situation.
There is a crazy double standard kind of situation developing where use of foul and abusive language maybe understandably is against the law, yet any programmes involving Gordon Ramsay contain constant use of one particular word which is considered foul and abusive. Sure you can exercise your right to switch off, but if somebody were to use those words regularly at a football match, I'm sure the Chief Steward would be behind them with a tape recorder. OK you can say there is a difference between saying "f*cking hell that was a terrible meal" and "f*ck off you pathetic excuse for a Ref". The first being a general exclaimation of your unhappiness and the other being aimed at a specific person. In the end I do not think it is the job of government to legislate as to what words are used. Sure have rules about racisim, homophobia, sexism etc and legislate to ensure that people do not have to put up with the language associated with them but take a word like "gay", for example; it can be used in it's original sense, it can be used as a perfectly acceptable word to describe somebodies sexual orientation, it can be used, as it is by kids on the street to describe things they don't like, or it can be used in a totally offensive way. It's not the word itself thats the problem but the context in which it's used.
AFKA - the North Stand you should be able to say what you like - it should be an area where language and a bit of a drink are tolerated at the end of the day how much money do the club make from us in terms of beer sales? (not as much as if they sold decent beers!) - I think of it as a bit of a bear pit - in fact that's how I would like it to be - sometimes it is - sometimes it isn't - but if I choose to take my son there I do it knowing that.
Anything else is not right and if they need to print a reminder on the ticket ie the North Upper is a 12A area....
[quote][cite]Posted By: Terry Naylor[/cite]Took my little girl when she was 4 to a Welling friendly.
Then took her to her first propper match against Bolton in the prem now she is a season ticket holder aged 7 (She is a Charlton stat)
Took my son to his first game last Saturday 2 weeks before his 4th birthday and even though we lost he loved every minute of it!
His first words on Sunday morning when he woke up was "We going to Charlton today dad?"[/quote]
Something about that really touched me Terry not sure why....
I think on the swearing thing, just take them to football, its brilliant, bit of swearing goes on everywhere at least when he/she hears it and likes or doesnt like it their next to their dad or mum.......
If your coming home from school seeing soemone get beaten up and hearing a load of swearing thats gonna be a lot worse.......
Its actually a chance to teach the kids about swearing......... use that as an argument?? (probably not actually) lol
i take my 10 year old nephew and he's been a season ticket holder since he was 6. he lives for charlton and proudly wears his shirt whenever he goes out and when his chelsea/arsenal/manyoo shirt wearing mates rib him all he has to ask them is if they've ever actually been to a game and they shut it. we originally sat in the west but have now moved to the family stand and we never have any problems there, unless i slip out a naughty word obviously. my only problem is taking him to away games when the language does get a bit fruity - he did learn a particularly nice phrase at blackburn a few years back when rommedahl came over to our end and the chap behind us felt the need to tell him what he thought of him. the sentence contained the C word quite a few times. so there i draw the line because we don't want him hearing stuff like that but as for going to the valley, i can recommend the family stand, you'd be surprised at the atmosphere and the singing along and to boot i don't have to explain to him what the C word means. he is the future of supporters at charlton and he will go to every home game.
[quote][cite]Posted By: Henry Irving[/cite]AFKA is right. Just like any activity you do with your children it bounds you and with football introduces them to an adult world (good and bad).
Also gives the Mrs a chance for some down time.[/quote]
I have to say, that point there is the best... Women LOVE down time just to have a day off to relax a bit, have a break from the kids and all the busy daily chores etc,
I'm sure if you were to get her a spa day for the first game when the time comes and she is "father" to your child she'd let you go... or buy her a Dodge Viper if you're loaded ;o)
Both my parents swear like troopers! My dad in particular suffers from road rage and quite often will turn off the radio and shout the 'c word' at the drive for the most trivial things, mainly for driving slowly. I understood that they were allowed to swear because they were adults and that I wasn't allowed, never had a problem with it.
I first starting going with him when I was about 11, we sat in the middle of the then new east stand and didn't have a problem with the language. Eventually (when I was a teen) we got season tickets nearer the Jimmy Seed End, where he would slip out a few words to the away fans and wouldn't mind if I did the same. As Exiled said, there's a time and place for it and if that was understood than it was allowed in moderation.
I think another thing to think about is at what age to take them. I think they should be interested in football before their first game or else they could get bored and put off.
have been taking my son to the odd game over the last few seasons. It is only this year that he seems to be getting into it.
as for swearing, he hears it during the games and when we have talked about it he admits he knows some swear words, but won't tell me which ones as he knows he shouldn't use them at home.
kids nowadays will here swearing in loads of places as long as they are aware when they should and should not use that part of their vocabulary then I don't see it as a problem.
Took my boy to his first Valley match V WBA a couple of years back...we lost 4-1, there first away win of the season and Robson kept them up. Verdict, he noe hates WBA with a vengece, has relised not everything goes your way, and has seen what passion people have for the game and the team they support. Best thing I ever done, first boys weekend away at forest this weekend! Can't wait!
"What goes at football stays at football,northstandjoe has been told this from day one."
Correct Steve. I have had the same conversation with my son. If he forgets that rule, then he don't go. However the world ain't all fluffy and nice and I want him to be exposed gently to what happens in the real world.
He loves going to Charlton, and I wish I could take him every week. As others have said, it a marvellous way to bond with your kids, and it makes me very proud, just like I know it made my Dad proud when he would hold my hand walking down Charlton Church Lane back in the 70's.
I've been taking my 3 boys to The Valley for years, my eldest is 14 and he's had a ST since 6. I was concerned about the swearing too, not just just other peoples but my own as well. I get a bit...ahem...animated during a game. My take is this this, if someone swears and the child does not know its a swear word then they are none the wiser, it someone swears and the child understands the swear word then they have already been exposed to bad language. I have one rule when I take my kids to a game and its that any bad language you hear at the game stays at the game.
When my eldest was about 7 we picked his mate up to go bowling, now his mate has never been to a game and was brought up speaking very well, anyway the kids love the atmosphere at a game and of course the songs, my eldests mate said what was the best song at the game? (We had just been robbed by a ref and had lost the game, cant remember who, The referees a w@@ker was a popular tune that day.) My eldest says 'Oh thats easy, the referee's a whicker, the referee's a whicker'!!! Now he is much older, when the crowd sing that song, he sings it with the wicker part so his concience is clear.
So take them along, its too big an adventure for kids to let a few words spoil it.
When I first took my eldest along we both had STs in the family stand. There was a kid of about 15 who sat in front of us who used to go along with (I presume) his dad and his grandad. Although the family stand is normally pretty quiet, this kid always enjoyed singing along with the songs his favourite of which was, "Oh South London is wonderful....".
One day his dad wasn't there and his seat was taken by a woman (presumably Mum). The kid, thoroughly enjoyng himself, sang the whole song through before realising that it wasn't his dad sitting next to him. Mum was giving him the thousand yard stare, whilst he flushed up to the same colour of a home shirt. Sadly we never heard him singing it again and the next season, they never game back. I hope he found his rightful place in the North-Upper.
I'm actually going to print out quite a few of the best ones and let my girlfriend read them, as I think hearing peoples actual experiences might change her mind.
As Curb It said this is all hypothetical anyway but as it's a discussion we've had a few times and disagreed on it would be good to give her a different perspective.
My 9 year old daughter was happily singing along "We are Japanese, say we are Japanese" on Saturday, I had to remind her later tho that due to Leeds winning we were no longer 'Japanese'
Here is a compramise for you and your missus dansmudge. i have always maintained at Charlton we have the best of both worlds if you do not want you child to here the swearing and bad language and agro then sit in east or west stand or family enclosure or if you dont mind it then sit in the north upper or lower were swaring are that are common place.
I have always been very proud of my club in the sense that we can accomodate families who dont wanna here swaring and game football supporters who like to be noisy.
There's a kid of about 11 who sits in the East stand with his Dad. I reckon every 5 minutes the kid shouts out ' Pass it you twat or tackle you twat.' If I was his Dad i'd be really embaressed.
Kids as just as likely to be exposed to the same language on the bus, in the shops at school etc. The parent / child bonding that goes with going to football far outweighs and potential negatives IMO......agree with you there AFKA.
Remember going down with my father to the Valley, I was only young ( he died when I was 16). I think that is why the club is so special to me, we had a different relationship, and could talk about things as well as football.
Took my sons and grandsons down to the Valley, my grandson is a Liverpool supporter for his sins as he lives up that way, but he always tells me he looks out for the Charlton result!.
[cite]Posted By: razil[/cite]My 9 year old daughter was happily singing along "We are Japanese, say we are Japanese" on Saturday, I had to remind her later tho that due to Leeds winning we were no longer 'Japanese'
Took NLJR to the southampton game sat in the bottom west corner and he took a fair amount of stick mainly about his oldman being fat and balding (all in good humour) nothing OTT quite amusing,
not as amusing as him running along the seats tpo celebrate the equaliser this was taken quite well by the southampton unfortunatly for him when he celebrated the 2nd goal for the addicks he didnt take the fact it was offside quite as well and tears did appear not sure because of the disallowed goal or the fact they were larfing at him
Comments
For the past 3-4 years, i've had a few young kids sit in the seats directly in front of me, and through that i've found myself 'holding back' when i want to vent a vocal torrent.
I'm a particularly vocal supporter during games, a few years ago i had the chief steward hiding behind me with recording equipment trying to catch me out, but i've found through having kids around me, i;m constantly holding back on what i want to say because i don't want to be the bloke that swears a lot in front of little ones.
I'm not a bad fan in any way, but football has always been a bit of letting of steam to some people, and occassionally i feel a bit cheesed off i've involuntarily got out of that situation.
Anything else is not right and if they need to print a reminder on the ticket ie the North Upper is a 12A area....
Then took her to her first propper match against Bolton in the prem now she is a season ticket holder aged 7 (She is a Charlton stat)
Took my son to his first game last Saturday 2 weeks before his 4th birthday and even though we lost he loved every minute of it!
His first words on Sunday morning when he woke up was "We going to Charlton today dad?"[/quote]
Something about that really touched me Terry not sure why....
I think on the swearing thing, just take them to football, its brilliant, bit of swearing goes on everywhere at least when he/she hears it and likes or doesnt like it their next to their dad or mum.......
If your coming home from school seeing soemone get beaten up and hearing a load of swearing thats gonna be a lot worse.......
Its actually a chance to teach the kids about swearing......... use that as an argument?? (probably not actually) lol
just take em
Also gives the Mrs a chance for some down time.[/quote]
I have to say, that point there is the best... Women LOVE down time just to have a day off to relax a bit, have a break from the kids and all the busy daily chores etc,
I'm sure if you were to get her a spa day for the first game when the time comes and she is "father" to your child she'd let you go...
or buy her a Dodge Viper if you're loaded ;o)
I first starting going with him when I was about 11, we sat in the middle of the then new east stand and didn't have a problem with the language. Eventually (when I was a teen) we got season tickets nearer the Jimmy Seed End, where he would slip out a few words to the away fans and wouldn't mind if I did the same. As Exiled said, there's a time and place for it and if that was understood than it was allowed in moderation.
I think another thing to think about is at what age to take them. I think they should be interested in football before their first game or else they could get bored and put off.
as for swearing, he hears it during the games and when we have talked about it he admits he knows some swear words, but won't tell me which ones as he knows he shouldn't use them at home.
kids nowadays will here swearing in loads of places as long as they are aware when they should and should not use that part of their vocabulary then I don't see it as a problem.
Probably learnt them from his Auntie in the car on the way to the game!!!
Correct Steve. I have had the same conversation with my son. If he forgets that rule, then he don't go. However the world ain't all fluffy and nice and I want him to be exposed gently to what happens in the real world.
He loves going to Charlton, and I wish I could take him every week. As others have said, it a marvellous way to bond with your kids, and it makes me very proud, just like I know it made my Dad proud when he would hold my hand walking down Charlton Church Lane back in the 70's.
When my eldest was about 7 we picked his mate up to go bowling, now his mate has never been to a game and was brought up speaking very well, anyway the kids love the atmosphere at a game and of course the songs, my eldests mate said what was the best song at the game? (We had just been robbed by a ref and had lost the game, cant remember who, The referees a w@@ker was a popular tune that day.) My eldest says 'Oh thats easy, the referee's a whicker, the referee's a whicker'!!! Now he is much older, when the crowd sing that song, he sings it with the wicker part so his concience is clear.
So take them along, its too big an adventure for kids to let a few words spoil it.
One day his dad wasn't there and his seat was taken by a woman (presumably Mum). The kid, thoroughly enjoyng himself, sang the whole song through before realising that it wasn't his dad sitting next to him. Mum was giving him the thousand yard stare, whilst he flushed up to the same colour of a home shirt. Sadly we never heard him singing it again and the next season, they never game back. I hope he found his rightful place in the North-Upper.
I'm actually going to print out quite a few of the best ones and let my girlfriend read them, as I think hearing peoples actual experiences might change her mind.
As Curb It said this is all hypothetical anyway but as it's a discussion we've had a few times and disagreed on it would be good to give her a different perspective.
Cheers!
I have always been very proud of my club in the sense that we can accomodate families who dont wanna here swaring and game football supporters who like to be noisy.
Remember going down with my father to the Valley, I was only young ( he died when I was 16).
I think that is why the club is so special to me, we had a different relationship, and could talk about things as well as football.
Took my sons and grandsons down to the Valley, my grandson is a Liverpool supporter for his sins as he lives up that way, but he always tells me he looks out for the Charlton result!.
not as amusing as him running along the seats tpo celebrate the equaliser this was taken quite well by the southampton unfortunatly for him when he celebrated the 2nd goal for the addicks he didnt take the fact it was offside quite as well and tears did appear not sure because of the disallowed goal or the fact they were larfing at him