fake PA announcements you'd like to hear

Alex Wright

following on from the anorak addick fanzine thread.......

BDL suggested he's like to be able to say: "Message to Mr. Henry Irving, would you please go home as your wife has just gone over to Labour."

What PA announcements would you like to hear at the Valley?

I'd like: "Would Micheal Grade please go to the diary room"

Carter

For last season;

'Could Mr Hasslebaink please pull his finger out from his arse'

northstandsteve

For Fcuk sake Denis !!!!!!!

Alex Wright

"would the owner of a white ford cortina, registration number CHG 288 N please remove it from the Chairmans personal parking space"

The Equaliser

' Attention a Mr K McKenzie your taxi to South Bermondsey is waiting behind the west Stand'

leftbehind

Would the Fan in N Block row ZZ seat 234 go collect your free season ticket for life

Thommo

The next london bound train will be held until ten minutes after the final whistle allowing you all to see Chris Powells celebrations

LoOkOuT

When Warnock's lot come to The Valley wouldn't it be funny if the new announcer called them "Palarse" in the build-up? ;-)

kigelia

How about using the PA system for the world's largest game of 'Simon Says'

AFKABartram

Here is a public safety announcement. For the respect and enjoyment of your fellow supporters, could the family near the front of H Block, East Stand, PLEASE stop continuously clapping. Thank You

leftbehind

Would the Fan in N Block row ZZ seat 234 go collect your Beer please do not queue as we have it ready to cllect sir

AFKABartram

Please remember thhat the Valley is a no-smoking stadium throughout. Until we score that is. Then you are allocated a 4 minutes amnesty to puff away as much as you like. Thank You

The Equaliser

Attention Mr S Jordan , Mr R Murray has booked your car for your trip to the Championship and will be leaving the Valley at 4.55pm..........you tosser.

kigelia

"would fans in the east stand kindly refrain from trying to feed the goldfish that lives in the big screen"

AFKABartram

Would the owner of the top of the range Ferrari parked outside the North Stand, please stand up so Curb It and Suzi can check you out. Thank You.

AFKABartram

Could AFKA Bartram please stand up. Oh you are, apologies. Thank You

Henry Irving

The Football Licencing Authority have informed us that standing in the north upper is now compulsory

CAFCBourne

Mr Carter we have successfully located your littles uns in the toilet of North Upper please collect immediately

AFKABartram

Valley Gold time now, so please put your hands together and give a special Valley welcome to.....Simon Jordan !!

AFKABartram

We have a treat for you at half time. Here, performing their new single 'i''m gonna get on all 4's and squeal like a pig', is Girls Allowed. Naked

AFKABartram

On the tannoy today, we're going to be largely celebrating the life and works of Milo.............

Henry Irving

And to celebrate the Wedding of Mr Tavern and Miss Curb-it we are going to play "their Song"

*and I'm feeling glad all over, yes I'm a glad all over....."

Shag

If anyone has found a cat could they please return it to the lost property office

Curb_It

ha ha... tho i would prefer to lolol

KillersBeard

Oi you!, yes you in the east stand walking up the stairs, there's still ten minutes left you nob, siddarn!

thai malaysia addick

We have a lost child at the office answering to the name of Cory. Would the parents please collect him from.......

Addickted

Attention Mr Simons, the brewery dray is now behind the West Stand.

leftbehind

Can the North Upper please start teh Bouncy
Thank You


Also

East Stand 15 minutes to go we are winning about time you all started to go home, Thank you for your part time support

BDL

[cite]Posted By: kigelia[/cite]"would fans in the east stand kindly refrain from trying to feed the goldfish that lives in the big screen"

Love it - I've pebbledashed my screen again you gits

LargeAddick

'Oi Golfie, we're 5-0 up and your'e still whinging. Shut up !!'

AFKABartram

"Could Danny Mills please stop reading Charlton Life, and return to the pitch for the 2nd Half immediately. Thank You"