You win the £88 million jackpot...
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Probably add a farm to my plot of land too, so I can rear my own steaks, bacon, chops, chicken nuggets, thighs and breasts as well as eggs.1
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One of the first things I would actually do is hire a jumbo and fly all my family and mates on holiday for a week to somewhere like Dubai giving them £10K spending money each or something like that.
I’d give something like £25M away to friends and family, a chunk to charity and with the £40 odd I had left I would spend 15 or so on houses and cars around the globe and the rest on a load of property here, employing someone to manage it all for me.0 -
I’m not really that keen on horses.....Stu_of_Kunming said:
That is a very disrespectful way to talk about whores.AddickUpNorth said:I’d blow the vast majority of it on animals.
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pay off debts, pay off family mortgages etc then I'd buy a nice plot of land and a converted barn in the country as a base, travel the world and then invest in properties.
I doubt i'd go completely ape sh!t and spunk loads of it, but I'd certainly travel in style.0 -
Brilliant - we've all got a mother-in-law.i_b_b_o_r_g said:- Get our house finished
- Stick £5m in some sort of bank account
- Sort family and friends out (clear debts, pay off mortgages, hire hitmen for).
_ Then give the rest to a couple of small charities, were'd I'd see it make a difference0 -
Of course @SoundAsa£ its what I meant all along, I now realise that many things on here can be miscon-strudled !SoundAsa£ said:
Would that be Diet Coke Greenie........and what kind of tarts, apple and blackberry, or mince...........Bakewell would go down well with me?Greenie said:Coke n Tarts.
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Or minceconstrudeled even!Greenie said:
Of course @SoundAsa£ its what I meant all along, I now realise that many things on here can be miscon-strudled !SoundAsa£ said:
Would that be Diet Coke Greenie........and what kind of tarts, apple and blackberry, or mince...........Bakewell would go down well with me?Greenie said:Coke n Tarts.
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Two years ago myfriend was part of a syndicate that won £5 million.
His share was £750k.
Two years on everything has gone, mainly due to his three children all pleading poverty, and saying they have loads of debt.
He doesn’t have anything to show from this win.
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HAPPY THURSDAYBillericay Dickie said:Two years ago myfriend was part of a syndicate that won £5 million.
His share was £750k.
Two years on everything has gone, mainly due to his three children all pleading poverty, and saying they have loads of debt.
He doesn’t have anything to show from this win.6 - Sponsored links:
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Buy and run a gym
Buy a dominos pizza - so the fat people need to use my gym.
Make sure my mum and Dad are financially sweet.
Coke n tarts.3 -
Pay debts off obviously, clear mortgage, 1m would go to each direct relative (parents/siblings/children) 250-500k to certain relatives and close friends, total spend about 15-16m, find land on kent/Sussex borders, employ father in law to oversee 6-7 bedroom house build with pool/games room/cinema room/ party room, then feck off around the world for a year or until it’s completed.
Upon return, invest and use interest and profits to live comfortably, set up trust funds and probably be a bit of a philanthropist where kids & ex servicemen charities are concerned.0 -
Buy a fucking big train set. What else?4
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Always fancied buying an island but until I actually buy a ticket have decided not to research the matter!1
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Whoever buys me the 87th beer is also in charge of kebab detailpaulie8290 said:
How about if I buy you 87 beerscreepyaddick said:I'm gonna give £1M to each of the first 87 of you lot that buys me a beer!
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Southern Rail perhaps.man_at_milletts said:Buy a fucking big train set. What else?
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Train set, not cowboy outfit;-)Stig said:
Southern Rail perhaps.man_at_milletts said:Buy a fucking big train set. What else?
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How ridiculous.Billericay Dickie said:Two years ago myfriend was part of a syndicate that won £5 million.
His share was £750k.
Two years on everything has gone, mainly due to his three children all pleading poverty, and saying they have loads of debt.
He doesn’t have anything to show from this win.0 -
I'd
Id try to this, but on the first night I'd get very drunk and boast about it on Facebook and CL.PaddyP17 said:I have a big plan in place. It's boring, but oh well. Given lottery winners are tens or hundreds of times more likely to be murder victims; robbed; die of a drug overdose; be kidnapped; bankrupted; and so on - I've needed a cast-iron plan.
These numbers, of course, aren't exact.
1a. TELL NO-ONE. (At least, not immediately, despite the likely urge.)
1b. Get on to Camelot. They know what to do. Insist on anonymity when they come round, and all that.
1c. Hire a lawyer. Ideally a proper big nob lawyer, partner at a firm, that sort of thing.
2. Still TELL NO-ONE. I'm not going public. I'm probably not telling family or friends yet, as much as is possible. I will "fall ill", or something.
3a. Tell my lawyer I intend to give £15m of this jackpot to family and friends. This will NOT be in the form of a lump sum. I may, however, clear a few debts (student loans, mortgages, what have you).
Trust funds going through stock indices and what have you shall be set up for my cousins; money shall go toward an annuity from which my brother can pull money out of/house deposit/that sort of thing, if he so wants; and for my parents and other relatives etc etc.
Get lawyer/accountant to sort all that out. This leaves £73m.
3b. I'll take £3m to myself "for the time being" (immediate expenses e.g. my lawyer, maybe an accountant, buying a property quickly so I can do all this in private). This leaves £70m.
(Might have to do 3b immediately post-Camelot as part of step 1, but who knows)
4. If possible, dump £15m in UK government bonds that should be paying at around 2-3% (or another govt, if possible). That should be a bona fide income of, hopefully, £300k-450k a year. That is rock solid money. If the UK stops paying on their government debt, then money is nowhere near our biggest worry. This leaves £55m.
5. Be boring again and dump £30m into an index fund, with low fees. Hopefully said fund will pay out at around 4%. In 20 years, that £30m becomes £65m. Tidy. This leaves £25m.
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So - I have now, hopefully, guaranteed myself an income of at least £300k a year unless the Bank of England is burning; provided for family and friends in a way they would never have imagined; and I have a huge pot in the form of an index fund that will keep growing at market rates.
Life is good, so step 6:
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6a. Donate perhaps £10m, if that, to charity. Likely contenders are Anthony Nolan, Alzheimers Research, and NSPCC.
6b. Tell everyone I've won £8m* on the lottery, and do what I want! Buy a couple of houses here and abroad, go on holidays to wherever, party with mates, maybe invest in a couple of fun-looking startups, maybe even go back to university.
(*£8m being roughly the sort of amount I reckon would set oneself up for life - I'd still have £7m left.)
Sorted.0 -
Gets you a few bags of Monkey Dust mate, 196,000,000 to be exactGreenie said:
Youngsters today eh Daz!Dazzler21 said:
No coke and whores?PaddyP17 said:I have a big plan in place. It's boring, but oh well. Given lottery winners are tens or hundreds of times more likely to be murder victims; robbed; die of a drug overdose; be kidnapped; bankrupted; and so on - I've needed a cast-iron plan.
These numbers, of course, aren't exact.
1a. TELL NO-ONE. (At least, not immediately, despite the likely urge.)
1b. Get on to Camelot. They know what to do. Insist on anonymity when they come round, and all that.
1c. Hire a lawyer. Ideally a proper big nob lawyer, partner at a firm, that sort of thing.
2. Still TELL NO-ONE. I'm not going public. I'm probably not telling family or friends yet, as much as is possible. I will "fall ill", or something.
3a. Tell my lawyer I intend to give £15m of this jackpot to family and friends. This will NOT be in the form of a lump sum. I may, however, clear a few debts (student loans, mortgages, what have you).
Trust funds going through stock indices and what have you shall be set up for my cousins; money shall go toward an annuity from which my brother can pull money out of/house deposit/that sort of thing, if he so wants; and for my parents and other relatives etc etc.
Get lawyer/accountant to sort all that out. This leaves £73m.
3b. I'll take £3m to myself "for the time being" (immediate expenses e.g. my lawyer, maybe an accountant, buying a property quickly so I can do all this in private). This leaves £70m.
(Might have to do 3b immediately post-Camelot as part of step 1, but who knows)
4. If possible, dump £15m in UK government bonds that should be paying at around 2-3% (or another govt, if possible). That should be a bona fide income of, hopefully, £300k-450k a year. That is rock solid money. If the UK stops paying on their government debt, then money is nowhere near our biggest worry. This leaves £55m.
5. Be boring again and dump £30m into an index fund, with low fees. Hopefully said fund will pay out at around 4%. In 20 years, that £30m becomes £65m. Tidy. This leaves £25m.
------------
So - I have now, hopefully, guaranteed myself an income of at least £300k a year unless the Bank of England is burning; provided for family and friends in a way they would never have imagined; and I have a huge pot in the form of an index fund that will keep growing at market rates.
Life is good, so step 6:
------------
6a. Donate perhaps £10m, if that, to charity. Likely contenders are Anthony Nolan, Alzheimers Research, and NSPCC.
6b. Tell everyone I've won £8m* on the lottery, and do what I want! Buy a couple of houses here and abroad, go on holidays to wherever, party with mates, maybe invest in a couple of fun-looking startups, maybe even go back to university.
(*£8m being roughly the sort of amount I reckon would set oneself up for life - I'd still have £7m left.)
Sorted.
No point in winning if you're not gonna snort n shag!
Shocking !2 - Sponsored links:
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all the normal stuff, few houses, sort family and friends etc
then a year of international hide and seek
give everyone an open international plane ticket (if they exist. if not just buy them planes), laptops and international sims, then me and the family disappear. a week later they get emailed a clue.
first one to find us starts the next round once everyone has made it.
sorted2 -
What about £98m
Think I'd pay off the directors too for that.0 -
Spend it on booze, birds and fast cards and the rest I'd squander.0
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Snap is faster than poker1
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Give all the staff there bonus1
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One ticket holder won £96,785,706.00 tonight.
Ticket was purchased in......Belgium! I kid you not.2 -
ROT, B20 ?
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I'd hire the SAS to take out a fecking shite referee!!1
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I got five bloody numbers up last Saturday night.
One number away from £5m and a lifetime of leisure.
Instead I'm £646 better off.
Not even enough to hire an Eastern European man with special skills to do one tidying up job in Belgium.1
