The fact that there are pre-recorded announcements saying "There are no working toilets on this train" tells you all you need to know about Southeastern's desire or ability to get them working.
I do, and I feel ashamed of myself for saying this, have some sympathy for Southeastern on this, given that if they do repair a toilet, it's pretty much guaranteed that some drunken arsehole will have vandalised it by the following morning.
Being stuck between Lewisham an New cross because of points failure and you get rumble in your bowels is the stuff of nightmares.
As I get older than rumble in the lower mid section you mention is a legitimate cause for panic, distress and alarm. Chuck in a train journey even if I'm sat next to an empty khazi the thought of having to defecate in a train toilet is something that fills me with fear. Especially those ones with plenty of space to move around but buttons you can never fully trust to do what they are promising to do.
Do any other train services out of Central London run so many trains without toilets? And I'm not talking about toilets that don't work, but a lot of the trains don't have any toilets at all.
the Elizabeth line has no onboard loos, but easy to access at station toilets instead, not sure I want a toilet stinking the train out in a tunnel under Holborn.
As someone with Crohn's disease, I'm ok as long as the gaps between stations aren't huge, and the loos are easy to find.
The toilets at Lee station always seem to be locked due to "unsociable behaviour" you just need to go to the ticket office & ask for the key. Of course once the ticket office is closed then you're fucked................ much the same as when they're left open I imagine.
I heard a story about a bloke who had to take a train journey to a job interview. The journey required a change of train and, while waiting for the second train - and thanks to a heavy night's drinking and bingeing on curry the night before, and a morning drinking copious amounts of black coffee, he had an unstoppable, explosive bowel movement. He ran into the station loo to clean himself up, but his underwear and suit trousers were beyond saving. So, he sheepishly walked into a Marks and Spencer to buy replacements. He - obviously - wanted to keep his distance from everyone in the store, so he put the trousers and underwear on the counter and stood well back, waiting for his chance to pay. Eventually it came to his turn, he zapped his credit card and the store assistant handed him his M&S bag of clothes. He ran out of the shop, across the station concourse, onto his platform and got onto his train for the rest of his journey. The train pulled out of the station and he made his way to the loos on the train, hoping they would be working. Much to his surprise, not only were they open and empty, they'd been recently cleaned. So he had plenty of room to finish the job of cleaning himself up. As the train gathered speed, he removed his trousers and underwear and then did something deliberate, but quite unpleasant: because there was no bin in the loo, he opened the window and threw his soiled trousers and underwear out. That left him wearing just shiny shoes, black socks, a white shirt, colourful tie and suit jacket.
He then opened the M&S bag and found that it contained just one size 14, cashmere cardigan in pale yellow.
A lot of the trains have toilets and are locked due to the arseholes vandalising them. I have had to get off at Dartford and Plumstead to have a pee when returning home from Gravesend. I usually now wait for the Luton or the Bullet trains as they have toilets usually open.
Being stuck between Lewisham an New cross because of points failure and you get rumble in your bowels is the stuff of nightmares.
As I get older than rumble in the lower mid section you mention is a legitimate cause for panic, distress and alarm. Chuck in a train journey even if I'm sat next to an empty khazi the thought of having to defecate in a train toilet is something that fills me with fear. Especially those ones with plenty of space to move around but buttons you can never fully trust to do what they are promising to do.
I share your fear. Touch wood, I have never ever dumped in a train toilet. But as for those disability toilets with the slowly revolving door, they scare the life out of me. I did have one occasion when the door opened on me, fortunately I had finished slashing and was in the middle of a hand wash (incidentally an act that may or may not include soap; has a 70% chance of water and a "dryer" which if it works will take 45 minutes to fully dry your hands). I swear to god I had pushed the lock button. After that I have never trusted them
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I just wish folks could resist the urge to vandalise them.
I agree...I'm sick of masturbating in the carriage in full view of everyone and demand the privacy of a functioning toilet.
Signed 👍
#rights4wankers
As someone with Crohn's disease, I'm ok as long as the gaps between stations aren't huge, and the loos are easy to find.
Touch wood, I have never ever dumped in a train toilet.
But as for those disability toilets with the slowly revolving door, they scare the life out of me.
I did have one occasion when the door opened on me, fortunately I had finished slashing and was in the middle of a hand wash (incidentally an act that may or may not include soap; has a 70% chance of water and a "dryer" which if it works will take 45 minutes to fully dry your hands).
I swear to god I had pushed the lock button. After that I have never trusted them