In the German nick where the hang you by the dick and they draw dirty pictures on the wall you may fart all day but you'll never get away and the mice play snooker with your balls
What did you shout out, when you wanted to be first at something?
For me and my mates in the 1970s it was always 'Bagsy!"(bagsee). My mum and dad (1930s) said that they shouted 'Bags I' (bags eye). My kids (2000s) shouted 'Bugsy' or for reasons that seemed inexplicable to me 'Shotgun'.
Bagsy.
Shotgun is only for getting front passenger seat of the car
What did you shout out, when you wanted to be first at something?
For me and my mates in the 1970s it was always 'Bagsy!"(bagsee). My mum and dad (1930s) said that they shouted 'Bags I' (bags eye). My kids (2000s) shouted 'Bugsy' or for reasons that seemed inexplicable to me 'Shotgun'.
Bagsy.
Shotgun is only for getting front passenger seat of the car
Inbetweeners.
Never watched it
Shotgun was always used in American series/movies in the 80’s
Viz published a hilarious ‘obituary’ of the pre-eminent playground poet and professor of playground poetry once. I can’t find it, but it would be worth putting up here if someone can.
I remember something like that too but I think it was the Mary Whitehouse Experience, not Viz. Maybe they both did something similar.
What did you shout out, when you wanted to be first at something?
For me and my mates in the 1970s it was always 'Bagsy!"(bagsee). My mum and dad (1930s) said that they shouted 'Bags I' (bags eye). My kids (2000s) shouted 'Bugsy' or for reasons that seemed inexplicable to me 'Shotgun'.
Probably from seeing American TV or films where people claim “shotgun” to sit in the front passenger seat,
There once was a man from Darjeeling Who boarded a bus bound for Ealing The sign on the Door Said "Don't spit on the floor" So he stood up a spat on the ceiling...
There was a young girl from Devizes, Who had tits that were different sizes, The left one was small and was no use at all. But the right one was huge and won prizes.
I left this one until last as it’s a bit OTT ……..so apologies to any sensitive souls out there.
The was a young woman from the Azores Who’s c*** was all covered in sores The dogs in the street wouldn’t eat the green meat That hung in festoons from her drawers
There was a young lady from Chippenham Who wore draws with a very large rip in ‘em She let a waiter named Jack go in from the back Well bollocks it was better than tip’n ‘im
Ollie ollie ollie, tits in a trolley, balls in the biscuit tin. Sitting on the grass with a finger up your arse,, playing with your ding-a-linga-a-ling.
There was a young lady from Bude Who went for a swim in the river. A man in a punt Grabbed hold of her arm; Said, "You can't do that round here, it's private."
The was a young lady called Myrtle Who had an affair with a turlte And what’s more abominable A swelling abdominal Proved to Myrtle, the turtle was fertile
Comments
where the hang you by the dick
and they draw dirty pictures on the wall
you may fart all day
but you'll never get away
and the mice play snooker with your balls
to piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee
Fuck you, fuck you , for curiosity
Fight for the old cunt, fight for the old cunt, fight for the old country.
She also had a bear
I have often seen her lamb
But never seen her bare.
Shotgun was always used in American series/movies in the 80’s
Twas split down the sides
And every where that Mary went
The boys could see her thighs
Mary had another dress
Twas split right down the front
And every where that Mary went
The boys could see her petticoat
I honoured her offer
And all night long I was on her and off her
I lay eggs and you lay muck.
Walks like a woman and he wears a bra.
Who boarded a bus bound for Ealing
The sign on the Door
Said "Don't spit on the floor"
So he stood up a spat on the ceiling...
Who had tits that were different sizes,
The left one was small and was no use at all.
But the right one was huge and won prizes.
Fatty blew off and skinny laughed
Fatty and skinny were in the bed
Fatty blew off and skinny was dead
Who’s arse was shaped just like a dahlia
5p a smell was all very well
But 10p a lick was a failure
Who used a dynamite stick for a thrill
They found her vagina in North Carolina
And her tits ended up in Brasil
Who had one long tit and one short’n
To make up for that she had a very large prat
And a fart like a 500 Norton
Said there’s one thing I certainly do know
A woman is fine and a sheep is divine
But a llama is numero uno
Who knew every limerick around
He seems to know quite a few
A few of them Blue
But you can't get too many to the pound
...😉
I left this one until last as it’s a bit OTT ……..so apologies to any sensitive souls out there.
The was a young woman from the Azores
Who’s c*** was all covered in sores
The dogs in the street wouldn’t eat the green meat
That hung in festoons from her drawers
That’s all folks!
There was a young lady from Chippenham
Who wore draws with a very large rip in ‘em
She let a waiter named Jack go in from the back
Well bollocks it was better than tip’n ‘im
playing with your ding-a-linga-a-ling.
A classic! That makes absolutely no sense....
violets are blue
I cannot rhyme
Fuck off Palace you stripey cnuts
Who went for a swim in the river.
A man in a punt
Grabbed hold of her arm;
Said, "You can't do that round here, it's private."
Who had an affair with a turlte
And what’s more abominable
A swelling abdominal
Proved to Myrtle, the turtle was fertile