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Learning a Foreign Language, In Older Age

Well it's looking like I'm going to be moving to Sweden at some point this year or next. I promised my wife when we got together, that if she moved to England I'd pay her back, so I've been planning this for nearly 10 years (just waiting for kids to become independent) and I've been shockingly poor at picking up the language. F in French at school after 5 years tuition says it all.

Just wondering if there are any Lifer's out there that have picked up a completely new language (to a good level of both reading and writing) and what would be their tip for doing so? 
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    From my experience learning from a variety of different methods works well, from lessons with a private teacher going through a textbook with you, to Michele Thomas audio in the car, duo lingo, to watching the tv with the audio on in Swedish (Apple TV language options are great). Of course nothing beats just being in the country and talking lots !
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    I suggest using Duolingo app.

    Someone on here recommended that app to me a few years ago and it paid off. I haven't used it for a while now but it will be interesting to see how much I remember the Spanish when I return to it. Might do it in a year or so.

    I had memory problems, and strongly believe language learning at an older age is a great way to train the mind.

    Women love it 
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    Try Cantonese if you want to feel really inadequate. 
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    I've got this far with my Ukrainian

    Будь ласка, залиште
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    Try Cantonese if you want to feel really inadequate. 
    I'm quite inadequate enough thank you.
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    Here's a few that worked for me. The fact that you're moving over there and can properly immerse yourself in it should really help.
    • Do 1-2-1 lessons as often as possible. Worth the investment if you find a teacher you enjoy chatting to.
    • Meet up with a ‘tandem partner’. Sites like Conversation Exchange help you find people who want to practise your language, while you can practise theirs. 
    • Pick a local football team and follow them on social media / TV etc. It’s easier to pick up language via something you are naturally interested in. 
    • See if they do Mundo Lingo language events. These are relaxed meet-ups in bars where you can practice with people in the same boat, and crucuially with a beer in your hand. 
    • Run errands outside and take cabs (if affordable). Constant mini interactions with people in shops and on the street plus chats with cab drivers are great for nailing some basics and building confidence. 
    • Be patient. Even if it feels like you’re not improving, your brain is laying foundations and also getting a great work-out which has loads of health benefits. 
    Great post.
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    I'll offer a more controversial approach.

    I think that all the apps, textbooks etc are fine ... and they will help enormously if you are someone who is comfortable with grammar, vocabulary, speech etiquette etc in English.

    But people in most (all?) countries do not speak in a textbook manner.  They use the language of the street.  Different regions have different dialects.  Just think 'London' and 'Yorkshire' and it becomes obvious.

    So, my advice is to pick up as many of the commonly-used words and phrases for everyday occurrences.  Don't worry too much about 'the boy sits on the horse'.

    Watch subtitled TV.  Listen to the football commentators.  More importantly, live in the country and the region and listen.

    Learn the language of the street ... and don't be afraid to try when you think you've worked something out.
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    edited February 2022
    15 years ago at the age of 40, I had a natural break between jobs, so took myself off to Amsterdam for a month, rented a flat and attended a daily intensive Dutch language course at the UvA. Apart from being great fun and meeting some great people from other countries, it was a superb course. Morning classes followed by homework that afternoon (which was at least the whole afternoon to get it all done). Because some of my classmates (namely Brazilians and Basques) spoke NO English, the whole thing was done in Dutch. I had a bit of a head-start v the others because I had taught myself some basics when I was in my 20s but my French & German classmates soon caught me up and overtook me...but these were people who already spoke at least three languages really fluently. 

    But by the end of the course, I'd passed the exam and felt confident enough to try speaking it in real-life scenarios. If I had kept it up for another two months, I know I would've been pretty fluent (it's not quite as hard a language as some will have you believe....I found it sort of halfway between English & German). It's faded quite a bit now but there is still something there lurking in the back of my brain! 

    Basically, I just wanted to test myself and see if I could do it at 40 because I'd been good at German at school. 

    So, just be brave with whatever you're trying to learn and 100% don't worry about making mistakes or feeling foolish. The Dutch/Belgians I've conversed with have corrected me when I've got it wrong but in a nice way and are just so pleased/surprised that an Englishman has tried to speak their language. Probably the most satisfying thing was being occasionally mistaken by Amsterdammers as an Afrikaaner or having my Belgian mates taking the piss out of my horrible Amsterdam accent! The Amsterdam accent is really harsh & gutteral, maybe the equivalent of Scouse and my Dutch teacher was suitably appalled by it! 

    Bottom line....go for it! 
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    edited February 2022
    I have a great knowledge of the German language. You can learn Pidgeon step language from a text book, but my learning really ramped up when I work out there.

    As Dave said above the real language isn't text book, but when you get out and about, as you can't string English words together and swap them for German, sadly it doesn't work like that.

    Phrases are often made up with words that individually make no sense but do when strung together. 

    Good luck.
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    Try Cantonese if you want to feel really inadequate. 
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNY9r1UkNm4
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    Here's a few that worked for me. The fact that you're moving over there and can properly immerse yourself in it should really help.
    • Do 1-2-1 lessons as often as possible. Worth the investment if you find a teacher you enjoy chatting to.
    • Meet up with a ‘tandem partner’. Sites like Conversation Exchange help you find people who want to practise your language, while you can practise theirs. 
    • Pick a local football team and follow them on social media / TV etc. It’s easier to pick up language via something you are naturally interested in. 
    • See if they do Mundo Lingo language events. These are relaxed meet-ups in bars where you can practice with people in the same boat, and crucuially with a beer in your hand. 
    • Run errands outside and take cabs (if affordable). Constant mini interactions with people in shops and on the street plus chats with cab drivers are great for nailing some basics and building confidence. 
    • Be patient. Even if it feels like you’re not improving, your brain is laying foundations and also getting a great work-out which has loads of health benefits. 
    Neil is right....those small snippet chats are crucial. They are manageable and once you've done it, your confidence soars. Once you get confident, you'll make even faster progress. You can't learn it unless you are prepared to try speaking it. 
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    edited February 2022
    Another thing with Swedish is to try to learn the parts of words which (just like in English) do not seem to be pronounced as they are written.

    As an example, 'borg' (which is a common ending to some placenames) is pronounced more like 'boy' or 'borry'.  It's probably our equivalent of 'bury' or 'borough'.

    So 'Gothenburg' (in Swedish it's 'Göteborg') will sound like 'Yerterborry'.  Once you pick off elements like that, you can use them as appropriate and you'll sound a bit more authentic too.

    I've also found that the 'hurdy gurdy' Muppets Swedish chef stereotype is (naturally) a bit misleading.  Swedish speakers have different ideas about pitch, so it can mean that, to English ears, the words in a sentence seem to have more tonal variation.  Some words even mean different things depending on the pitch.  You just have to learn that by listening but, in general, I'd say don't be in too much of a hurry to tail off when speaking Swedish.  Give the first part and the final part of the word similar emphasis (so a more 'robotic' flat pronunciation compared to English) and you'll generally sound OK.  It's hard to describe in words, but you get the idea, I'm sure.
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    Well it's looking like I'm going to be moving to Sweden at some point this year or next. I promised my wife when we got together, that if she moved to England I'd pay her back, so I've been planning this for nearly 10 years (just waiting for kids to become independent) and I've been shockingly poor at picking up the language. F in French at school after 5 years tuition says it all.

    Just wondering if there are any Lifer's out there that have picked up a completely new language (to a good level of both reading and writing) and what would be their tip for doing so? 
    I have inboxed you.
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    There's so much good advice there. The difficulty for me learning has been that all of my wife's friends and family switch to English when speaking to me, or even when I'm in the room, to be polite, whereas shop staff all switch immediately etc. As they are all pretty much bilingual it has made me lazy, but I'm trying to focus on my goal of living there and using Swedish as I will need to learn professional grade level language, oral and written, which really intimidates me at this early stage of learning.

    My wife is so proficient in English that she now 'thinks' in English whilst going about her day.

    Thanks all for your very useful tips
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    There's so much good advice there. The difficulty for me learning has been that all of my wife's friends and family switch to English when speaking to me, or even when I'm in the room, to be polite, whereas shop staff all switch immediately etc. As they are all pretty much bilingual it has made me lazy, but I'm trying to focus on my goal of living there and using Swedish as I will need to learn professional grade level language, oral and written, which really intimidates me at this early stage of learning.

    My wife is so proficient in English that she now 'thinks' in English whilst going about her day.

    Thanks all for your very useful tips
    Frustrating isn't it, but like the Dutch and the Nordic countries and the Germans they speak in English a lot, I.E the amount of times I go out and about in Germany and they talk to me in English without me opening my mouth or have any of the usual "British abroad" items on display is crazy.

    If you are determined you will pick it up. Don't forget there is also like here colloquial language as you go out and about the country.
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    There's so much good advice there. The difficulty for me learning has been that all of my wife's friends and family switch to English when speaking to me, or even when I'm in the room, to be polite, whereas shop staff all switch immediately etc. As they are all pretty much bilingual it has made me lazy, but I'm trying to focus on my goal of living there and using Swedish as I will need to learn professional grade level language, oral and written, which really intimidates me at this early stage of learning.

    My wife is so proficient in English that she now 'thinks' in English whilst going about her day.

    Thanks all for your very useful tips
    What part of Sweden are you moving to?

    Eller, vilket stad i Sverige ska bor du?
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    There's so much good advice there. The difficulty for me learning has been that all of my wife's friends and family switch to English when speaking to me, or even when I'm in the room, to be polite, whereas shop staff all switch immediately etc. As they are all pretty much bilingual it has made me lazy, but I'm trying to focus on my goal of living there and using Swedish as I will need to learn professional grade level language, oral and written, which really intimidates me at this early stage of learning.

    My wife is so proficient in English that she now 'thinks' in English whilst going about her day.

    Thanks all for your very useful tips
    You'll have to get your Missus to whisper sweet nothings in Swedish in your ear. My old Danish GF used to say, "Jeg elsker dig".
    You never know, after all those years together, your Missus might still want to say something similar. :wink:

    Seriously, your best familiar source of Swedish living language is already living right with you.

    You'll have to do the studying and spade work in learning yourself, of course - but in everyday life she can informally explain a few things and correct your pronunciation. She'll certainly teach you a few expressions and swear words when you annoy her or haven't done the washing up!

    You just have to make a start, in the ways others have suggested - and just plunge in. 

    You'll make mistakes all the time, but water off a duck's back and all that, people will laugh with you. Just have that courage to speak Swedish with Swedish people, knowing you'll make huge mistakes - but that's how you really learn. There's no other way really.




    BTW  I do the same with my French when I'm in France. It's the actual experience of doing it that helps language to stick.


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    I’ve found that learning German and now Spanish I lean towards the reading aspect of a language more so than speaking it. However, I was surprised how much Spanish I had learnt and was able to get through a basic conversation with non English speakers whilst visiting friends in Columbia. I find their accents and pace of speaking tends to be a tad slower than in Spain. Anyway I continue to learn Spanish but hit a block a week ago. Sound advice given to me is to barge through it and carry on! 
    Good luck. 
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    Mate of mine used to date a bird (Danish) who lived in Dublin. Her annoying American flat mate was going to Copenhagen for the weekend and wanted to learn a few words.

    How do you say ‘Thank You’ in Danish? she asked.

    Tag mig bagfra.
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    French for 6 years now and am semi fluent and I'll be 55 on Monday
    Watch the news and documentaries about things you know helps. It's not just learning the words but also developing an ear for language.
    After you've got some conversation basics I'd definitely advise you get some lessons
    lycka till
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    Immerse yourself in the culture. Go there to live and just try to speak their language. That’s the best way to pick it up. After about a year in total immersion you’d be reasonably fluent. I did that years ago in Milan. Worked there and the only one around me who spoke English was my then girlfriend. A great experience as well. 
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    Move to France and have a kidney transplant. You pick it up virtually overnight, especially the numbers
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    Dave Rudd said:
    Another thing with Swedish is to try to learn the parts of words which (just like in English) do not seem to be pronounced as they are written.

    As an example, 'borg' (which is a common ending to some placenames) is pronounced more like 'boy' or 'borry'.  It's probably our equivalent of 'bury' or 'borough'.

    So 'Gothenburg' (in Swedish it's 'Göteborg') will sound like 'Yerterborry'.  Once you pick off elements like that, you can use them as appropriate and you'll sound a bit more authentic too.

    I've also found that the 'hurdy gurdy' Muppets Swedish chef stereotype is (naturally) a bit misleading.  Swedish speakers have different ideas about pitch, so it can mean that, to English ears, the words in a sentence seem to have more tonal variation.  Some words even mean different things depending on the pitch.  You just have to learn that by listening but, in general, I'd say don't be in too much of a hurry to tail off when speaking Swedish.  Give the first part and the final part of the word similar emphasis (so a more 'robotic' flat pronunciation compared to English) and you'll generally sound OK.  It's hard to describe in words, but you get the idea, I'm sure.
    What you are leading into here is word stress. 
    Your advice surprises me somewhat because,
    although I don't speak Swedish, I know that it is, like English, a stress timed language. I would suspect that this is your perception of the sound of the language rather than based on actual linguistics.

    If your advice were in reference to French then I would understand because French is a syllable timed language. English speakers often perceive French to place the stress on the last syllable but that is just perception. There is no stress in French but there is in English and Swedish.
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    Watch films and programmes in Swedish with English subtitles, then when you feel more confident, re-watch without. You can switch it around too if you want to learn to write as well as speak; watch in English with Swedish subtitles or even in Swedish with Swedish subtitles - with Spanish,  I find they speak so quickly, sometimes I can't pick out some words as they run into one another. And seeing the words in Spanish in the subtitles helps
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    edited February 2022
    Dave Rudd said:
    Another thing with Swedish is to try to learn the parts of words which (just like in English) do not seem to be pronounced as they are written.

    As an example, 'borg' (which is a common ending to some placenames) is pronounced more like 'boy' or 'borry'.  It's probably our equivalent of 'bury' or 'borough'.

    So 'Gothenburg' (in Swedish it's 'Göteborg') will sound like 'Yerterborry'.  Once you pick off elements like that, you can use them as appropriate and you'll sound a bit more authentic too.

    I've also found that the 'hurdy gurdy' Muppets Swedish chef stereotype is (naturally) a bit misleading.  Swedish speakers have different ideas about pitch, so it can mean that, to English ears, the words in a sentence seem to have more tonal variation.  Some words even mean different things depending on the pitch.  You just have to learn that by listening but, in general, I'd say don't be in too much of a hurry to tail off when speaking Swedish.  Give the first part and the final part of the word similar emphasis (so a more 'robotic' flat pronunciation compared to English) and you'll generally sound OK.  It's hard to describe in words, but you get the idea, I'm sure.
    What you are leading into here is word stress. 
    Your advice surprises me somewhat because,
    although I don't speak Swedish, I know that it is, like English, a stress timed language. I would suspect that this is your perception of the sound of the language rather than based on actual linguistics.

    If your advice were in reference to French then I would understand because French is a syllable timed language. English speakers often perceive French to place the stress on the last syllable but that is just perception. There is no stress in French but there is in English and Swedish.
    Yes, I'm talking about pitch rather than stress, although they can blur into one.  The main point I was trying to make is to avoid letting the words 'die' (as we tend to do in English).

    So smörgåsbord ... in English, we pronounce the word as if we are explaining what type of board it is.  It's a 'sandwich' board (as opposed to a chess board etc).

    In Swedish, the pronunciation doesn't tail off ... so it's a 'sandwich board' (ie not only a board, but a board for sandwiches).

    It's difficult to capture all this within written words ... and you are right.  My experience stems from the sounds, not from the books.
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    - commit to your plan, a mixture of structured learning but a large dose of practising.
    - don’t expect yourself to be fluent in 6 months, unless you’ve got fuck all else in your life that’s not going to happen
    - don’t be soft on yourself. The most irritating excuse I heard from ex pats in France was ‘it’s easier for kids’ so about 75% of them ended up not bothering and not speaking French to even a basically acceptable standard.
    - Don’t be concerned about making a tit of yourself practicing ‘on the street’. You will make a tit of yourself from time to time but nowhere near as much as you think you do. Failure is part of the learning process.
    - Immerse yourself in an activity you enjoy that also forces you to speak the language - an activity where no one else in the group speaks English. This can make your brain hurt but it does take away the safety net.

    In short it is hard work, there aren’t many short cuts but, as you progress, learning a foreign language can be one of the most mentally rewarding experiences in life.
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