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Caption competition - what's in the box?

Lifers, what do you think is in Dom's box? 

Dominic Cummings leaves Downing Street with immediate effect  The Northern  Echo
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Comments

  • A map to Baynard Castle
  • BJ’s severed head
  • Covid Vaccine.
  • Free vouchers for specsavers
  • Pictures of Boris and Chris Whitty chained to a bed naked with Matt Hancock standing over them with a leather whip. 
  • Large pencil case and nik-naks
  • Optometrist kit.
  • Larry the Downing Street cat. 
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  • edited November 2020
    Admissions from all the backwards folk that also broke lockdown rules and used Cummings as the reason why they did, believing it was justification for their own Cummings-esque selfishness and utter shitfestery.
  • House of Commons branded items to flog on ebay and enough free pens/post-it notes to stock his home office.  
  • BJ’s severed head
    Whats In The Box Se7en GIFs  Tenor
  • A "Sorry you're leaving, thank you for all your hard work" card signed by everyone at the Kremlin. 
  • Mark Francois
  • His supply of roadkill hedgehogs and weasels and badgers to get him through the covid/post brexit food shortages?
  • Nothing.  He just wanted to make it look like he actually did anything at No 10. 
  • agree with Golfie, his office wasn't at No. 10 and there are several other exits he could have used, he was deliberately making his departure very public
  • Chizz said:
    Lifers, what do you think is in Dom's box? 
    Carrie Symond's head?
  • BJ’s severed head

    Sounds like a price list item at a toothy brass's knocking shop.
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  • The last vestiges of Johnson's miniscule credibility?
  • A list of deranged, angry, bitter lefties that foam at the mouth every time someone mentions the words Brexit, Landslide or Red wall.
  • ‘Right’, said Dom. ‘if we don’t play it by my rules it is my ball and I’m going home.‘

    ‘Well fuck off said Boris’.

    Dom stood up and stamped his little feet. Tears of rage stinging the corner of his eyes. He would have liked to put Boris’s lights out, but when he thought that Boris May hit him back a little bit of pee seeped out.

    ’Right’ he said.

    There was silence while he tried to think of something really really nasty to say, but his mind was blank.

    ’Right’ he said again. 

    Then he picked up his ball, placed it carefully into his cardboard box and flounced out. ‘Just you wait’ he said to himself, ‘Just you bloody wait‘.
  • With time on his hands in the coming weeks, he decided to print off the entire CAFC Bonkers Shenanigans thread to read.
  • Jeremy Corbyns bollocks?
  • Southeastern timetables going back 20 years.
  • Chizz said:
    Lifers, what do you think is in Dom's box? 

    Dominic Cummings leaves Downing Street with immediate effect  The Northern  Echo
    As it appears to be from Q, I assume it's a Rolex that shoots poison darts into people, and a cigarette and toothpaste bomb.
  • some lego, a few matchbox cars, a teddy bear, a half empty pack of tena gentleman, his saver card for the coffee shop round the corner, a copy of 'Computing for Dummies' (unopened) and several dusty Percy Pig chews (vegan version)
  • some lego, a few matchbox cars, a teddy bear, a half empty pack of tena gentleman, his saver card for the coffee shop round the corner, a copy of 'Computing for Dummies' (unopened) and several dusty Percy Pig chews (vegan version)
    Did he win them all from The Generation Game?
  • I've no idea what's in the box, but I'm pretty certain which Lifer wrote the instructions:


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