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How reasonable / Considerate are you?

sillav nitramsillav nitram
edited September 2017 in Not Sports Related
In light of my recent post "Am I being unreasonable?"

It's intersesting to see opinion divided and why I posted.

I clearly felt I was being reasonable but and I'm not using this as an exscuse, my mind isn't always a good barometer of my thinking.

I think when one is personally involved perhaps the point of the issue often gets lost and as some suggested, it becomes a matter of principle,and then who is the most stubborn?

I guess backing down can seem like a defeat, but often to ensure a stress free life better to concede and move on, maybe?

I've always thought of myself as a reasonable / considerate person but obviously not in some people's eyes and it's good to have the other point of view but that doesn't necessarily mean that the other is right either.

I think I'm a law abiding citizen? But do I break laws that I think are outdated or irrational? I can't particularly think of anything but I'm sure I do consciously or unconsciously.

I suppose a good example, of others doing it their way, are cyclists who move through red lights. I'm not wishing to make that the point of this post. In fact as I type, two cyclists have gone by, cycling on a, "No Cycling" footpath, clearly signposted.

Or do you ever drop litter, stub your cigarette out on the pavement (isn't that now against the law?)

So to be someone of principle or high morals but bend the rules when it concerns ourselves, is surely hypocritical?

How reasonable / considerate do you consider yourself and why do you perhaps ignore rules / convention?

To add, do you break the rules to suit yourself but expect others not too and be honest?
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    sillav nitramsillav nitram
    IdleHans said:

    Good question. I believe myself to be considerate, largely self-aware and empathetic, but have a huge amount of intolerance towards those who are not. People who park on the double yellows in the narrow high street I live on, people who drop litter anywhere, people who exhibit boorish, misogynistic or racist behaviour - I'd happily cut their throats and throw them in a pit.

    But more to the point, do you bend the rules to suit yourself?
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    charltonkestoncharltonkeston
    Very
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    sillav nitramsillav nitram
    cabbles said:

    Consideration is a big thing for me. Most people just aren't mindful of what's going on around them, and to be fair, a lot of people have a lot on their minds, but my particular gripes are. And I don't want to turn this into a general things that annoy you thread

    People just stopping when they're walking in front of you
    People not moving down the train or train platform so there are bottlenecks
    People spending an eternity just pondering at a supermarket aisle

    I just use these to highlight some examples of consideration

    I picked up on this when I started doing mindfulness. Are people actually aware of what the fuck is going on around them.

    It's a real skill just to be aware to listen. Same could be said of here. Are people aware and mindful of what they actually write as they type it. Not got anyone in mind personally, and I include myself. Sometimes we get so carried away in wanting to make our points, but it could be interpreted very differently.

    I'm not saying we procrastinate and never write anything, I'm just highlighting it's a difficult skill to manage. To be aware, to be considerate

    Sometimes I'm aware, other times I'm not.

    Agree but more to the point, do you ever bend the rules, to suit your wishes?
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    cabblescabbles
    sillav nitram said:

    cabbles said:

    Consideration is a big thing for me. Most people just aren't mindful of what's going on around them, and to be fair, a lot of people have a lot on their minds, but my particular gripes are. And I don't want to turn this into a general things that annoy you thread

    People just stopping when they're walking in front of you
    People not moving down the train or train platform so there are bottlenecks
    People spending an eternity just pondering at a supermarket aisle

    I just use these to highlight some examples of consideration

    I picked up on this when I started doing mindfulness. Are people actually aware of what the fuck is going on around them.

    It's a real skill just to be aware to listen. Same could be said of here. Are people aware and mindful of what they actually write as they type it. Not got anyone in mind personally, and I include myself. Sometimes we get so carried away in wanting to make our points, but it could be interpreted very differently.

    I'm not saying we procrastinate and never write anything, I'm just highlighting it's a difficult skill to manage. To be aware, to be considerate

    Sometimes I'm aware, other times I'm not.

    Agree but more to the point, do you ever bend the rules, to suit your wishes?
    Erm. Can only really think of speeding to be honest. Do you have any specific examples you were thinking of
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    cabblescabbles
    With speeding I don't expect others to obey the rules, so I don't really have any double standards in that respect
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    sillav nitramsillav nitram
    cabbles said:

    sillav nitram said:

    cabbles said:

    Consideration is a big thing for me. Most people just aren't mindful of what's going on around them, and to be fair, a lot of people have a lot on their minds, but my particular gripes are. And I don't want to turn this into a general things that annoy you thread

    People just stopping when they're walking in front of you
    People not moving down the train or train platform so there are bottlenecks
    People spending an eternity just pondering at a supermarket aisle

    I just use these to highlight some examples of consideration

    I picked up on this when I started doing mindfulness. Are people actually aware of what the fuck is going on around them.

    It's a real skill just to be aware to listen. Same could be said of here. Are people aware and mindful of what they actually write as they type it. Not got anyone in mind personally, and I include myself. Sometimes we get so carried away in wanting to make our points, but it could be interpreted very differently.

    I'm not saying we procrastinate and never write anything, I'm just highlighting it's a difficult skill to manage. To be aware, to be considerate

    Sometimes I'm aware, other times I'm not.

    Agree but more to the point, do you ever bend the rules, to suit your wishes?
    Erm. Can only really think of speeding to be honest. Do you have any specific examples you were thinking of
    No I don't but I recently got done for speeding and while I can't say I was conscious of my attitude but clearly, I had a disrespect for the law and probably assumed I was not like anyone else and safe at the speed I was travelling.
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    ForeverAddicktedForeverAddickted
    Depends on my mood and if someone has already pissed me off...

    i.e. If I've held the door open for someone five minutes ago, if I dont get a thank you or response then I'm unlikely to bother for the next person

    In majority of cases I do try and be considerate with others have a laid back attitude to an observer I can look a bit of a push over (I rarely like confrontation) yet thats because I'm not actually bothered about doing something and will happily go along with something - If on the other hand I dont want to do something I'll really dig my heels in
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    cabblescabbles
    sillav nitram said:

    cabbles said:

    sillav nitram said:

    cabbles said:

    Consideration is a big thing for me. Most people just aren't mindful of what's going on around them, and to be fair, a lot of people have a lot on their minds, but my particular gripes are. And I don't want to turn this into a general things that annoy you thread

    People just stopping when they're walking in front of you
    People not moving down the train or train platform so there are bottlenecks
    People spending an eternity just pondering at a supermarket aisle

    I just use these to highlight some examples of consideration

    I picked up on this when I started doing mindfulness. Are people actually aware of what the fuck is going on around them.

    It's a real skill just to be aware to listen. Same could be said of here. Are people aware and mindful of what they actually write as they type it. Not got anyone in mind personally, and I include myself. Sometimes we get so carried away in wanting to make our points, but it could be interpreted very differently.

    I'm not saying we procrastinate and never write anything, I'm just highlighting it's a difficult skill to manage. To be aware, to be considerate

    Sometimes I'm aware, other times I'm not.

    Agree but more to the point, do you ever bend the rules, to suit your wishes?
    Erm. Can only really think of speeding to be honest. Do you have any specific examples you were thinking of
    No I don't but I recently got done for speeding and while I can't say I was conscious of my attitude but clearly, I had a disrespect for the law and probably assumed I was not like anyone else and safe at the speed I was travelling.
    Yes some people are very black and white when it comes to rules/laws and their moral compass and I respect that. Speeding is a good example. I'm sure many of us (myself included), have bombed it down the motorway at speeds that are illegal. we do it because for the most part, we can get away with it.

  • Options
    IdleHansIdleHans
    sillav nitram said:

    IdleHans said:

    Good question. I believe myself to be considerate, largely self-aware and empathetic, but have a huge amount of intolerance towards those who are not. People who park on the double yellows in the narrow high street I live on, people who drop litter anywhere, people who exhibit boorish, misogynistic or racist behaviour - I'd happily cut their throats and throw them in a pit.

    But more to the point, do you bend the rules to suit yourself?
    If I consider rules have been made by stupid people who haven't considered the impact of the rules they've imposed, then yes. But not to the extent that I've cut anybody's throat and thrown them in a pit. Yet.

    I have my own moral code, which I think is reasonable, and a lot of rules are made, quite justifiably, to keep people whose own moral code is deficient behaving in a civilised way. But I don't think I need to be told what to do because I'm not a c**t by nature. Though I do possibly swear a bit too much.

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    JiMMy 85JiMMy 85
    I live by the same rules as Larry David in Curb.
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    happyvalleyhappyvalley
    I am usually very considerate of others, but there is no way I'd give up my seat on a train to a disabled woman.
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    alan dugdalealan dugdale
    JiMMy 85 said:

    I live by the same rules as Larry David in Curb.

    Absolutely this. Was just about to post the same.
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    stonemusestonemuse
    I hate people so bollocks to them all





    :smile:
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    sillav nitramsillav nitram
    IdleHans said:

    sillav nitram said:

    IdleHans said:

    Good question. I believe myself to be considerate, largely self-aware and empathetic, but have a huge amount of intolerance towards those who are not. People who park on the double yellows in the narrow high street I live on, people who drop litter anywhere, people who exhibit boorish, misogynistic or racist behaviour - I'd happily cut their throats and throw them in a pit.

    But more to the point, do you bend the rules to suit yourself?
    If I consider rules have been made by stupid people who haven't considered the impact of the rules they've imposed, then yes. But not to the extent that I've cut anybody's throat and thrown them in a pit. Yet.

    I have my own moral code, which I think is reasonable, and a lot of rules are made, quite justifiably, to keep people whose own moral code is deficient behaving in a civilised way. But I don't think I need to be told what to do because I'm not a c**t by nature. Though I do possibly swear a bit too much.

    I suppose we may all think that at times but if rules have been made by those that can enforce them, should we not observe them, however much we think they're foolish or appear not to make much sense.

    Road signs often appear to be a case in point? Often I don't get why a road is no entry, no right or left turn but then I'm not a planner and not behind the thinking of it.

    I do sometimes park illegally, when I can't find a parking space and only nipping into the shops but then moan like fuck when I find a ticket on my return but no ones fault but mine, even if my parking seems not to be obstructing anything.

    Is it just a case of, if we can get away with it we will but moan when others do it?
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    iainmentiainment
    edited September 2017
    On the whole I'm much worse on the internet than in person. I don't know why. In person I get compliments at work for my respect and consideration for residents and colleagues, I'm seen as a good, reliable team player. In my personal life I get on well with people and I'm affable and respected.
    Internet brings out some of the worst of me.
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    kings hill addickkings hill addick
    I tend to follow rules. I tend to be (or aim to be) considerate to others. Ironically I'm much less accommodating from behind a screen than I am in person. I have been known to write things on here that I wouldn't say in person, even if I believe that they are right. It all comes from the paranoia of having people not like you but, for some reason, that doesn't seem to matter so much when the people in question are faceless strangers the otherside of the internet.

    However, even though I am a stickler for the rules I have been known to watch the odd football match on a channel that I don't subscribe to, personally. So I am a hypocrite as well as a coward - what a great combination eh?
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    sillav nitramsillav nitram
    stonemuse said:

    I hate people so bollocks to them all





    :smile:

    Truth be known, so do I ;)
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    sillav nitramsillav nitram
    iainment said:

    On the whole I'm much worse on the internet than in person. I don't know why. In person I get compliments at work for my respect and consideration for residents and colleagues, I'm seen as a good, reliable team player. In my personal life I get on well with people and I'm affable and respected.
    Internet brings out some of the worst of me.

    But do you break the law, however small it might be?
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    iainmentiainment
    sillav nitram said:

    iainment said:

    On the whole I'm much worse on the internet than in person. I don't know why. In person I get compliments at work for my respect and consideration for residents and colleagues, I'm seen as a good, reliable team player. In my personal life I get on well with people and I'm affable and respected.
    Internet brings out some of the worst of me.

    But do you break the law, however small it might be?
    I think we all do from time to time. As I get older I find I have more contempt for stupid laws though. And would support those who break them. I'm thinking currently about the actions being taken against anti frackers.
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    addick1965addick1965
    edited September 2017
    I am very considerate and very reasonable,polite to a fault and haven't killed anyone that has pissed me off for over a week now.

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    Wheresmeticket?Wheresmeticket?
    edited September 2017
    I always finish her off. It really annoys me when this is not reciprocated.
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    HuskarisHuskaris
    I'm very considerate in person, although more or less anything cabbies mentioned above would lead to me losing my shit and letting people know they are idiots. People that think they have the right to impose their stupidity and unawareness on the people around them really annoys me.

    One thing I would add is people who think it's fine to push in at the escalators on tubes in order to beat the queue of people. I would happily punch someone in the face who does that, also people who try and get on the tube before people get off. Again, there is a special layer in hell for them. Basically anyone that thinks that the rules apply to anyone but them make me lose it.

    A lot of people in our society have never been corrected, and they need correcting.

    As for bending rules for myself, apart from as rabbies above mentioned, speeding, never. Do unto others as you would have done unto you.

    Other than that I would do anything to avoid a confrontation.
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    charltonJcharltonJ
    Stuff all that
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    sillav nitramsillav nitram

    A lot of people in our society have never been corrected, and they need correcting.

    This wasn't you?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc0_SYZJfzU
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    HuskarisHuskaris
    sillav nitram said:


    A lot of people in our society have never been corrected, and they need correcting.

    This wasn't you?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc0_SYZJfzU

    That is exactly what was in my head as I typed it funnily enough. I really wish I could roll my r's
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