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Teacher/school stories

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  • 1980. We had this high-tech room called 'The Language Lab', where some French and German lessons took place. It was basically a lesson broadcast on tape. Each pupil sat in a little booth, with headphones, and the teacher sat at a console up front. Within each booth was a button marked 'Help', whereby you could alert the teacher if you required assistance on a certain word, phrase or spelling, etc. There was bank of lights in the main console, all numbered, so that the teacher would know who required assistance. And in each booth was a little counter, where the tape started on '000' and the numbers progressed as the tape played. I think the idea was that each pupil could do the lesson at their own pace, controlling their tape by rewinding and re-listening as required.
    Anyway, someone found out that when a pupil pressed 'Help', a light would show on the teacher's console and a buzzer went off. So, before the lesson commenced, we'd all agree on a certain number, to occur some way into the lesson. No-one would rewind their tape. We'd all let it run from '000' and await the fun. Mr L would be up in the console, having a little shut eye, when at, say '685', everyone would simultaneously press the 'Help' button, whereby the console went off like NASA Mission Control, poor Mr L would jump out of his seat and we'd all be heads down, playing innocent. "Must have been a power surge, Sir".
  • I did set fire to the science classroom and blow all the electrics, whilst miss Phelps exposed her breasts due to being pissed and asleep with her blouse unbuttoned cam only assume she didn't realise upon entering class, she stank of booze that afternoon fortunately the sprinklers coming on awoke her
  • We had a temp classroom behind the stage so windows went down to floor level. Every couple of weeks Steve Tester used to come in and apologise for lateness, walk to the back and shin out the window when teacher turned round, walk round to classroom door and enter "sorry I'm late sir". Great to count how many times he could do it before teacher cottoned on.
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