A tortoise went to the police station to report an incident in the park. He said, "I've been mugged by six snails!" The policeman said, "Can you explain in detail please." "No I can't," replied the tortoise. "It all happened so fast."
An Englishman, a Welshman and a Pakistani are all in the maternity ward together, their partners have all given birth to baby boys.
Unfortunately, there's a mix up with the doctors, nurses and the birth certificates and due to administrative issues, no-one knows who's child is who's.
The lead nurse explained the situation and the gentlemen in question agreed they'd go in to the baby ward one by one and they'd instantly know which child is theirs.
Purely by alphabetical order, the Englishman is asked to enter first, and after a few moments re-emerges from the room, holding what is very clearly a Pakistani newborn boy. When the Pakistani man surmises as such, the Englishman replied:
"I know that mate, but one of the other 2 in there is the spawn of a sheepsh*gger, and I'm not taking any chances"
Comments
Unfortunately, there's a mix up with the doctors, nurses and the birth certificates and due to administrative issues, no-one knows who's child is who's.
The lead nurse explained the situation and the gentlemen in question agreed they'd go in to the baby ward one by one and they'd instantly know which child is theirs.
Purely by alphabetical order, the Englishman is asked to enter first, and after a few moments re-emerges from the room, holding what is very clearly a Pakistani newborn boy. When the Pakistani man surmises as such, the Englishman replied:
"I know that mate, but one of the other 2 in there is the spawn of a sheepsh*gger, and I'm not taking any chances"
Drainpipe trousers…… Da boom tish.
Did you hear about the time Sir Isaac Newton mistakenly put Bisto in his Earl Grey?
He discovered gravy tea.