You might not realise but my boy and I (blimey already in posh mode) won the recent Charlton life auction for a pair of supporters to go to any away game and spend time in the directors box. We chose Barnsley as it was a couple of days days before Daves 28th Birthday. I rather foolishly agreed to do a write up of our experience.
Suddenly its here and I have just realised that I don't really know about the equiette for the day, we realise that you got to be smart and wear I tie, (that will break Daves heart) but little things are worrying me, things such as
1. Who will actually be there, will there be Charlton directors and how will I recognise them? Probably the only 2 people I would recognise would be Jim Davidson and Michael Grade. Not to worried about this to much because as we will talk to anyone.
2. When we score, is there anything we are not allowed to do, ie jump up and down, hug and kiss everyone in sight.
3. When the lads come over to celebrate, what is the correct wave to do, ie the royal wave or something else.
4. What colour rug should I take and is it acceptable for me to produce my Charlton flask or should I play safe and buy an unmarked flask?
5. Can anyone think of others things which might be unacceptable to do / say / wear. Don't forget we are representing Charlton life.
Please, apart from 1. Above I am looking for light hearted replies, on Sunday time allowing I will try to do a write up on our whole day experience on this thread, anyone posting after 8:30 tomorrow are welcome, but I will be leaving at 8:15 so I won't be able to read your advice.
Regards
Kerry and Dave
0
Comments
Dickie Bird - Cricket Umpire
Darren Gough - Cricketer / Dancer
Michael Parkinson - Chat Show Host
2. You can stand up and cheer. Making nescafe signs at the home directors or joining in the Adams family song are considered going too far.
3. Clapping the lads off is OK. Usually get a good wave back from SCP and the players if we have won.
4. Very rude to take your own rug. Whippet fur rugs will be provided by the home team
5. As you are representing Charlton Life remember to NOT wear a cardigan (even if it was a fecking zip up jumper you never hear the end of it), no midget jokes and no "would ya's" about t'Barnsley chairman's wife.
Enjoy the day
get there early for the food, drinks, and atmosphere to soak up
2. You can only jump up and down if we score in the last 30 seconds as you will otherwise be embarrassed as it is common CL knowledge that any earlier goals mean we will then throw it all away...or is that only at home?
3. Now we have won two at home it is common CL knowledge that our away form will fall away so you will not need to worry about us winning.
4. Barnsley is probably the coldest place in the UK so I would suggest you take 10 different rugs and thermos flasks. Doesn't matter if they are CAFC branded flasks as your hands will freeze to the side of them and hide the marking anyway!
5. I suggest you decide before the game which out of your son or you will be the "rose tinted" fan who spends the whole time singing SISS and talking about their big balls and which will be the glass half empty that slags off Powell, the Board or a whipping boy of your choice.
Hope that helps.
Ps whilst as Henry has advised you should definately not play "would ya" with the Barnsley chairmans wife it is your job to take a picture of her rack and pass it on to Big Rob (think that was his log in!).
Final recommendation is please ensure you take OperationPig so that he can translate for you (and keep you posted on the Massive result which you would be very upset not to hear about immediately).
As Henry said, Chris Parkes and his wife Sue are ALWAYS in the away section of the Directors' Box in foreign parts and are very supportive of the team , so not a bad idea to follow their lead.
I always look for them from the away end ...Not difficult to pick out with Chris' shock of silver hair and Sue's bright Charlton scarf.
Let's bring those 3 points back to SE7 !!!
"Get yooar cake-ole around this". The signal to commence dining.
"How do" or "Nah then". Considered a satisfactory form of greeting when entering the Director's box!
"That's champion". The accepted celebratory phrase upon a Charlton goal!
"By gum". At any event not entirely to your liking!
"Owt up lad"? Considered a polite remark to a Barnsley player at any unfortunate incident that befalls him!
"Tha's tekkin mickey, beeoffwiyer". The accepted response to any verbal abuse from Tykes.
Enjoy t'match CK and remember "eat all, sup all and pay nowt"!