Inland Revenue....good God!!

SoundAsa£

I have just been reliably informed that in the event of a nuclear attack on The UK that there are interim plans in place to start collecting taxes again six months after the event.
Makes you wonder who these paper hats are that must sit around on commitees and think these scenarios through....and on top of that they actually then come up with a solution/plan of action.
Drop a bomb tomorrow and they wouldn't see a penny of my money....then again neither would I............ I assume.

Oggy Red

[cite]Posted By: SoundAsa£[/cite]Makes you wonder who these paper hats are that must sit around on commitees and think these scenarios through....and on top of that they actually then come up with a solution/plan of action.

Don't worry, SoundAs ....... you and everybody else pays tax to employ these numpties who spend their day doing nothing practical or productive.

But take pity ....... they quite possibly wouldn't know where to start in a real world business - that's if they could get a job in the commercial market in the first place.

Leroy Ambrose

[cite]Posted By: SoundAsa£[/cite]I have just been reliably informed that in the event of a nuclear attack on The UK that there are interim plans in place to start collecting taxes again six months after the event.
Makes you wonder who these paper hats are that must sit around on commitees and think these scenarios through....and on top of that they actually then come up with a solution/plan of action.
Drop a bomb tomorrow and they wouldn't see a penny of my money....then again neither would I............ I assume.

'Reliably informed' by whom? What scale of nuclear attack? How much of the UK would need to be devastated before the 'six month' tipping point is reached? What form of tax collection would be employed?

Either the nuclear attack completely annihilates everyone (not much need for taxes in that event) or people continue to pay taxes from the day after it happens. Why would anyone think there was some form of a 'tax holiday' after a nuclear attack?

Christ almighty people believe some old shite.

Chunes

You'd want the country to get back on its feet as soon as possible wouldnt you?

Floyd Montana

I am quite looking forward to nuclear armageddon as I have been successful in my application to be a post-apocalypse tax collector.
I cant wait for my new job to start

SoundAsa£

[cite]Posted By: Leroy Ambrose[/cite]

[cite]Posted By: SoundAsa£[/cite]I have just been reliably informed that in the event of a nuclear attack on The UK that there are interim plans in place to start collecting taxes again six months after the event.
Makes you wonder who these paper hats are that must sit around on commitees and think these scenarios through....and on top of that they actually then come up with a solution/plan of action.
Drop a bomb tomorrow and they wouldn't see a penny of my money....then again neither would I............ I assume.

'Reliably informed' by whom? What scale of nuclear attack? How much of the UK would need to be devastated before the 'six month' tipping point is reached? What form of tax collection would be employed?

Either the nuclear attack completely annihilates everyone (not much need for taxes in that event) or people continue to pay taxes from the day after it happens. Why would anyone think there was some form of a 'tax holiday' after a nuclear attack?

Christ almighty people believe some old shite.

Well well well Leroy(Mr Knowall)....I met a Vulcan Bomber pilot a few days ago at The Vintners Hall in the City of London...it was at a memorial service for a good friends mother...his name is Wing Commander Peter Crowe. His wife is a friend of my brother in law and sister from Waddington where the Vulcan squadrons were based for many years.
I looked his name up on Google and found a very interesting thread regarding Vulcan bomber crews.
One of the navigators, who was stationed at an air base somewhere in The UK a few years back following the dismantling of the Vulcan squadrons(I admit I don't remember where off hand), was privy to various pieces of information re various scenarios following a nuclear attack which he and other crew members were given access to and asked to digest.
He states quite clearly that (amongst other quite interesting details which he felt he could safely divulge) that this was part of a planned scenario following a nuclear strike.He was amazed that this had been looked into and related his thoughts regarding this as well as one or two other contingencies.
It goes without saying that numerous possibilities could happen (any fool would realise that) but did clearly state that were it practicaly possible this would be put into action.
This isn't some silly current piece of internet gossip designed to get a reaction from me and the general populous but comes from a well respected poster on a Vulcan bomber crew message board (albeit a few years ago).Take it up with him Leroy if you think it's bollox.
Night night.

Leroy Ambrose

I don't have to take it up with him. It can't be anything but bollocks, because the whole thing makes no sense.

SoundAsa£

[cite]Posted By: Leroy Ambrose[/cite]I don't have to take it up with him. It can't be anything but bollocks, because it doesn't make any sense.

Oh dear oh dear...isn't that the point he/I was trying to make!

Leroy Ambrose

[cite]Posted By: SoundAsa£[/cite]

[cite]Posted By: Leroy Ambrose[/cite]I don't have to take it up with him. It can't be anything but bollocks, because it doesn't make any sense.

Oh dear oh dear...isn't that the point he/I was trying to make!

That's not what I meant. What I meant was that there's no feasible reason for any quango to ever have existed - because taxation would never stop (unless the entire country were wiped out, as I said earlier). Nothing like old soldiers (or, in this case, airmen) for telling stories. I had an uncle who told me about the numerous battles he fought in the spanish civil war (despite being about ten at the time)

SoundAsa£

Funnily enough I have an uncle who fought in the Spanish civil war.
He was a Basque by the name of Fransisco Villagrasa.
I recently went to his 90th birthday held in Irun, he married my fathers sister.
He was interned by the Vichy French but he and his lifelong friend Jose Ramon escaped and got to north Africa where they joined the British forces to fight against the Nazis.
After the war he couldn't return to Spain (San Sebastian) and was brought to The UK where he lived for for many years until the amnesty.
He married my fathers sister(circa 1946/47).............. in New Cross of all places.

Addickted

Didn't Franco use to be a tax collector?

AFKABartram

Just checked with George my local newsagent, and in the event of a nuclear attack, i am reliably informed he plans to reopens within 3-4 weeks, but he did say at that at the most recent gathering of the Sidcup and Old Bexley branch of NANA (Nuclear Attack Newsagents Association), that Vikram from The Oval said he could amazingly do it within 2-3 weeks. Unbelievable.

IA

[cite]Posted By: AFKABartram[/cite]Just checked with George my local newsagent, and in the event of a nuclear attack, i am reliably informed he plans to reopens within 3-4 weeks, but he did say at that at the most recent gathering of the Sidcup and Old Bexley branch of NANA (Nuclear Attack Newsagents Association), that Vikram from The Oval said he could amazingly do it within 2-3 weeks. Unbelievable.

Small businesses will find any way to get around paying taxes.

soapy_jones

Well thats good then. I would hate to survive a nuclear holocaust only to find that I cant get the latest copy of Nuts or FHM.

3blokes

Just wondering how it would pan out if there was a nuclear attack while there was a match at the valley?
Presume the ref would have to add a few extra minutes on at the end.

Henry Irving

[cite]Posted By: soapy_jones[/cite]Well thats good then. I would hate to survive a nuclear holocaust only to find that I cant get the latest copy of Nuts or FHM.

But unless I can get a copy of the Daily Mail I won't know which members of the royal family survived or which set of immigrants to blame for the attack.

[cite]Posted By: SoundAsa£[/cite]Funnily enough I have an uncle who fought in the Spanish civil war.
He was a Basque by the name of Fransisco Villagrasa.
I recently went to his 90th birthday held in Irun, he married my fathers sister.
He was interned by the Vichy French but he and his lifelong friend Jose Ramon escaped and got to north Africa where they joined the British forces to fight against the Nazis.
After the war he couldn't return to Spain (San Sebastian) and was brought to The UK where he lived for for many years until the amnesty.
He married my fathers sister(circa 1946/47).............. in New Cross of all places.

No pasarán!

Henry Irving

[cite]Posted By: 3blokes[/cite]Just wondering how it would pan out if there was a nuclear attack while there was a match at the valley?
Presume the ref would have to add a few extra minutes on at the end.

Maybe the radioactive fall out would get the big screen working again.

Henry Irving

I had an uncle at Dunkirk. Does that count?

3blokes

Well at least for once you'd be able to eat the burgers with confidence ;-)

BDL

[cite]Posted By: Henry Irving[/cite]

[cite]Posted By: 3blokes[/cite]Just wondering how it would pan out if there was a nuclear attack while there was a match at the valley?
Presume the ref would have to add a few extra minutes on at the end.

Maybe the radioactive fall out would get the big screen working again.

Doubt that.

Actually if the four minute warning came up, what would you do? ;-)

For those youngsters (god did I really say that?) amongst us. We had four minutes warning to when the soviet bombs would go off.

Henry Irving

[cite]Posted By: BDL[/cite]

[cite]Posted By: Henry Irving[/cite]

[cite]Posted By: 3blokes[/cite]Just wondering how it would pan out if there was a nuclear attack while there was a match at the valley?
Presume the ref would have to add a few extra minutes on at the end.

Maybe the radioactive fall out would get the big screen working again.

Doubt that.

Actually if the four minute warning came up, what would you do? ;-)

For those youngsters (god did I really say that?) amongst us. We had four minutes warning to when the soviet bombs would go off.

I was sorting out loads of old books yesterday and found my copy of Protect and Survive so I'll be OK

SoundAsa£

Some lovely witty comments there folks...started my day off with a smile or two.

Mortimerician

[cite]Posted By: SoundAsa£[/cite]Funnily enough I have an uncle who fought in the Spanish civil war.
He was a Basque by the name of Fransisco Villagrasa.
I recently went to his 90th birthday held in Irun, he married my fathers sister.
He was interned by the Vichy French but he and his lifelong friend Jose Ramon escaped and got to north Africa where they joined the British forces to fight against the Nazis.
After the war he couldn't return to Spain (San Sebastian) and was brought to The UK where he lived for for many years until the amnesty.
He married my fathers sister(circa 1946/47).............. in New Cross of all places.

Out of Franco's death squads, Rommell and Milwall who did he like the least

SoundAsa£

Ha ha...it was Franco............... I can assure you of that.

Off_it

This thread is all tosh - the Inland Revenue no longer exists. I thank you.

Mortimerician

[cite]Posted By: SoundAsa£[/cite]Ha ha...it was Franco............... I can assure you of that.

I'm not surprised, complete monster, particularly to the Basques.

Leroy Ambrose

He wasn't too nice to the Catalans either...