Maiden Speech in the House of Commons

Valley Ant

As that nice Mr. Cameron would say "It's time for Change".
In my maiden speech to the House I would like to outline the changes I would like to see at my beloved Charlton.
1. Richard Murray needs to connect more with the fans.
For the younger element he should get an earring and walk into the Valley listening to an I-Pod.
For the older fan like myself maybe grow a comb-over?
2. Steve Waggott needs to beef up his business credentials.
He could do worse than be inspired by a past ICI Chairman and TV pundit and change his name to a more dynamic "Steve Harvey-Gardens".
3. Match day facilities.
We need to put pressure on the Fish & Chip shop in Woolwich Road so they use both fryers on Match days. I may not have to queue for the usual 30 mins for a bag of chips.
4. Match day announcer.
As a cost-saving measure get rid of the announcer and replace him with text messages, sorry "txt msgs", on the electronic scoreboard. As a bonus when we score it could text "da da da da, da da da da, dadadada da, da da da da".

I'm off to get my expenses. This new plug-in 52" monitor with added Sky Plus and drinks cabinet is just what I need to do my job properly.

Curb_It

i think the No. 4 would cause outrage but all others agree with.

adamtheaddick

My maiden speach would be done by bruce dickinson with a 50 foot eddy turn it to eleven "run to the hills...." think that would be quite apt for what the next four years will bring.

Maiden rule ok!