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What's the worst analogy you can compare to at the moment ??

edited December 2008 in General Charlton
Mine: We have a quaint old house, but it seriously needs a new roof. Trouble is we can't afford to get it done properly. We've tried rearranging the tiles in all sorts of ways, but its still leaking water and ruining the whole house.

CFGS: It is a bit like a failing marriage, you get the odd brightspot, but generally it is fucking depressing but you do not want to be the one to give up on it.

Comments

  • I've got a car - it's getting on a bit, things have slowly been getting worse over the past three or four years and now it's on its last legs. My usual mechanic moved away to set up a bigger garage and the three or four mechanics I've tried recently have not been able to make the car run properly. Problem is, it looks like I need to spend a shit load of money on fixing it properly or just buy a new one.

    Or get a bike ......
  • It's like the lyrics to "Up the Junction" by Squeeze
  • edited December 2008
    I think the nose-diving plane one is the best - can't remember who posted that.

    We're in a tale spin, Deon Burton's nicked the last parachute, flashing a smile to camera as he leaps out the exit door, while Phil Parkinson has got his foot planted on the dashboard battling to pull back on the stick and level out the damaged aircraft. There could be a dark sea or a jagged cliff face involved somewhere too.

    Perhaps Charlton should scrap the Red Red Robin and play the sound of a plummeting Spitfire as the players run out - might drown out the boos!
  • edited December 2008
    P/Pete driving to and from Swindon to visit an old flame, only to find she's run off with Rothko.
  • edited December 2008
    I would describe our currently form as like trying to watch someone pass a kidney stone with an elastic band wrapped round their giblets.

    Painful to see and largely unsuccessful
  • edited December 2008
    I think we're a luxury yacht with a broken rudder and a skipper who's just fallen over the side. The rest of the crew just don't know what to do and they keep pulling all of the wrong ropes and levers and it's just going nowhere. Now the yacht is stuck on a sandbank and waiting to get pulled off by a tug.
  • Simply what comes up, must come down. I think a feel posters on here, especially the clubbers will get the reference! You try and make it better but it keeps getting worse!
  • its like someone mis read the rules to a fire work display and ended up covering an old cat in petrol, set it alight, and thrown it off a cliff......
  • I think it is Ecclesiastes 3:1.


    To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
    A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
    A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
    A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
    A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
    A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
    A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
    A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
  • Up shit creek without a paddle...........
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  • edited December 2008
    Old Shep springs to mind...

    When I was a lad
    And old shep was a pup
    Over hills and meadows wed stray
    Just a boy and his dog
    We were both full of fun
    We grew up together that way

    I remember the time at the old swimmin hold
    When I would have drowned beyond doubt
    But old shep was right there
    To the rescue he came
    He jumped in and then pulled me out

    As the years fast did roll
    Old shep he grew old
    His eyes were fast growing dim
    And one day the doctor looked at me and said
    I can do no more for him jim

    With hands that were trembling
    I picked up my gun
    And aimed it at sheps faithful head
    I just couldnt do it
    I wanted to run
    I wish they would shoot me instead

    He came to my side
    And looked up at me
    And laid his old head on my knee
    I had struck the best friend that a man ever had
    I cried so I scarcely could see

    Old shep he has gone
    Where the good doggies go
    And no more with old shep will I roam
    But if dogs have a heaven
    Theres one thing I know
    Old shep has a wonderful home


    Charlton Athletic is like a member of my family and we are all feeling the pain.
  • edited December 2008
    Harringey Council. The terrible evidence is there for all to see yet the snivelling self serving scumbags still try to duck responsibility for their shortcomings.
  • A blind man given a shopping trolley as a guide...
  • Like the last tram rattling into the scrap yard at Penhall Road, Charlton hoping that a preservatiionist will turn up at the last minute to save it from extinction. No one did.
  • like when homer simpson placed his leg into quicksand, then tried to rescue that leg with his other leg, then tried to rescue his legs with an arm, then tried to rescue his legs and 1 arm with his other arm, and finally trying to pull all his limbs out with his head....

    ....can't remember the outcome, but hopefully a tow-truck would've come along to pull him to safety.
  • You've been following your favourite band since they were playing down the pub. They made it to the big time and after a while it got a bit stale and the lead guitarist leaves to try something else. You see a succession of guitarists come and go, and they go from playing the stuff you like to a load of experimental music/side projects/self indulgent twaddle. Worst of all, the permanent band members ebb away and you find guest musicians making up more of the band than is healthy. You keep going to see them out of loyalty, but really you just want to hear the old stuff, but these blokes can't play it properly. Although you had great times watching them down the pub, you don't really want to end up back there, but thats where they are headed.
  • In the words of Ian Holloway; "If we fell into a barrel of boobs, we'd come out sucking our thumbs".
  • sinking ship with a dead skipper and rats bailing out
  • Like having an old rusty bike that you used to go everywhere on without it ever letting you down, then some posh kids from down the road borrow it for a couple of years, give it a complete make over but get bored after a while take off the added extras and then hand it back. Now you have what resembles your old bike but you cant even get the fcking wheels to go round....
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  • LIke myself playing football,
    Used to be half reasonable!!
    Then started to think I was still half reasonable!!!
    Then stopped thinking I was half reasonable!!!!
    Now I'm very poor at football,
    I know I'm very poor at football.
    But It was me wearing the shirt, I am to blame.

    (And then I knew when I wasn't good enough when I'm a substitute for a internet side, still I could blame the manager ;-)
  • Charlton are like a black sheep, banned from nursery rhyme and destined to dissapear from british culture foever.
  • well I thought my analogy was sound yesterday but it just seemed to offend people, which I never ever intended, but it just seemed to sum up the utter desolation and helplessness that we are all feeling at the moment.

    C'mon you Addicks
  • edited December 2008
    The Conservative Party between 1990-2005. They had Margaret Thatcher, who had led them to great things over many years but became unpopular, even though they were still winning under her.

    Then they tried four new managers in quck succession - John Major, who had held lots of jobs but had not really made much mark in any of them ; William Hague, who was a decent enough man but patently out of his depth ; Iain Duncan Smith, who talked the talk and walked the walk but ultimately was a disaster who didn't have a clue; and finally Michael Howard , who was appointed as pretty much a caretaker after his three predecessors had all failed. The faithful then all began to wish Thatcher would return, but that just wasn't a realistic option because she had moved on and you just can't turn the clock back.

    Charlton in 2008 are stuck where the Tories were in 2005.

    But the story does get better, believe me. They then found David Cameron, who took them to a ten point lead. And although that lead has since been cut back a bit, Team Tory is still well-placed for promotion, certainly in contention for a play-off place.

    The question is : where is our David Cameron? You dont have to like him (and personally I don't). But a good manager learns from the team that is winning, steals both their kit and their tactics and by doing so, eventually catches them up and overtakes them...
  • That dog ain't looked right for ages, the little bugger used to jump up and bite me and be well up for going out chasing squirrels and manky tennis balls but he just sort of falls up now.

    Still we're out now, I'll have a fag and launch the tennis ball off for the dog to chase, he used to be a lot quicker than that.

    That poxy dog has lost the tennis ball now he hasn't got anything to chase, whats gonna keep him excited now until its the end of walkies. Need another distraction.

    He's bloody biting me now at the end of walks, I just don't wanna take the little basket out any more at the end of a day if he's gonna be like this.

    I'm still taking you out I say to the dog else he'll shit on the floor and drive mum up the wall then there'll be rows galore and the poor little shit will get used to not going out.

    Oh joy he's found excitement, his eyes ain't what they used to be and he thinks chasing children is more fun than balls. I bet he's wanted to knock one of those lads over for years but been contented chasing the tennis ball, oh great the boys hurt himself on the dogs mouth. That wasn't as much fun as we thought it would be was it dog? No just for the sake of some exctitement you had to chase something because you were bored and wanted a change.

    Now we can't go up that field anymore and the dogs getting slower, he don't wanna go out now. We never got his balls done, always such a sensible well behaved dog, great for families. Then time for doggy rape and he can't be controlled anymore to not be let off his lead, it'll do too much long term damage to someones pet. Then he's f*cked, only limps, his legs have gone and it's time for a trip to the vets to have a kip. It was great while it lasted dog, but these things can't last forever nothing happens the same way twice and all that.

    We had to put the dog down to move on but it's tought thinking of the old days and how things have changed now, the house ain't so noisy and theres lots less life about the place. Still might get a new pup, heard theres a new litter of pups in need of a run. Then although he might take a while to grow and be strong we can have just as much of a crack chasing things and going where we ain't meant to go. Not just yet though.

    Crap analogy I know but the closest thing I could loosely put to our situation at the moment ;-)
  • I think I win the bad analogy contest with this one
  • It reminds me of Netaddicks, in the beginning it was all new & exciting, people got on & the debates were healthy. Then spotty Nigels like SuperPalace kept coming on & giving it the biggun' which drove some people away. Shortly after the Two Sheds/AnAppyAddick war broke out & the board quickly fell to rack n' ruin - then just when everything seemed lost Reams came along.

    Only things didn't get better, they got far, far worse as Reams picked fights with anyone who disagreed with him & told endless stories about when his dad was Assistant Manager to Lennie.

    Then it dissapeared.
  • [cite]Posted By: Oakster[/cite]It reminds me of Netaddicks, in the beginning it was all new & exciting, people got on & the debates were healthy. Then spotty Nigels like SuperPalace kept coming on & giving it the biggun' which drove some people away. Shortly after the Two Sheds/AnAppyAddick war broke out & the board quickly fell to rack n' ruin - then just when everything seemed lost Reams came along.

    Only things didn't get better, they got far, far worse as Reams picked fights with anyone who disagreed with him & told endless stories about when his dad was Assistant Manager to Lennie.

    Then it dissapeared.

    ... Good times.
  • Woolworths
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