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Letters from Jordon Ltd

edited February 2008 in General Charlton
Received the following:

Dear Mr Goonerhater
Many thanks for your intrest in Mr Js new tanning product. Yes it is available in the cash and carry at Selhurst Park. You may be intrested to know it is also being promoted by Transport for London in stead of the day glow vests their Highways team wear.

Yours Alice


and

Dear Mr Goonerhater
Yes indead Mr J does have a new soft ware desk diary on the market. It tells you for weeks in advance of a meeting and then when you are the only firm to turn up it emails an excuse saying that the real meeting was 5 miles away. We have tested this over 10 years and find it works very well for us.

Yours Alice.

Comments

  • ha ha very good
  • edited February 2008
    I never got a reply to my letter either:

    Trying It On With Jordan
  • Dear Mr Goonerhater,
    Kind of you to ask but neither Mr J or CPFC have lost any balls. I cant be 100% but i dont tthink Mr J owns any.

    Yours Alice


    Dear Mr Goonerhater,
    I have asked Mr J bur he assures me that he has never been a "turn" at madam JO JOs.

    Your Alice
  • from jordan

    email to my self shut that fecking website down those bstds from charlton are at it again, what is wrong with my tan,hair and personality, those feckers especially that AFKA
  • edited February 2008
    Dear Mr Goonerhater
    although Mr J owns many cars he does not have the reg plate TWA8.Sorry i could not be of service.


    PS I dont understand the question re am i a babe or do i have a TV liecance.
  • edited February 2008
    Dear Mr Goonerhater,
    I can confirm there have never been any ventriloquists in Mr Js family and he is not one. Further i cant see how Mr Warnock could be related to Noocky Bear as he is a puppet. I have never seen Mr warnock sit on Mr Js knee ?

    Yours Alice



    Dear Mr Goonerhater,
    I clearly meant that NOOKY BEAR is the puppet not Mr Warnock.

    Yours

    Alice
  • Dear Mr Goonerhater
    Mr J knows many famous people and yes he does like to walk in the park. However i can not say if Mr J has ever walked in the park with George Michael.


    Yours Alice


    PS im a 72 year old great grand Mother so no Mr J hasnt "visited" lately.
  • Dear Mr Goonerhater,
    Mr J`s newest product is a Sat-Nav,(not a Tom Tom but JO-JO catchy eh ?)
    Its not on sale as yet, we seem to have a glitch in the software. Everytime we put SE7 into it it comes up with Lewisham,Blackheath or Greenwich.

    Yours Alice.





    Dear Mr Goonerhater
    I thought i answered your question about the missing balls before ? i cant see what that has to do with the Sat-Nav glitch ? but thanks for your suggestion on where we might mind some.


    Yours Alice.
  • Dear Mr Goonerhater,
    No Mr J does not wear a sash or a bowler hat and has never been a member of The Orange Order.


    Yours

    Alice
  • edited February 2008
    Dear Mr Goonerhater,
    Thank you for your concern.However Mr J wears the dark glasses as a fassion statement not because" he is boss eyed by self abuse".
    Further as i dont know all of our supporters i couldnt comment on the fact they are "all self abusers" (please dont use that horrid word withthe W).


    Yours
    Alice


    PS Thanks for the flowers the marigolds do go well with Mr Js tan.
  • Sponsored links:


  • Dear Mr Goonerhater,
    Mr J does not have a column in "Tanning Weekly" or "The Daily Satsuma" . He does have a weekly column in a quality paper The News Shopper which you may wish to read.
    Mr J is not related in any way to Judith Chalmers or some sort of ape from Borneo. This is quite offensive to Mr J and he is talking to his legal team.

    Regards

    Alice.




    Dear Mr Goonerhater,
    Mr J has his own reason for not submitting to a DNA test re your comments re Judith and the ape from Borneo.


    Regards

    Alice
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