The more people who talk about the effects of stress the easier it is for people to seek help and not be so worried about being judged - the only trouble is the right sort of help is not always available. It can be a real challenge to keep things afloat.
I went through a bad time in the mid 90s when I got divorced and then both my daughters were diagnosed with a degenerative life-limiting condition. There was little or no support from those around me who just seemed embarrassed if I tried to open up about feeling low. Things are getting better slowly....
Ive struggled for years, been addicted to class a's for 17 years as a mask for anxiety and depression. Ive kicked the drugs and havnt touched gear for 2 years now, i still wake up in a black cloud every few months for no apparent reason and have no method of clearing it. Im in that mode now, everything feels pointless and a waste of time. Sleeping at night is always an issue, yet I walk around like a hald dead zombie during the day.
Sorry to hear that mate, hope the current cloud lifts for you soon. Any new projects on the horizon?
Ive struggled for years, been addicted to class a's for 17 years as a mask for anxiety and depression. Ive kicked the drugs and havnt touched gear for 2 years now, i still wake up in a black cloud every few months for no apparent reason and have no method of clearing it. Im in that mode now, everything feels pointless and a waste of time. Sleeping at night is always an issue, yet I walk around like a hald dead zombie during the day.
Thanks for sharing @shine166, I hope it’s helped by doing so and I too hope it won’t be long before the cloud lifts.
If you ever want to chat you’re more than welcome to pm me.
I’ve also had my battle with drugs and alcohol but thankfully am 12 years clean and sober and while I’m often reluctant to admit it, I’m definitely better off without them.
We appear to be getting to the bottom of my issues, ironically 3 years since my Mothers death and although not something I'd considered particularly relevant and other than the upset that goes with losing a relative. It appears (according to experts) it maybe stress related depression, brought on after sifting through my Mums paperwork sometime after her funeral and in order to protect my family from finding things that may upset them about my Fathers suicide and then the assault on my sisters by a second husband. I stumbled upon a letter (dated 1969), describing how my Father was found by the police in some detail, and went on to discuss her second marriage and her husbands assault on my sisters and my questioning by the police at the time as I had suggested that I too was assaulted. As I've said before its not something I can remember now so I'm unsure as to what actually did happen. The sad part of the whole issue was my Mum names me in the letter as partly responsible for my Dad taking his own life and suggests I was making the whole episode up concerning her second husband in order to be the focus of attention of the police, I would have been "6" when my Dad died and 12 when the letter was written! I remember finding the letter, (I believe written to a social worker but not sent), and sitting reading it in my loft with tears in my eyes. Theres no doubting I was a little bastard and responsible for a lot of things but that, no way can I be held responsible for that (but maybe my head was thinking differently). Mum had obviously forgotten about the letter which I burnt in the garden that very night and remember thinking as I watched it burn F*ck me, I must upset her that day, and although we'd discussed Dads death, not in great detail and never was her second husband ever mentioned I certainly never got told she blamed me. I'm still struggling to come to terms with my problems and discussing it with strangers I find very difficult, on here its easy, I'm amongst friends and I type what think and it helps. I'm still waiting on Brain scan results and the bad days still out weigh the good, but there is a gradual equalisation.
We appear to be getting to the bottom of my issues, ironically 3 years since my Mothers death and although not something I'd considered particularly relevant and other than the upset that goes with losing a relative. It appears (according to experts) it maybe stress related depression, brought on after sifting through my Mums paperwork sometime after her funeral and in order to protect my family from finding things that may upset them about my Fathers suicide and then the assault on my sisters by a second husband. I stumbled upon a letter (dated 1969), describing how my Father was found by the police in some detail, and went on to discuss her second marriage and her husbands assault on my sisters and my questioning by the police at the time as I had suggested that I too was assaulted. As I've said before its not something I can remember now so I'm unsure as to what actually did happen. The sad part of the whole issue was my Mum names me in the letter as partly responsible for my Dad taking his own life and suggests I was making the whole episode up concerning her second husband in order to be the focus of attention of the police, I would have been "6" when my Dad died and 12 when the letter was written! I remember finding the letter, (I believe written to a social worker but not sent), and sitting reading it in my loft with tears in my eyes. Theres no doubting I was a little bastard and responsible for a lot of things but that, no way can I be held responsible for that (but maybe my head was thinking differently). Mum had obviously forgotten about the letter which I burnt in the garden that very night and remember thinking as I watched it burn F*ck me, I must upset her that day, and although we'd discussed Dads death, not in great detail and never was her second husband ever mentioned I certainly never got told she blamed me. I'm still struggling to come to terms with my problems and discussing it with strangers I find very difficult, on here its easy, I'm amongst friends and I type what think and it helps. I'm still waiting on Brain scan results and the bad days still out weigh the good, but there is a gradual equalisation.
A stable and loving childhood is the best thing you can give a child but sadly for a lot of kids that's not the reality. A lot of issues from childhood resurface in later life at times of stress and crisis - stuff you may have buried can return.
Get what support you can and find those you trust to talk to who won't judge you. Life might be hard but you can learn to cope.
The more people who talk about the effects of stress the easier it is for people to seek help and not be so worried about being judged - the only trouble is the right sort of help is not always available. It can be a real challenge to keep things afloat.
I went through a bad time in the mid 90s when I got divorced and then both my daughters were diagnosed with a degenerative life-limiting condition. There was little or no support from those around me who just seemed embarrassed if I tried to open up about feeling low. Things are getting better slowly....
Glad to hear that things are getting better for you.
Trying to talk to people about how you're feeling can be difficult. I think people don't know what to say unless they've had similar feelings. The thing is (for me anyway) they dont actually have to say anything or understand what I'm going through - it's just being there and listening without judging.
I opened up to a friend for the first time recently about my mental health problems as I was going through a bad patch and feeling a lot of self-loathing (I'm really good at that). She didn't say anything but just cuddled me. Made me feel that even when I'm in a bad state I could be loved.
The more people who talk about the effects of stress the easier it is for people to seek help and not be so worried about being judged - the only trouble is the right sort of help is not always available. It can be a real challenge to keep things afloat.
I went through a bad time in the mid 90s when I got divorced and then both my daughters were diagnosed with a degenerative life-limiting condition. There was little or no support from those around me who just seemed embarrassed if I tried to open up about feeling low. Things are getting better slowly....
Glad to hear that things are getting better for you.
Trying to talk to people about how you're feeling can be difficult. I think people don't know what to say unless they've had similar feelings. The thing is (for me anyway) they dont actually have to say anything or understand what I'm going through - it's just being there and listening without judging.
I opened up to a friend for the first time recently about my mental health problems as I was going through a bad patch and feeling a lot of self-loathing (I'm really good at that). She didn't say anything but just cuddled me. Made me feel that even when I'm in a bad state I could be loved.
Perhaps the mistake some people make when trying to show support, is feeling they have to say something but as you say @Arsenetatters it’s often about just being there and willing to listen, that really helps.
Time to Talk are wonderful. When I had my little spot of domestic strife 5 years ago, my GP referred me straight away, matched me up with a brilliant Counsellor, within 6 weeks wouldn't say I was cured but getting so much off my chest with someone totally independent from the situation was a catalyst for getting back on track. The "Pull Yourself Together" culture, hopefully is now a thing of the past.
Time to Talk are wonderful. When I had my little spot of domestic strife 5 years ago, my GP referred me straight away, matched me up with a brilliant Counsellor, within 6 weeks wouldn't say I was cured but getting so much off my chest with someone totally independent from the situation was a catalyst for getting back on track. The "Pull Yourself Together" culture, hopefully is now a thing of the past.
I don’t think the pull yourself culture will ever go unfortunately rock. It’s the same as the recent scandal re: Weinstein and Spacey etc. Little wins and shifts in behaviours over time hopefully, but you still get some ignorant tossers out there
Time to Talk are wonderful. When I had my little spot of domestic strife 5 years ago, my GP referred me straight away, matched me up with a brilliant Counsellor, within 6 weeks wouldn't say I was cured but getting so much off my chest with someone totally independent from the situation was a catalyst for getting back on track. The "Pull Yourself Together" culture, hopefully is now a thing of the past.
I don’t think the pull yourself culture will ever go unfortunately rock. It’s the same as the recent scandal re: Weinstein and Spacey etc. Little wins and shifts in behaviours over time hopefully, but you still get some ignorant tossers out there
When I was in a dark place 10 years ago I heard a lot of “pull yourself together” which as we all know just makes things worse.
It’s frightening how many people just think you need to man up. But that attitude still remains prevalent sadly.
Speaking to someone was my epiphany and it’s great to see so many on here who are talking things through. Keep on trucking peeps - you aren’t alone Lll&bh
Tremendous lad that has found the confidence to move on, speak up for others and cares genuinely. Still goes to games whenever he can, should be be one proud man.
Ive struggled for years, been addicted to class a's for 17 years as a mask for anxiety and depression. Ive kicked the drugs and havnt touched gear for 2 years now, i still wake up in a black cloud every few months for no apparent reason and have no method of clearing it. Im in that mode now, everything feels pointless and a waste of time. Sleeping at night is always an issue, yet I walk around like a hald dead zombie during the day.
Sorry to hear that mate, hope the current cloud lifts for you soon. Any new projects on the horizon?
Yesterday I won the chance to purchase a 20k banksy print for £500.... so things are on the up
Comments
I went through a bad time in the mid 90s when I got divorced and then both my daughters were diagnosed with a degenerative
life-limiting condition. There was little or no support from those around me who just seemed embarrassed if I tried to open up about feeling low. Things are getting better slowly....
If you ever want to chat you’re more than welcome to pm me.
I’ve also had my battle with drugs and alcohol but thankfully am 12 years clean and sober and while I’m often reluctant to admit it, I’m definitely better off without them.
Get what support you can and find those you trust to talk to who won't judge you. Life might be hard but you can learn to cope.
Trying to talk to people about how you're feeling can be difficult. I think people don't know what to say unless they've had similar feelings. The thing is (for me anyway) they dont actually have to say anything or understand what I'm going through - it's just being there and listening without judging.
I opened up to a friend for the first time recently about my mental health problems as I was going through a bad patch and feeling a lot of self-loathing (I'm really good at that). She didn't say anything but just cuddled me. Made me feel that even when I'm in a bad state I could be loved.
It’s frightening how many people just think you need to man up. But that attitude still remains prevalent sadly.
Speaking to someone was my epiphany and it’s great to see so many on here who are talking things through. Keep on trucking peeps - you aren’t alone
Lll&bh
And all strength to those of you on here whenever you need it x