Police were called to The Valley in the early hours of Sunday morning when a member of the post-match hospitality cleaning staff noticed that the Heart of the Club was missing and immediately notified the Authorities.
No senior members of staff were at the ground when the incident was reported but nevertheless a sizeable police team was called in to conduct a search of the entire premises. Despite this nothing was found.
When it was suggested that no senior staff members were expected to arrive at The Valley until Tuesday an incident room was set up in a derelict part of the building which was said formerly to have been a Ticket Office.
Calls were then put through to home or mobile numbers.
First to respond was Chris Parkes the Club Secretary – he was heard to say “Sue, Sue, do you know anything about this…..” before the line unfortunately went dead.
Next was Cliff Eager, a retired police officer himself, who had only recently been employed by the Club as a safety officer. When contacted he claimed that he had never been told anything about the Heart of Charlton Athletic whatever that was and that it was not mentioned in his job description.
“I’d like to help, of course I would but I’m busy looking at some of last season’s truly shocking footage.
Did you know that some evil-doers deliberately concealed their identity behind sinister looking Pinocchio masks and engaged in a very threatening street theatre event outside the ground?”
"I will track them down just see if I don't."
Non-executive board member Richard Murray refused to believe that the call was genuine.
“I know you're off the message board. Call me here one more time sunshine and I’ll have your ears cut off”.
Finally, CEO Katrien Meire was tracked down to a penthouse suite near London Bridge.
“Oui, Yes, I do remember being told about it when I first arrived but I didn’t think it was important….?
So, its missing you say?
So, boof, we just carry on without it right? Right?
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Comments
Positive enough for you?
If it doesn't work lets consign it to the dustbin .......admin?