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Best Lads Holiday (or ladettes) uncut!

edited March 2010 in Not Sports Related
Not what's your most beautiful destination blah, blah, blah

What's the best week of carnage with your mates 18-30 style, or weekend, or for the real hardcore 2 weeks of mentalism.

I can't decide between Gran Canaria 2005, Kavos 2002 or Magaluf 2004

Had some nutty ones before them golden years but nothing on them 3.

Bonus points for nickings, drunken run ins with hotelliers, hospitalisations and wake up destinations other than a hotel room.

The more vivid the story the better.
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Comments

  • Ha Ha, Zante '08 for me. Threesome with two birds from Essex on my first night out there, then the second night woke up in hospital with tubes hanging out my arms and having no recollection how I got there.
    Needless to say I was straight back out the same night on it, I needed a week off to recover AFTER my holiday!
  • Also, one of my mates took a sh!t in another mates pillow, I've never seen someone so angry after resting his head on stinking turd!
  • edited March 2010
    Magaluf about 6 years ago. Pints of vodka (half a pint of vodka) and redbull is about all I can remember.

    I may or may not have defecated in my own bed and then thrown the sheets off the balcony the next day. I am a scumbag I know.
  • The best stories always involve shite.

    Plus ten points to the both of you
  • edited March 2010
    Police turning up at our apartment and my mate who's pretty good with his Spanish history kept asking them if they were the 'Nazi' ones in Mallorca 09.
  • Magaluf 1986. The 25-year anniversery tour being planned now for September 2011. We think all 14 will make it. I literally laughed for 2 weeks.
  • Malia 2005 was pretty sweet, kavos 2007 takes some beating though!
  • Butlins (adults only) weekends 2000 x 2 ,2001 and 2002.
    Munich Octoberfest 2007
    Bena madena ( near portabanoose) stag week 2005. Starks,anyone thats been there will understand!
    Krakow stag weekend 2007. Ended up in hospital on this one thinking I was having a heart attack!
    Turns out I fell down some stairs in a club and tore my chest muscles.
  • Butlins (2008 Stag do) weekend 4-1 ratio of Woman/Men so easy and not enough sleep, constant drinking, going back in April but unfortunately with girls aswell so doubt will be as messy
    Madrid(2008 stag do) another messy one, constant drinking, tour of the bernabau, strip clubs, party back at some birds hotel which we sneaked into
    Malia 2007 i think, 20 of us, 12 lads and 10 days non stop drinking, partying etc

    Kavos twice last year once few girls & me and mate, and then a long weekend with just me and my mate really was quality and involved all the above apart from strip clubs

    Tenerife several times, first time was only 16 and woke up one morning i had pissed the bed then we went to the zoo with the family bus had to stop for me to be sick, then all around the zoo i kept being sick....my mum was so ashamed lol and found out that i started on a 30year old and nearly got arrested by the police cos they pulled my sisters mate who i was rooming with oops!

    Fun times!
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  • Boys jollydays.The memories.
    On the sh*t theme,crete in 97 rings a bell.My lazy fat mate ,fluff ,was forever nicking bog roll from the rest of the other lads rooms and would never put his hand in his pocket to go and get any which was rather inconsiderate as he spent a big majority of his time on most holidays in the carsey.We'd had enough,so while the fat F*** was out on the balcony having a smoke,we emptied his loaded wallet of drachmas,went to the local supermarket and bought enough andrex to stretch from landsend to john o groats.We must have spent about £50 on the stuff.then climbed to the top of the hotel roof,just above the balcony where he was sitting feelin happy with himself,and pelted him with the lot.
  • Some of these tales are brilliant!

    Not abroad but me and a mate went on a tour of our mates unis last year, ended up visiting 8 unis in 8 days, stretching from Southampton up to Durham, over 1000 miles in the end. Was on the lash everynight, ended up with a different bird at every uni except one halfway through (where I thought I'd give it a chance to recover :p), being very hungover in the mornings, sobering up and then driving to the next uni, before it all started again.

    And this was all after an idea 2 days before we left. Although I must admit it ended up being planned quite well so the maximum we had to drive between unis was an hour and a half.

    Absolutely epic week. Would recommend it to any students, broke the term up fantastically, and was just like going to somewhere like Malia, but without the sunshine! The random stuff we saw whilst driving as well was a particular highlight, and seeing as we were going to student bars and clubs, wasn't even that much to get wasted. Main expense was obv petrol, but split between us even that wasn't too bad.
  • you crazy kids!
  • June 2010 Portugal. Details to follow in 3 months...
  • [cite]Posted By: RedArmySE7[/cite]Threesome with two birds from Essex on my first night out there

    what a great start
  • edited March 2010
    [quote][cite]Posted By: choice[/cite]June 2010 Portugal. Details to follow in 3 months...[/quote]


    Will you video the threesome if you are lucky enough :)
  • Ahhhh good poo story. My brothers best mates stag do, also in Benidorm. There was 38 of us. Went to this restaraunt for a big of grub one evening, but had been on the lash all day. The stag, a big fat ginger fella, goes for a turn out. About 30 minutes pass and we tell my brother, as he is best man, to go check on him. Brother is banging on the door asking if he is alright, but only answer he gets is...''i cant find the f*cking light''. So my brother kicks down the door and is met but the groom sitting on the toilet, but he's aimed poorly. Jank all down his legs and in his pants.
    Brother has tried to clear him up best as he can, but now ginger is naked. Walks back through the restaraunt where everyone is told to leave pronto. Ginge then launches his dirty pants across the restaraunt and shouts ''ya call this a f*cking restaraunt''. 38 blokes have legged it.
    So, ginge is standing there, starko. Brother has gone in one of those little poxy shops to find some shorts for him. We are standing there pointing a laughing at ginge. Some doris walks down the stairs of her hotel and can only see the back of ginge........slaps his arse. Well, ive never heard a rupture of laughter quite like it. This girl had pony on her hand and her face i will never forget. Like something out of a sketch show.
  • [cite]Posted By: nickaspanner[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: choice[/cite]June 2010 Portugal. Details to follow in 3 months...


    Will you video the threesome if you are lucky enough :)

    might be difficult from where ill be laying
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  • [cite]Posted By: ValleyGary[/cite]Ahhhh good poo story. My brothers best mates stag do, also in Benidorm. There was 38 of us. Went to this restaraunt for a big of grub one evening, but had been on the lash all day. The stag, a big fat ginger fella, goes for a turn out. About 30 minutes pass and we tell my brother, as he is best man, to go check on him. Brother is banging on the door asking if he is alright, but only answer he gets is...''i cant find the f*cking light''. So my brother kicks down the door and is met but the groom sitting on the toilet, but he's aimed poorly. Jank all down his legs and in his pants.
    Brother has tried to clear him up best as he can, but now ginger is naked. Walks back through the restaraunt where everyone is told to leave pronto. Ginge then launches his dirty pants across the restaraunt and shouts ''ya call this a f*cking restaraunt''. 38 blokes have legged it.
    So, ginge is standing there, starko. Brother has gone in one of those little poxy shops to find some shorts for him. We are standing there pointing a laughing at ginge. Some doris walks down the stairs of her hotel and can only see the back of ginge........slaps his arse. Well, ive never heard a rupture of laughter quite like it. This girl had pony on her hand and her face i will never forget. Like something out of a sketch show.

    pmsl..that is legendary..pony on her hand too lol lol :-)
  • Remember on one lads holiday i managed to pull a huge bint that was staying in our apartment block.A real one tonne Annie.
    Went back to hers to climb on board(seem to remember she was pretty good between the sheets amazingly).Woke in the morning with a massive hangover and an even bigger bed partner.Couldn't get out of there quick enough.What i didn't know was that my mates had paid a visit to the building site over the road during the night,collected a load of bricks and rubble, and had aptly decided to build a brick shit house right outside 'Butterbeans' door.
    The following morning I duely smashed right into it in my haste to escape,while 14 blokes rolled around pissing themselves.
  • [cite]Posted By: carly burn[/cite](seem to remember she was pretty good between the sheets amazingly)

    lol...fat ones always are cb.
  • [cite]Posted By: AFKABartram[/cite]Ahh, these tales remind me of when i was young !

    My best was Gran Canaria 96. Euros had just finished, Cool Brittainia and all that, and there seemed to be a bit of a feelgood factor around. 9 of us went, where we went seemed to have a brilliant 50/50 male / female split, and every night was a great night.

    We all went back to the hotel one night to find one of our groups room had flooded really badly. Nothing to do with us. Reported it to reception. In the mean time we stupidly decided in this situation a water fight was called for, got ridiculously out of hand and a couple of us started urinating over each other (i know, i know). Unfortunately it was at this point the night porter appeared, next thing you know he's smacking everyone with his baton. Me and my mate got escorted out of the hotel, and we come up with the brainwave that we would sneak back in wearing other peoples clothes. I was little and slim, my mate big and fat. Another mate brought some clothes round the corner and we tried to walk back in wearing others clothes, none of which fitted us. Clocked immediately (it wasn't hard to work out, you don't see many people at 5am in August wearing a hat and coat), so the baton come out again, and we had to stay clear of the hotel until the 9am shift change. Ended up finding an all-night Irish club and got further drunk. Sneaked back in hotel at 9.05, just got to sleep when the manager knocked at 10am to throw all 9 of us out the hotel, we had an hour to pack and be out by 11am or the police would be called.

    Turfed out and didn't know what to do, but fortunately managed to find a rep who took pity on us, feel for a bit of an exaggerated sob story, and relocated us to the other side of the resort (nice place).

    Went out the next night, one of my mates pulled and went back to hers. Went to leave and realised he hadn't found out the name of our new hotel, didn't have a clue where it was, nothing. We found him in town the next day. That bloke was a legend that holiday. He was the only one of the group not working and came on a 2 week holiday wiith about £80. He would offer to do dares for beers, the greater the dare the more the beers. There had been a stage erected in the middle of the town square for a music festival, so we dared him 8 beers he would strip naked and run across the stage. So he took all his clothes off and gave them to us and off he went. Once he got on the stage, we all bolted in the other direction and fled into a busy shopping centre. We all split up in various shops with various bits of his clothing and i can still remember being in almost tears hiding behind a clothes rail and peering through seeing him running through the centre starkers shouting 'lads, come on'.

    Later that holiday he was asleep naked in his ground floor room, so 4 of us carried him out and chucked him in the pool. Literally the whole hotel turned out, but he got all coy and wouldn't get out the pool without a towel. After a few minutes another crowd of people come running up the stairs laughing their heads off. He had forgot there was a glass fronted bar underneath the pool, and where he had been leaning on the side, his fruit and nuts had been squeezing up against the bar window.

    New hotel also lost my passport and i didn't think i would get back, great days

    I never knew about the water fight and group uriniation in my hotel room? lololololol. Ah. The legend of Mr Pigger (nickname taken from Magaluf '95 to preserve his anonymity :-)
  • me and Cheesey, JD. Ended up rolling over Rich's bed whilst he was laid up with some bug.

    14 years ago :-(
  • Ayia Napa last year. 9 of us went for 10 days of carnage, which involved a mate getting stripped in the sea and having to run down a FAMILY beach with everything hanging out looking for his gear, with kids saying mummy whats that man doing. Drunken quad bike racing and a mate passing out with his shorts and pants down which looked like the perfect oppotunity to shot blue after sun up his arse. He was shitting blue for days lol. Also amazing beach parties, 3 litre buckets of cocktails for 10 euros and some great times. Going back this year :)
  • Some great storys guys.

    Malia 2006 was pretty uneventful. Swimming naked in a pool and then having to run from a bloke with a dog was pretty much it.

    Malia 2008 though was all down to my brother. Leave him chatting to a Scottish bird on the first night, I go for a little dance. Start talking to some doris from Leeds. Before I know it, I was getting ready to head back to hers. Turn round and my bro's left the scot and is taggin along, thinking we’re heading to another bar. Couldn’t leave the sod so early in the night so let the bird go.

    Then the next night, England had won in a qualifier. He starts giving it to some Scottish blokes. Thankfully, we got thrown out the bar before we got beat up.

    On the last night, he was determined to pull anything… and that’s what we did… Never met someone who's got they're own name tattooed on her back before. Very classy. And she ate my pizza on the way home.

    Still nothing major though. Will update after Shagaluf July 2010.
  • Blinkant - Shagaluf....buy a sweaty or a northerner a bag of chips and your in. I swear it works.
  • [quote][cite]Posted By: ValleyGary[/cite]Blinkant - Shagaluf....buy a sweaty or a northerner a bag of chips and your in. I swear it works.[/quote]

    Sounds good to me.
  • Also just remembered. My mate who takes pride in his nickname No Standards (for obvious reasons) for some reason decided that if he found a girl called Elaine she would be the uglyiest dog in the world. Don't ask why he must just think it's an ugly name. So for pretty much 3 hours we was wondering around shouting out Elaine until someone responded. And sure enough the girl weighed about 23 stone, had more facial hair then both of us put together and dribbled quite alot. Without a second thought he took her back to the room and done the business. I'm cringing writing this! The funny thing is her name wasn't even Elaine can't remember what it was now but she was just some big heffer from the Welsh valleys lol
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