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You know you're getting old when.

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  • cafcfan
    cafcfan Posts: 11,201
    Your consultant urologist looks about 20 and has dyed blonde hair.
  • letthegoodtimesroll
    letthegoodtimesroll Posts: 10,635
    edited February 2022
    thai malaysia addick said:
    When you kick a football that rolls your way back to some kids, resulting in most bones in your body hurting.
    Last time I did that I nonchalantly hit the sweet spot with little effort and it went back like a rocket straight at one of the young kids that were playing football…. then told them to go and play somewhere else…you know you’re getting old when…
    .
  • Covered End
    Covered End Posts: 52,040
    Fortune 82nd Minute said:
    When you watch a fa youth cup game, see someone called Hinshelwood is playing for the opposition and can remember both a Martin and Paul Hinshelwood playing for Palace.

    And then realising that the kid playing for Brighton is actually the grandson of Paul! 
    Team of the 90's.
  • DaveMehmet
    DaveMehmet Posts: 21,616
    You go to the gym for the 1st time since lockdown and can't even manage an hour. Cancelled my membership when they first reopened as I hadn't been jabbed and felt uneasy going, then managed to tear my rotator cuff muscle. Re-joined yesterday. Glad I've started again but am fucked.
  • Redvaliant
    Redvaliant Posts: 515
    Covered End said:
    Fortune 82nd Minute said:
    When you watch a fa youth cup game, see someone called Hinshelwood is playing for the opposition and can remember both a Martin and Paul Hinshelwood playing for Palace.

    And then realising that the kid playing for Brighton is actually the grandson of Paul! 
    Team of the 90's.
    And you're really old when you are out by a whole decade 😄
  • Stig
    Stig Posts: 29,053

  • Essex_Al
    Essex_Al Posts: 3,585
    When cutting your toe nails is like a full body work out!
  • T_C_E
    T_C_E Posts: 16,423
    When you see a tweet on behalf of Dr Dre and the first thing that springs to mind is…
    Not another Covid announcement! 
  • EugenesAxe
    EugenesAxe Posts: 3,324
    When your 12 and 13 year old children use Google to fact check everything you tell them…
  • iainment
    iainment Posts: 8,040
    Essex_Al said:
    When cutting your toe nails is like a full body work out!
    This. I’m seriously thinking of regular visits to a chiropodist.

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  • stonemuse
    stonemuse Posts: 34,030
    iainment said:
    Essex_Al said:
    When cutting your toe nails is like a full body work out!
    This. I’m seriously thinking of regular visits to a chiropodist.
    Yup, me too 
  • Alwaysneil
    Alwaysneil Posts: 13,819
    stonemuse said:
    iainment said:
    Essex_Al said:
    When cutting your toe nails is like a full body work out!
    This. I’m seriously thinking of regular visits to a chiropodist.
    Yup, me too 
    Try cutting them at shorter intervals then when you are going to our promotion games. 
  • thai malaysia addick
    thai malaysia addick Posts: 18,360
    When you throw your keys in the bin while firmly holding a screwed up piece of paper in your left hand.
  • DaveMehmet
    DaveMehmet Posts: 21,616
    thai malaysia addick said:
    When you throw your keys in the bowl while firmly holding a screwed up piece of paper in your left hand.

  • Gary Poole
    Gary Poole Posts: 1,874
    DaveMehmet said:
    thai malaysia addick said:
    When you throw your keys in the bowl while firmly holding a screwed up piece of paper in your left hand.

    That Ferrari keyring turned out to be a very sound investment 
  • iainment
    iainment Posts: 8,040
    When you lean down from a chair to pick something up and you fart.
  • Stig
    Stig Posts: 29,053
    getting old jokes photos an old geezer honey but i still love you if you can put up with an old Funny cartoons Funny cartoon pictures Funny old people
  • The Prince-e-Paul
    The Prince-e-Paul Posts: 6,693
    edited February 2022
    _MrDick said:
    When you accidentally stumble across some porn on Twitter and you’re disgusted
    You know you're getting old when.....

    If kids of today found a copy of Razzle, in a hedge, they'd throw it back in..... Whether the pages were stuck together, or not!! 
  • Six-a-bag-of-nuts
    Six-a-bag-of-nuts Posts: 8,130
    Your first bank account was with the Westminster Bank, your second was with the Midland Bank and your third was with Lloyds Bank. And then they became Lloyds TSB. And then they became Lloyds Bank again.
  • Solidgone
    Solidgone Posts: 10,218
    The Prince-e-Paul said:
    _MrDick said:
    When you accidentally stumble across some porn on Twitter and you’re disgusted
    You know you're getting old when.....

    If kids of today found a copy of Razzle, in a hedge, they'd throw it back in..... Whether the pages were stuck together, or not!! 
    Hopefully they would put it in the recycling bin afterwards.

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  • Solidgone
    Solidgone Posts: 10,218
    A person was walking buy scuffling their shoes. I heard myself say out loud, pick your feet up!
  • CharltonKerry
    CharltonKerry Posts: 2,963
    Six-a-bag-of-nuts said:
    Your first bank account was with the Westminster Bank, your second was with the Midland Bank and your third was with Lloyds Bank. And then they became Lloyds TSB. And then they became Lloyds Bank again.
    You realise that you had your bank account for over 53 years with Lloyds in all its forms. Buggers didn’t send me a 50th anniversary card.
  • guinnessaddick
    guinnessaddick Posts: 28,707
    Getting up before 5 on Saturday morning to take the dog out before heading off to Wigan, at least a gallon of Guinness getting home just before midnight. Having 4 hours sleep and then having to crash about 8pm last night. 
  • TelMc32
    TelMc32 Posts: 9,060
    guinnessaddick said:
    Getting up before 5 on Saturday morning to take the dog out before heading off to Wigan, at least a gallon of Guinness getting home just before midnight. Having 4 hours sleep and then having to crash about 8pm last night. 
    That cold Wigan pie you lifted from the press room probably had an effect as well!! 🤢😂😂
  • T_C_E
    T_C_E Posts: 16,423
    When you feel the groin tighten while you’re painting the skirting board. 
  • IdleHans
    IdleHans Posts: 10,982
    T_C_E said:
    When you feel the groin tighten while you’re painting the skirting board.

    Not heard that term before. Sounds filthy.
    At your age too!
  • AFKABartram
    AFKABartram Posts: 57,860
    Well it was Valentines Day. He had to leave it a good few hours before attempting to paint it again…
  • T_C_E
    T_C_E Posts: 16,423
    AFKABartram said:
    Well it was Valentines Day. He had to leave it a good few hours before attempting to paint it again…
    Two coats in the same day, those days are well gone!
  • Mendonca In Asdas
    Mendonca In Asdas Posts: 22,657
    edited February 2022
    You can remember James Milner making his debut at 16 for Leeds United, he’s just come on off the bench in the Champions league for Liverpool, his 800th game!
  • thai malaysia addick
    thai malaysia addick Posts: 18,360
    T_C_E said:
    AFKABartram said:
    Well it was Valentines Day. He had to leave it a good few hours before attempting to paint it again…
    Two coats in the same day, those days are well gone!
    I suppose if you ended on the floor it could be a matt finish.

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