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Ideas To Win A Derby Match

In recent years we seem to have lost the ability to compete and beat our nearest and dearest in a Derby match (Brentford , Welling & Leyton Orient aside , you know who i mean) so what is the answer ?

Play more academy lads , with a passion and more of an affinity with the club?

As Brian Clough famously did before a European Cup final let the lads go out on the lash the night before?

No win / no fee ( ie wages) if we lose?

What is the answer, how do we 'get the magic ' back, and avoid a weeks worth of ribbing from friends, family & workmates?
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Roland Out Forever!