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Chat up lines

GumboGumbo
edited March 2012 in Fun, Jokes & Captions
Just thinking with ball mouth coming up on sat! Anyone got any classic/cheesy/crap chat up lines

Man:- "you Irish love?"
Women:- "No why"
Man:- "coz everytime I look at you my cocks Dublin"

Great chat up line from a movie
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    Stu_of_KunmingStu_of_Kunming
    Dicko: "Can you hold my pint a second"
    Kets: "Sure thing"
    Kets: "What the f***"

    Seemed to work pretty well in blackpool!
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    adamtheaddickadamtheaddick
    I know ricky Gervais.. ;-)

    67% of the time it works everytime.

    Paddy from phoenix nights used a belter,

    "Alright love, nice legs.. what time do they open?"
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    RedArmySE7RedArmySE7
    "Piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiece"
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    PlaaayerPlaaayer
    Do you work for DHL? Because I saw you checking out my package.
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    PlaaayerPlaaayer
    Fancy a night at the Hilton?

    Worked last week.
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    BaldybonceBaldybonce
    For any bird of a foriegn persuasion.
    Have you got any English in you?
    No.
    Would you like some?
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    GumboGumbo
    "does this napkin smell of rolhypnole"
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    nth_london_addicknth_london_addick

    2 birds together walk over to them and ask one


    Do you like to dance

    if she says yes

    Tell her to fook off then cos i want to talk to your pal





    Alternatively

    Walk up to her and say i might not be the best looking bloke in here


    but i am the only one talking to you






    Or the one that serves me best




    Dont turn this rape in to a murder
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    MrOneLungMrOneLung
    "does this napkin smell of rolhypnole"
    Rohypnol doesnt smell - do you mean chloroform ?

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    bolloxbolderbolloxbolder
    NLA should be struck off for that.
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    O-Randy-HuntO-Randy-Hunt
    Me - Can I smell your f*nny

    Girl - F**k off

    Me - oh, must be your feet then
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    MrOneLungMrOneLung
    Me - would you like to dance?
    Her - no I would never dance with you?
    Me - you misheard me, I said that dress makes your arse look fat


    Surely the best chat up line is Hi, can I get you a drink.
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    GumboGumbo
    Either way same out come?!
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    adamtheaddickadamtheaddick
    There are 256 bones in your body! Would you like another?

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    PlaaayerPlaaayer
    Hello Mrs Wiseman.
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    Bryan_KynsieBryan_Kynsie
    Are you free later this evening? No? Oh alright, how much then?
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    DaveMehmetDaveMehmet
    Do you like fruit?

    Yes

    Then suck my c*ck it's a peach
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    tangoflashtangoflash
    This one works every time:

    Here love, drink this, it's fine..................
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    MCSMCS
    Have you ever had ya belly button licked.............. From the inside!
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    DeadredDeadred
    edited March 2012
    Back in the day before mobile phones it used to be

    bloke 'have you got 10p love?'
    girl 'no why?'
    bloke 'you need to give your mum a ring to tell her you won't be home tonight'
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    adamtheaddickadamtheaddick
    "whats that in my pocket you say.. just some gaffer tape and a stanley knife.. another drink?"
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    Chirpy RedChirpy Red
    "You look like my 3rd wife"

    "How many have you had?"

    "Two....."
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    cafcdave123cafcdave123
    just get your cock out and say

    "'ere love, get your laughing gear round that"
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    DeadredDeadred
    just get your cock out and say

    "'ere love, get your laughing gear round that"
    Subtle dave very subtle!
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    jdsd42jdsd42


    Hi ..yes i am a Millionaire ............sure to work
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    SuperCliveMendoncaSuperCliveMendonca
    Do you come here often?
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    adamtheaddickadamtheaddick
    "thats so funny i love hannah montana too..."

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    BIG_ROBBIG_ROB
    "Hello, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you"

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    Saga LoutSaga Lout
    "Ey up Luv! Those clothes would look great in a heap on my bedroom floor!".
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    DizzleDizzle
    Would you like one thats funny, but also a bit cheesey to make them laugh at the same time?

    You approach them and you say to them "Hey, look, feel this" and hand them part of your clothing. Maybe a cuff, maybe part of a jumper or shirt. They have a feel and usually look a bit confused. Then you say "do you know what that is?" ... They still look confused. "No" they reply. "Boyfriend material" you remark, with a wink.

    Then listen as the waves break in her fanny
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