An ex of mine felt sorry for the poor bugger who had to sit at Bank Underground Station all day advising people to 'Mind the Gap'. She then reckoned on there being three people who did the job in eight hour shifts.
An ex of mine felt sorry for the poor bugger who had to sit at Bank Underground Station all day advising people to 'Mind the Gap'. She then reckoned on there being three people who did the job in eight hour shifts.
My Gran, bless her, used to think the woman on BT Callminder was like a Secretary - "Yes, hello, can you just tell them Grandma called? Thank you, dear."
mates mrs asked if that was France she could see across the sea when visiting Southend once. So he told her not to be silly, it's Belgium. Still today she knowingly tells people this.
Sure I've said this before, but my ex once asked how a fly in an aeroplane could "survive at these altitudes" and once said "turn the barbecue round" when it was blowing smoke in her face.
Mrs Kynsie, after attending her first ever Charlton game (0-2 away to Bradford City in the PL) just after leaving the ground came out with "never mind, it's only a game". Bless her.
This is another one Her "Do you think.I should dye my hair brunette?" Me "Yeah, why not, I think it would look nice." Her "So you don't like it blonde then?"
Ffs!
on the way to R and N's wedding we drove past leeds castle and my mrs turned to me
her "bloody hell, we got here quick" me "where" her "leeds"
This is another one Her "Do you think.I should dye my hair brunette?" Me "Yeah, why not, I think it would look nice." Her "So you don't like it blonde then?"
Ffs!
on the way to R and N's wedding we drove past leeds castle and my mrs turned to me
her "bloody hell, we got here quick" me "where" her "leeds"
This is another one Her "Do you think.I should dye my hair brunette?" Me "Yeah, why not, I think it would look nice." Her "So you don't like it blonde then?"
Ffs!
on the way to R and N's wedding we drove past leeds castle and my mrs turned to me
her "bloody hell, we got here quick" me "where" her "leeds"
This is another one Her "Do you think.I should dye my hair brunette?" Me "Yeah, why not, I think it would look nice." Her "So you don't like it blonde then?"
Ffs!
on the way to R and N's wedding we drove past leeds castle and my mrs turned to me
her "bloody hell, we got here quick" me "where" her "leeds"
This is another one Her "Do you think.I should dye my hair brunette?" Me "Yeah, why not, I think it would look nice." Her "So you don't like it blonde then?"
Ffs!
on the way to R and N's wedding we drove past leeds castle and my mrs turned to me
her "bloody hell, we got here quick" me "where" her "leeds"
You sure that weren't you Dave?
well, now you mention it.......
How's my bar/bedroom coming along?
we get the keys on wed 29th then that weekend we are doing your bedroom.
Women in the office talking about their diets and food they are eating all.the.time. Protesting how healthy they are, boasting about who has the most healthiest lunch and then still saying how fat they are....
One woman in the office has been diagnosed as obese but still tells everyone how healthy her meals are and has a go at other people's exercise regimes.
Women in the office talking about their diets and food they are eating all.the.time. Protesting how healthy they are, boasting about who has the most healthiest lunch and then still saying how fat they are....
One woman in the office has been diagnosed as obese but still tells everyone how healthy her meals are and has a go at other people's exercise regimes.
Ridiculous.
haha so true.
I had one fat bird sitting near me on the train the other day and she was saying about her healthy diet but because it was a friday she was allowed a treat.
she ate 4 donuts between charing cross and blackheath.
Women in the office talking about their diets and food they are eating all.the.time. Protesting how healthy they are, boasting about who has the most healthiest lunch and then still saying how fat they are....
One woman in the office has been diagnosed as obese but still tells everyone how healthy her meals are and has a go at other people's exercise regimes.
Ridiculous.
haha so true.
I had one fat bird sitting near me on the train the other day and she was saying about her healthy diet but because it was a friday she was allowed a treat.
she ate 4 donuts between charing cross and blackheath.
Just the four? Woman in my office calls it a 'sin' (apparently technical terminology for her obese class). Apparently her teacher told her you can fill up on fruit till you can't eat anymore if you need something sweet, she had alot of fruit on Tuesday (apparently) so to fill that sweet craving she was having had a couple of kitkats.
Same woman is giving my mate advice on triathlon training.... How he keeps a straight face I have no idea.
This is another one Her "Do you think.I should dye my hair brunette?" Me "Yeah, why not, I think it would look nice." Her "So you don't like it blonde then?"
Ffs!
on the way to R and N's wedding we drove past leeds castle and my mrs turned to me
her "bloody hell, we got here quick" me "where" her "leeds"
You sure that weren't you Dave?
well, now you mention it.......
How's my bar/bedroom coming along?
we get the keys on wed 29th then that weekend we are doing your bedroom.
my mate who is also a mother managed to put some pizzas in with the polysterene packaging that came with it, thinking they were there as one time use baking trays.
Complete turnip.
I did that as well!!!!! But I messed up a Pot Noodle!
My 7 Y/o on holiday in Bulgaria after seeing a stampede of fat women heading towards the salad said "Dad Im not going near the salad cart I think it makes you fat!"
Got phoned 3 times in an hour yesterday by my ex who's flying over from Estonia and is having me meet her at the Airport.
1st time: "I'm arriving at 4" 2nd time: "No sorry, there was a 4 in the number. Getting in at 2pm. See you there" 3rd time: "Sorry again! I'm changing at Helsinki at 2pm, should be with you by 3:30"
She works in finance dealing with numbers all day.
Better man than me Mr Happy. I wouldn't go out the way to pick up my ex if it was from the bus stop round the corner................
To be fair, I did pretty much beg her to come over and visit me. Phase two of my plan is to convince her to re-locate to London again... got it pretty bad for this girl.
Comments
If ever you want the beautiful extremes of Cl emphasised in two posts, there you are !
on the way to R and N's wedding we drove past leeds castle and my mrs turned to me
her "bloody hell, we got here quick"
me "where"
her "leeds"
One woman in the office has been diagnosed as obese but still tells everyone how healthy her meals are and has a go at other people's exercise regimes.
Ridiculous.
I had one fat bird sitting near me on the train the other day and she was saying about her healthy diet but because it was a friday she was allowed a treat.
she ate 4 donuts between charing cross and blackheath.
Same woman is giving my mate advice on triathlon training.... How he keeps a straight face I have no idea.
Put one of them on for lunch on Boxing Day to be greeted with,
'Didn't you like the other one then'?
I mean I know Peru is different continent and there was shah of Iran but think i am having a WHOOSH moment
25.media.tumblr.com/bced16f6c9546149210e2e7e37b49e20/tumblr_mkxej6pNwA1rthazvo1_400.gif
Q. Who was Bobby Charlton's famous footballing brother? A. Bobby Moore.
Q. Who has won the most Liverpool-Everton derbys? A. Derby.
She's still ****ing mental though.