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Jokes..

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    I was at the fairground in the queue for the guess your weight stall.
    When I eventually got to the front the bloke looked at me and said, "About 20 minutes?"
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    Taxi_Lad said:
     
    Can't be a genuine Millwall supporter - all the apostrophes are in the right places.
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    By appointment to HRH KC III

    May be an image of swan goose and text
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    Enjoy the street party?
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    During the summer holidays one of our class was given the school hamster to look after but they’d always die during the break and then someone else had to look after the hamster
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    MrWalker said:
    Mate just told me its the law that you to have dipped headlights on when it's raining in Sweden.

    How the feck am I supposed to know if its raining in Sweden?
    Is that even when you are walking?
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    I was in Frome yesterday and saw this outside a baker's shop.

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    Fucking hell, is this what this thread has come to.
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    R0TW said:
    Fucking hell, is this what this thread has come to.
    I don’t get it?
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    A guy gets in an elevator with a very large man.  The large man starts talking.

    ”Hi!  I’m 210cm tall, weigh 110kg, have a 40cm-long penis, a right ball that weighs 1kg and a left ball that weighs 1.5kg”

    He then puts out a hand and adds “Turner Brown”

    All of a sudden the little guy faints.  When he wakes up he asks the big guy “What did you say?”

    The guy repeats “Hi!  I’m 210cm tall, weigh 110kg, have a 40cm-long penis, a right ball which weighs 1kg and a left ball which weighs 1.5kg”.  Again he puts out his hand and adds “Turner Brown”.

    ”Oh’ says the little guy ‘I thought you said turn around!”
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    Asked the checkout guy at the petrol station why the tyre pressure machine costs a pound these days when it used to be free, he said inflation.
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    Meanwhile, in Scotland …


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    There are only 10 types of people; those who understand binary and those who don’t.
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    I'm reading a suspense novel in Braille. Something is about to happen, I can feel it.
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