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Farts

A-R-T-H-U-RA-R-T-H-U-R
in Rumours
Did AFKA notice?

Comments

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    1StevieG1StevieG
    Pffffffftttttttttt.......
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    cashncarrycashncarry
    Never trust one ,especially on holiday in Goa
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    ForeverAddicktedForeverAddickted
    edited November 2015
    Beware the bloke who is concentrating whilst waiting for the train doors to open, they'll usually then smile... that's a sign they've just farted

    Although if they look concerned, it means they've probably just got more than they bargained for
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    SillybillySillybilly
    Timing one right as you leave a lift or get off an upward bound escalator is one of the few joys left in life IMHO.
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    ForeverAddicktedForeverAddickted
    Sillybilly said:

    Timing one right as you leave a lift or get off an upward bound escalator is one of the few joys left in life IMHO.

    Especially if one of the following applies when your in a lift!!:

    - There are annoying parents with a screaming baby still in the lift.
    - If there is genuinely someone you don't like left in there (Always a giggle if your mate is still in there too)
    - If you've got a total prick in the lift (i.e. If they haven't said thank you when you've held the door open for them)
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    AlgarveaddickAlgarveaddick
    Those ones that go off like an ack ack gun as you run down stairs...
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    AlgarveaddickAlgarveaddick
    Sillybilly said:

    Timing one right as you leave a lift or get off an upward bound escalator is one of the few joys left in life IMHO.

    I just "fart-bombed" myself.

    Just as I got out of the car to go to the supermarket, I let one go. Ten minutes later, with the car basking in 21degree sunshine I returned to the smell of a week-dead polecat.

    Stuffing and sprouts with dinner last night and baked beans for breakfast will do that to you...
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    LincsaddickLincsaddick
    here I sit broken hearted
    paid me penny
    ... and only farted ((:>)
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    Darty ValiantDarty Valiant
    I love it when one comes out warm and you know it's gonna be a stinker. Far more satisfying than one that is noisy but lacks a quality perfume.
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    1StevieG1StevieG
    Beans, beans, the musical fruit, the more you eat, the more you toot......
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    ForeverAddicktedForeverAddickted
    edited November 2015
    Remember, whoever smelt it dealt it, although whoever did the rhyme did the crime
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    SillybillySillybilly
    Or when in bed and my wife (who has never consciously farted in her life) is asleep. You let off one of those silent but profoundly violent numbers then pretend to be asleep. Ten minutes later she moves and breaks the duvet vacuum and kerpow!
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    SimonsenSimonsen
    Jessie, Jessie, Jessie.....you really shouldn't be lolling on a fart thread! I'm so disappointed in you!!
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    SimonsenSimonsen
    Sillybilly said:

    Or when in bed and my wife (who has never consciously farted in her life) is asleep. You let off one of those silent but profoundly violent numbers then pretend to be asleep. Ten minutes later she moves and breaks the duvet vacuum and kerpow!

    D'you reckon Liz & Phil The Greek have the same sort of thing going on? Especially as he's getting on a bit now and his Newingtons are no doubt all over the gaff.
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