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How long is too long to stay living with parents?

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  • Just turned 23 myself and currently rent out in Spain just outside of Barcelona where I now work.

    Left at 18 for uni, hated it and didn't get what I wanted from it and the idea of an office job in something completely unrelated like recruitment seemed awful although some uni friends have gone down that route and seem to be doing okay out of it.

    Cleaned dishes at Comptoir in Bluewater for 6/7 months and between my savings and help from mum and dad, which I'm extremely grateful for, was able to get myself qualified as an English teacher to foreign learners.

    Not sure I'll be here forever and expect I might yo-yo.. enjoying my time but money as an EFL teacher isn't great and long term options are still a worry as I don't think you can rent forever.

    The parents have sold our old house in Dartford and moved up to the peak district.. can't say coming back is very appealing as although I love them to pieces it's only them I know around there.. Guess we'll just have to see happens.

    in London and the south east I do believe that some people really will have the pleasure of renting forever
  • edited May 2018
    SE23 said:

    SE23 said:

    SE23 said:

    Why own somewhere that you do not really own ?

    What ?

    SE23 said:

    JaShea99 said:

    Maybe because some don’t want to spend their whole life lining someone else’s pockets or maybe because some don’t want to get to 50 with nothing to show for it. Just two ideas off the top of my head.

    Am not lining anyone's pocket! Rent is regulated and is at least half as cheap as in the UK and my pension will be at least twice as much! The buying culture in England holds no dividends now unless you are very lucky.
    So when you retire and maybe want to move, your landlord will reimburse all your rent to the tune of £250K, as he insisted that you didn't line his pockets :smile:

    And your new landlord will let you live there rent free, as he wouldn't want you to be at a disadvantage to all those homeowners, who have paid off their mortgages and no longer have to pay for their accommodation.
    My rent will be covered by the state part of the retirement package here.
    What? You do not own anything! The bank does!
    What are you talking about?
  • If you literally can’t afford to save then I do understand but I work with several early 20’s who are driving relatively flash cars paying £200-300 a month finance.

    Now admittedly I’m not a car person, but I had a shitty Peugeot 106 for 4 years then bought my 04 fiesta off my bro in 2009 for a few k and am still driving it now and will keep doing so until it dies or starts costing to much.

    Saving on car finance on a flash car each month could save you 20 odd thousand over a decade and that’s just one thing.

    I know it’s not black and white for these type of scenarios but you get the jist.

    Think for some it’s too easy to repeat the general consensus that it’s impossible and give up before they’ve tried. It’s surprising how savings can add up when you get into the routine.

    Very true - and flash phones on a relatively expensive contract. One of the ways we were able to pay a huge amount off our mortgage was to take our own lunch to work. I know it sounds funny, but others would come in every day and buy sandwiches and pies and stuff from the food van, or from M & S or Sainsburys. Cans of coke from the corner shop, expensive coffees from Starbucks etc. We would make a sandwich, bring in a can from a six pack we bought at the supermarket, a bag of crisps from a multi-pack and make our own tea and coffee. Compared with some we were saving £10 a day between us. £50 a week extra off your mortgage (or saved for a deposit) is a lot of money. Add that to Craig's £250 or so on a car, that's five grand a year (yes I know there will still be costs - but you get my drift).

    We often suggest to friends with kids what others have said - that if you want to help give them a start, charge them rent and save it for them.

    This all day long.

    I am by no means a tight arse, but when you actually look at how much money you waste on unneccessarily eating out, booze and buying lunch at work, rather than taking packed lunch - the numbers are frightening.

    We worked out last night that even if we ditch my habit of a couple of pints after work, and a bottle of wine (shared) each week night, then we would save $150 a week, which in turn looks like $600 a month and then $7200 a year!!

    Like other have said on here, and as our Grand Parents have always pointed out - "Look after the pennies, and the pounds will take care of themselves!"
  • SE23 said:

    SE23 said:

    SE23 said:

    Why own somewhere that you do not really own ?

    What ?

    SE23 said:

    JaShea99 said:

    Maybe because some don’t want to spend their whole life lining someone else’s pockets or maybe because some don’t want to get to 50 with nothing to show for it. Just two ideas off the top of my head.

    Am not lining anyone's pocket! Rent is regulated and is at least half as cheap as in the UK and my pension will be at least twice as much! The buying culture in England holds no dividends now unless you are very lucky.
    So when you retire and maybe want to move, your landlord will reimburse all your rent to the tune of £250K, as he insisted that you didn't line his pockets :smile:

    And your new landlord will let you live there rent free, as he wouldn't want you to be at a disadvantage to all those homeowners, who have paid off their mortgages and no longer have to pay for their accommodation.
    My rent will be covered by the state part of the retirement package here.
    What? You do not own anything! The bank does!
    What are you talking about?
    @Covered End I think he's referring to a mortgage, the bank owns your house until you pay the Mortgage off, so in effect you just rent it from the bank?
  • My retirement plan is to buy a cheap narrow boat in a couple of years and do agency work for 2-3 months at a time with long breaks between. When I'm ready for the home I'll just take it out to sea...
  • edited May 2018

    If you literally can’t afford to save then I do understand but I work with several early 20’s who are driving relatively flash cars paying £200-300 a month finance.

    Now admittedly I’m not a car person, but I had a shitty Peugeot 106 for 4 years then bought my 04 fiesta off my bro in 2009 for a few k and am still driving it now and will keep doing so until it dies or starts costing to much.

    Saving on car finance on a flash car each month could save you 20 odd thousand over a decade and that’s just one thing.

    I know it’s not black and white for these type of scenarios but you get the jist.

    Think for some it’s too easy to repeat the general consensus that it’s impossible and give up before they’ve tried. It’s surprising how savings can add up when you get into the routine.

    Very true - and flash phones on a relatively expensive contract. One of the ways we were able to pay a huge amount off our mortgage was to take our own lunch to work. I know it sounds funny, but others would come in every day and buy sandwiches and pies and stuff from the food van, or from M & S or Sainsburys. Cans of coke from the corner shop, expensive coffees from Starbucks etc. We would make a sandwich, bring in a can from a six pack we bought at the supermarket, a bag of crisps from a multi-pack and make our own tea and coffee. Compared with some we were saving £10 a day between us. £50 a week extra off your mortgage (or saved for a deposit) is a lot of money. Add that to Craig's £250 or so on a car, that's five grand a year (yes I know there will still be costs - but you get my drift).

    We often suggest to friends with kids what others have said - that if you want to help give them a start, charge them rent and save it for them.

    This all day long.

    I am by no means a tight arse, but when you actually look at how much money you waste on unneccessarily eating out, booze and buying lunch at work, rather than taking packed lunch - the numbers are frightening.

    We worked out last night that even if we ditch my habit of a couple of pints after work, and a bottle of wine (shared) each week night, then we would save $150 a week, which in turn looks like $600 a month and then $7200 a year!!

    Like other have said on here, and as our Grand Parents have always pointed out - "Look after the pennies, and the pounds will take care of themselves!"

    I didn't move out until I was far too old, mostly because I was up to my ears in debt for years. As I was trying to get my finances straight I took to accounting for every single penny I spent, itemised and categorised.

    I knew I spent a lot of my money on pointless rubbish, but when I saw it all set out in front of me I was shocked at how much money I wasted, even when I was trying to save. Thousands and thousands gone with nothing to show for it.

    Look after the pennies might be a cliche, but that doesn't make it any less true.
  • Greenie said:

    SE23 said:

    SE23 said:

    SE23 said:

    Why own somewhere that you do not really own ?

    What ?

    SE23 said:

    JaShea99 said:

    Maybe because some don’t want to spend their whole life lining someone else’s pockets or maybe because some don’t want to get to 50 with nothing to show for it. Just two ideas off the top of my head.

    Am not lining anyone's pocket! Rent is regulated and is at least half as cheap as in the UK and my pension will be at least twice as much! The buying culture in England holds no dividends now unless you are very lucky.
    So when you retire and maybe want to move, your landlord will reimburse all your rent to the tune of £250K, as he insisted that you didn't line his pockets :smile:

    And your new landlord will let you live there rent free, as he wouldn't want you to be at a disadvantage to all those homeowners, who have paid off their mortgages and no longer have to pay for their accommodation.
    My rent will be covered by the state part of the retirement package here.
    What? You do not own anything! The bank does!
    What are you talking about?
    @Covered End I think he's referring to a mortgage, the bank owns your house until you pay the Mortgage off, so in effect you just rent it from the bank?
    Yes, but if you've retired as he was talking about, you've likely paid your mortgage off and have no mortgage/rent out goings. If you're renting you're probably still shelling out the same amount as you always have.

    I'll have to agree to disagree with SE23 if he thinks renting is financially beneficial to owning.
  • Greenie said:

    SE23 said:

    SE23 said:

    SE23 said:

    Why own somewhere that you do not really own ?

    What ?

    SE23 said:

    JaShea99 said:

    Maybe because some don’t want to spend their whole life lining someone else’s pockets or maybe because some don’t want to get to 50 with nothing to show for it. Just two ideas off the top of my head.

    Am not lining anyone's pocket! Rent is regulated and is at least half as cheap as in the UK and my pension will be at least twice as much! The buying culture in England holds no dividends now unless you are very lucky.
    So when you retire and maybe want to move, your landlord will reimburse all your rent to the tune of £250K, as he insisted that you didn't line his pockets :smile:

    And your new landlord will let you live there rent free, as he wouldn't want you to be at a disadvantage to all those homeowners, who have paid off their mortgages and no longer have to pay for their accommodation.
    My rent will be covered by the state part of the retirement package here.
    What? You do not own anything! The bank does!
    What are you talking about?
    @Covered End I think he's referring to a mortgage, the bank owns your house until you pay the Mortgage off, so in effect you just rent it from the bank?
    Yes, but if you've retired as he was talking about, you've likely paid your mortgage off and have no mortgage/rent out goings. If you're renting you're probably still shelling out the same amount as you always have.

    I'll have to agree to disagree with SE23 if he thinks renting is financially beneficial to owning.
    And I'll have to strongly disagree......with SE23
  • My retirement plan is to buy a cheap narrow boat in a couple of years and do agency work for 2-3 months at a time with long breaks between. When I'm ready for the home I'll just take it out to sea...

    Make sure it is on a river and not a canal or your plan might backfire!
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Roland Out Forever!