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In honour of our Scouse manager

We should put a few Scouse joke's on here , mine is
It's so cold in Liverpool today a scouser put his hands in his own pocket
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Comments

  • Why should you always swerve when you see a scouser riding a bike?

    It could well be your bike he's riding.
  • They found the remains of a dinosaur in Liverpool last week ... it was a Doyathinkhesawus
  • The population of Liverpool has remained the same for the last 30 years. The reason for that is that every time a baby is born the father f***s off!
  • Why wasn't Jesus born in Merseyside?

    Because God couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
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  • edited February 1
    waddya call a scouser in a suit ? .......................


    the accused .... or a scouser in a Mercedes ?

    a car thief
  • waddya call a scouser in a suit ? .......................


    the accused .... or a scouser in a Mercedes ?

    a car thief

    The really old ones are the best!! :wink:
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  • A Scouser went to sign on as usual at the job centre. The job centre staff asked ''Have you worked this week''?
    The Scouser said ''Yes, having helped build a new nuclear power station on Monday and Tuesday, on Wednesday I painted Buckingham Palace''
    The job centre employee, not impressed, said ''You're taking the piss''
    The Scouser replied ''Well you started it''
  • bobmunro said:

    The Pope visits Liverpool and conducts an open air mass by the docks. Scally walks up to him and says "Holy Father could you help me with my hearing". Pope replies "I'll try my son - kneel down before me".

    Scally kneels down and the Pope cups his hands on the scally's ears - says a prayer and makes the sign of the cross "In nomine Patris et Filii et Spiritus Sancti". The Pope then asks the scally to rise.

    "Has that helped my son", says the Pope - Scally replies "I don't know yet, Holy Father - it's next Tuesday".

    Took me far too long to get this...
  • waddya call a scouser in a suit ? .......................


    the accused .... or a scouser in a Mercedes ?

    a car thief

    The really old ones are the best!! :wink:
    as old as most of the 'jokes' on here ((:>)
  • I'm not very good at jokes, how about a song;

    You look in the dustbin for something to eat,
    You find a dead cat and you think it's a treat,
    In your Liverpool.............
  • Whats the difference between a scouse bird, and a shopping trolley.....
    ......a shopping trolley has a mind of its own....!
  • How computers come equipped.
    keyboard.jpg
    469 x 310 - 20K
  • The Kop.
    Greenie said:

    Whats the difference between a scouse bird, and a shopping trolley.....
    ......a shopping trolley has a mind of its own....!

    Back in the days of Thatcher, that was "What's the difference between a Tory minister and a shopping trolley?".
  • How do you make a scouser run faster?
    stick a DVD player under his arm
  • Scouse office
    IMG_2608.JPG
    372 x 461 - 116K
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