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SouthEastern this Morning

There is a trespasser on the line @ Woolwich Arsenal so trains are being delayed @ Dartford as they either go down a different line or are delayed

(Im coming from Gravesend and wanted to go Woolwich yet my train is going fast to London Bridge with no stops)
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Comments

  • Apparently that trespasser was on the line at 5.30am, but they still didn't know where he was by 7.20, so the station recommended we use the Bexleyheath line. I wonder if they'll find him before tonight's rush hour..
  • lol! thats just a joke... Took me two hours to get to Stratford this morning after taking the train non-stop from Dartford to London Bridge and then on to the Jubilee Line.

    Very disappointing from SouthEastern that they didn't let people use the High Speed
  • Apparently a man in a tree near Charlton station.

    Wondering if it's the same bloke that had the police helicopter out at about 2.30 this morning looking for a burglary suspect on the railway track.
  • Most read story on that website... jesus. Then the final indignity of being named and shamed in a local rag.
  • edited August 2014
    Run the fucker over. Or shoot him out of the tree and then run him over.
  • Nah cut the three down... Claim it needed doing and that they unfortunately didnt notice the poor man sitting up there... Enough witnesses (and police) to back the tree cutter's story
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  • Nah cut the three down... Claim it needed doing and that they unfortunately didnt notice the poor man sitting up there... Enough witnesses (and police) to back the tree cutter's story

    No, because then the innocent tree suffers.
  • edited August 2014
    Riscardo said:



    Hes still in the tree

    I reckon it's David Blaine.
  • or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    Not sure whether that is supposed to get him down or off.
  • or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    Thought this was a very weird thing to say, then I went on the News Shopper website and I am cracking up.

    Poor guy though, maybe they shouldn't have named him.
  • So one guy kept me awake last night while a helicopter chased him and then this morning a ton of police cars and ambulances arrive at bottom of my road Incase he falls out of a tree.
    Why can't people go and find a job rather than stealing from others.
  • or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    I read that story, I just can't decide if its tragic or hilarious.

    A friend of mine was an A&E Nurse and she said the things that people would stick up their arses were unbelievable.

    One bloke came in with an entire Orange up his arse and claimed he fell down the stairs after getting out of the bath and "landed on the fruit bowl."
    It's the truth I tell ya, my wife put the fruit bowl at the bottom of the stairs and I fell down them later that evening.

    The banana and the grapes were eaten by the hamster, but it didn't like the taste of the orange!
  • There is a trespasser on the line @ Woolwich Arsenal so trains are being delayed @ Dartford as they either go down a different line or are delayed

    (Im coming from Gravesend and wanted to go Woolwich yet my train is going fast to London Bridge with no stops)

    It's Simon Church still celebrating from last night and telling the trains to Shhhhhh.
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  • edited August 2014
    I heard it was Bikey walking home and they've stopped all services to protect the trains safety.
  • or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    I read that story, I just can't decide if its tragic or hilarious.

    A friend of mine was an A&E Nurse and she said the things that people would stick up their arses were unbelievable.

    One bloke came in with an entire Orange up his arse and claimed he fell down the stairs after getting out of the bath and "landed on the fruit bowl."
    I was at a pub quiz once where one of the rounds was identifying from x-ray pictures the particular items which had been inserted up someone's backside. A Buzz Lightyear toy is the one that seems to stick in my memory.
  • or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    I read that story, I just can't decide if its tragic or hilarious.

    A friend of mine was an A&E Nurse and she said the things that people would stick up their arses were unbelievable.

    One bloke came in with an entire Orange up his arse and claimed he fell down the stairs after getting out of the bath and "landed on the fruit bowl."
    My whole office has just asked me why I've spent the last 30 seconds howling with laughter. Thank you.
  • I was taking a slash and that sheep backed onto me! Repeatedly!
  • ValleyGary - i' read your comment 10 mins ago - and i'm still pi55ing myself at work - my colleagues are wondering why i'm bursting out with spontanoeus laughing.
  • Big question is, is the barst still there?
  • No he is still up there!
  • Really hope that he's got one of three things now (Or ideally all three)

    (1) Is Hungry
    (2) Needs the Toilet
    (3) Has an itch he cant get to because if he tries he falls out the tree
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