Firstly, an apolgy to all. As a well established miserable bugger, i've not been following this Jokes thread and was 300 posts behind.
Very disappointing to read even just the recent posts. Some of the contributions on here, whether the jokes that go too far and might not be everyone's cup of tea, or the responses to each other, go well beyond acceptable posting.
So a few gentle guideline reminders.
Please err on the 'safer side' of funny. Yes i know that is hard to judge from one person from the next, but most people know what is acceptable to stick on an open forum and what should be best told within your own circle in the pub or on email.
Everyone please quit the digging and snipes at each other. Its completely unnecessary. You might not be using the site to form friendships but its certainly not a place to carry out spats either. If you cannot treat other posters with respect, then you risk exclusion from the site, which no one wants and is completely avoidable.
And finally, if ever you feel something is inappropriate then please bring it to a moderators attention (use the inbox at the top to message myself, Lookout, WSS or all three of us in the same message) and we will then make a decision no whether it strays beyond what is acceptable or not. Its down to the moderating team to bring posters to task, not other individuals.
Now, have you heard the one about the bloke from Medway and a goat.....
Watching telly the other day while the wife was in the kitchen counting out the 20p jar. All of a sudden she started effing and blinding for no reason, then threw the jar against the wall and started crying. I thought to myself "allo, she must be going through the change"
Watching telly the other day while the wife was in the kitchen counting out the 20p jar. All of a sudden she started effing and blinding for no reason, then threw the jar against the wall and started crying. I thought to myself "allo, she must be going through the change"
My mate Rob has just set up a joke website where you can post and read funnies till your heart is content....he is a fellow Addick so show him some support - thanks!
The priest at our holy father primary school let the kids shave his hair for charity. He said it felt strange at first but it did make his cock look bigger.......................
Clear/bore off with the digs etc just jokes please
I'd add a joke if I had one but haven't , now I've joined the freak show of waffling on the jokes thread without a joke, read AFKAs post if you don't like what someone has said or ignore it(the bad tasted joke)
A boy comes home from school at 7pm. His dad asks "where have you been?". "I was with Jessica" he replies. "And what were you doing?". "we were revising" he said.
After picking up a snack from the table, the boy says "dad, these fishcakes are lovely"
Dad replies "Wash your hands son, they're f**king doughnuts".
When I was a kid, I went to a psychiatrist for one of those aptitude tests. On the desk he put a pitchfork, a wrench, and a hammer and he said to the nurse: ‘If he grabs the pitchfork, he’ll become a farmer. If he grabs the wrench, he’ll be a mechanic, and if he takes the hammer, he’ll be a carpenter.’ I grabbed the nurse!
This fellow walked into a bar with a chicken under one arm and a crocodile under the other. The barman said, ‘What’ll you have?’ He said: ‘A whisky and soda.’ Then the crocodile spoke up and said: ‘I’ll have a gin and tonic.’ The barman said: ‘That’s amazing. I’ve never seen a crocodile that could talk before.’ He said: ‘He can’t. The chicken’s a ventriloquist.’
I bumped into an old school friend the other day and i asked him what he is up to these days? he said " I prepare meals for druggies, the homeless and pissheads and prostitues" i said "Wow you must work in one of those charity centres" he then said "Nah im a chef at wetherspoons."
Comments
This site
God help the people having deal with this shit day in day out
Firstly, an apolgy to all. As a well established miserable bugger, i've not been following this Jokes thread and was 300 posts behind.
Very disappointing to read even just the recent posts. Some of the contributions on here, whether the jokes that go too far and might not be everyone's cup of tea, or the responses to each other, go well beyond acceptable posting.
So a few gentle guideline reminders.
Please err on the 'safer side' of funny. Yes i know that is hard to judge from one person from the next, but most people know what is acceptable to stick on an open forum and what should be best told within your own circle in the pub or on email.
Everyone please quit the digging and snipes at each other. Its completely unnecessary. You might not be using the site to form friendships but its certainly not a place to carry out spats either. If you cannot treat other posters with respect, then you risk exclusion from the site, which no one wants and is completely avoidable.
And finally, if ever you feel something is inappropriate then please bring it to a moderators attention (use the inbox at the top to message myself, Lookout, WSS or all three of us in the same message) and we will then make a decision no whether it strays beyond what is acceptable or not. Its down to the moderating team to bring posters to task, not other individuals.
Now, have you heard the one about the bloke from Medway and a goat.....
It was his naughty brother Dennis they were after.
www.liquidhorse.com
Are you really a Homosexual ??????
This isn't a dating site............................
I'd add a joke if I had one but haven't , now I've joined the freak show of waffling on the jokes thread without a joke, read AFKAs post if you don't like what someone has said or ignore it(the bad tasted joke)
It later turned out to be a tax disc.
I told him to think it over very carefully as women like that are very hard to find.
One said to the other "How wonderful that we live in a time when we can express our love for each other openly and without discrimination"
bada boom.
"And what were you doing?". "we were revising" he said.
After picking up a snack from the table, the boy says "dad, these fishcakes are lovely"
Dad replies "Wash your hands son, they're f**king doughnuts".
I'm going out with a Jamaican girl at the moment. She wants me to do her hair tonight......
I'm dreading it!