Scotch is a drink. Scottish is a nationality. Sorry to be a pedant.
The English called those north of the border the "scotch". This was a term of abuse.
I can see no reason to change. The ripping up of the hallow wembley turf and the wilful destruction of the goals left deep scars.
AJP Taylor is the historian to look up to see the history of this.
Got some Scottish mates staying over at the moment. Very political left wing Independence Glaswegian types. Been "innocently" calling them scotch all day. One of them I'm sure is about to snap. I'm a really unpleasant little man.
Okay, I'm being thick now (I know that Scots are not Scotch) but why is the drink called Scotch?
I think scotch was the name for Scottish things back in the day but fell out of favour as an adjective for the Scottish people a couple of hundred years ago. But it stuck around for food and drink for some reason
A lorry driver is taking a consignment of bowling balls he picked up in Liverpool back to Manchester on the East Lancs Road. En route, he notices a couple of young lads with a broken down motorbike. He stops and as it turns out they are scousers. Never mind he thought, I'll give them a lift and he pops them in the back of the truck with the bike. As he gets closer to Manchester, he gets stopped by a plod for a defective rear light. While he's at it, the plod decides to look in the back of the truck. He gets straight on the radio. "Hey, Sarge, I've just stopped a lorry. It's a consignment of scouse eggs. What should I do? Two of them have hatched and they've nicked a bike already."
The Lord of the manor was preparing to retire for the night and he asks his butler Woolum to run a bath for him. Woolum returns ten minutes later and tells him his bath is ready. His Lordship thanks him and tells him he'll call for him if he needs anything. So he gets himself settled in the bath then lifts one cheek and let's out an enormous fart. A couple of minutes later Woolum knocks and enters the bathroom with a bottle of water. Looking slightly puzzled, his Lordship says "what are you doing Woolum, I didn't ask for anything". To which Woolum replied "yes you did sir, you said whataboutawaterbottlewoolum".
An old lady sits on her front porch, rocking away the last days of her long life, when all of a sudden, a fairy godmother appears and informs her that she will be granted three wishes.
"Well, now," says the old lady, "I guess I would like to be really rich."
*** POOF *** Her rocking chair turns to solid gold.
"And, gee, I guess I wouldn't mind being a young, beautiful princess."
*** POOF *** She turns into a beautiful young woman.
"Your third wish?" asks the fairy godmother. Just then the old woman's cat wanders across the porch in front of them. "Ooh - can you change him into a handsome prince?" she asks.
*** POOF ***
There before her stands a young man more handsome than anyone could possibly imagine. She stares at him, smitten. With a smile that makes her knees weak, he saunters across the porch and whispers in her ear, "Bet you're sorry you had me neutered."
What a week! I thought I’d registered with the Labour Party. They told me I didn’t share their core values. Well pardon me if I didn’t have time to bomb Iraq.
John Lister @johnlister 3m3 minutes ago Not ruling out Gove right now. Already seen one mediocre contender who came third in group stages go on to win.
On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her.
When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."
Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.
"Oh no, my dear, " replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong."
She paused, wiped away a tear and then continued, "And if that damned ice cream truck hadn't come along, he'd still be alive today!"
Comments
A lorry driver is taking a consignment of bowling balls he picked up in Liverpool back to Manchester on the East Lancs Road.
En route, he notices a couple of young lads with a broken down motorbike. He stops and as it turns out they are scousers.
Never mind he thought, I'll give them a lift and he pops them in the back of the truck with the bike.
As he gets closer to Manchester, he gets stopped by a plod for a defective rear light. While he's at it, the plod decides to look in the back of the truck. He gets straight on the radio.
"Hey, Sarge, I've just stopped a lorry. It's a consignment of scouse eggs. What should I do? Two of them have hatched and they've nicked a bike already."
As an aside, I'm interested to know why you drank battery acid.
I bought a muzzle for my pet duck. Nothing flashy, but it fits the bill.
Now I know it was just a fantasy.
I guess this one doesn't either;
Bonsai lovers are very tolerant people: they hate bigotry.
"Well, now," says the old lady, "I guess I would like to be really rich."
*** POOF *** Her rocking chair turns to solid gold.
"And, gee, I guess I wouldn't mind being a young, beautiful princess."
*** POOF *** She turns into a beautiful young woman.
"Your third wish?" asks the fairy godmother. Just then the old woman's cat wanders across the porch in front of them. "Ooh - can you change him into a handsome prince?" she asks.
*** POOF ***
There before her stands a young man more handsome than anyone could possibly imagine. She stares at him, smitten. With a smile that makes her knees weak, he saunters across the porch and whispers in her ear, "Bet you're sorry you had me neutered."
My wife says its impeccable.
Well pardon me if I didn’t have time to bomb Iraq.
Not ruling out Gove right now. Already seen one mediocre contender who came third in group stages go on to win.
When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."
Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.
"Oh no, my dear, " replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong."
She paused, wiped away a tear and then continued, "And if that damned ice cream truck hadn't come along, he'd still be alive today!"
My wife entered the bedroom just a I was pulling off my boxers......
She said you are to bloody good to them......